Every woman knows a woman who is raped. Nearly no man knows a man who has raped.

9,991 points•2,473 comments•submitted by [deleted] to r/TwoXChromosomes5572& 9 more

Edited to add after seeing 100s of comments: Please re-read the title before commenting.

Second edit to add: I'm surprised by how many men are misreading the second line of the title. Just to be clear, there was no typo in both sentences of my title. The second sentence in the title says, "Nearly no man knows a man who has raped", NOT "Nearly no man knows a man who has been raped". Of course, there should be no reason to add this, but I will anyway because so many men are becoming myopic about this: people raping people is horrifying regardless of gender.

Hopefully my last edit and then I'm gone: It was interesting how, before (and for a few hours after) the second edit, so many men rushed to claim they know men who were raped too. I want to acknowledge this properly - people raping people is horrifying. If you're a man and were sexually assaulted by another woman or man, please report them and get support from the correct channels. It is unfortunate that the world we live in right now doesn't take assaults on men seriously, and I hope this changes soon. However, this is a women's sub and I made a post with women in mind. When I made this post, I'd read this comment in the title on another post in the sub, and it got me thinking about how some behaviors are creepy and predatory, and why we aren't calling them out. So men, we don't expect your friends to announce to you that they are rapists, because as you already know, someone who has committed such a crime isn't going to talk about it. However, you do know people who say things or behave in a way that can contribute to rape culture - your worldview may not have registered it yet, but please keep your eyes open and call out your friends when this happens.

I read a sentence similar to this on this sub and recalled a conversation with my ex that took place around 2012.

My ex and his colleagues were in a parking lot when they saw a woman walk by. One of my ex's colleagues said, "She's got a body I want to rape." He used the word "rape". I asked my ex if he said anything, confronted his colleague about the statement. He said no, he didn't want to create a rift between him and his colleagues.

I recall another time a male friend of this ex commented how he likes bird watching aka ogling women. I immediately called him out on it, but my ex took his friend's side. In fact, he was so convinced that the bird watching comment was harmless and that I was just "overreacting" and "sensitive" that he brought it up for years.

Why do men stand by and not recognize or stand up to creepy behavior of their male counterparts?