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Gfresh404
[–]Endorsed Contributor30303030303030 25 points26 points27 points 12 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Very nicely written, thanks.
The best approach to get girls is to understand that women are easy while at the same time never letting them feel so.
Write it down on your walls guys.
[–]Gfresh404 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
The book itself is actually very well written, considering the subject matter. Almost all the notes I took are actually just verbatim straight from the book.
[–]trpill 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Can you send me the notes
You deleted the thread :(
[–]Gfresh404 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I didn't delete it. You can't see the notes from the original post?
The mods might have removed it because I can't find the post when I just go to /r/TheRedPill. I messaged them about it about an hour ago but have yet to hear back from them.
[–]Killer_Mong00se 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
What was the book called?
[–]crazypsycho 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
link
[–]lelephantitis 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This.
[–]the_red_scimitar 17 points18 points19 points 12 years ago (26 children) | Copy Link
All women, for instance, will have sex on the first date, though few would admit that.
Story from last night. First date. Drink. Convo. The moment was obvious, and I went in for the first kiss, which was met with enthusiasm.
A bit later, she suggests we leave. I ask her to come to my place. She agrees, saying, "but I'm not having sex with you." I told her that was just fine.
We arrive, and immediately get to making out. She decides to remove her top. After a bit more making out, I do the same. She says, "it would be nice to lay down with you, but no sex."
Sure, says I.
To bed, more making out. I'm staying away from the bikini area intentionally, to assure her, "no sex."
Making out is pretty intense, as pants have come off (but not underwear). Of course, that doesn't last too long. Proceeds to oral. Which proceeds to her saying, "I want you in me."
This despite most of the convo being about how I do not do monogamous relationships anymore (i.e. I openly date several women, and ensure they all know that), which she "wasn't sure about".
Net result - long night session, repeat in the morning. Considering the non-monogamy (which would actually suit her better than serial monogamy would - the hallmark of hypergamy).
I never pushed it, and never went further without some sign. I just assured she would want to go further (it does help to know what one is doing with the various lady parts).
I honestly can't speak for "all women", and I actually doubt the claim is true. But women do want sex as much as guys do (generally), and need to feel safe to do so.
[–]Gfresh404 23 points24 points25 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Great example of "Change her mood, not her mind."
[–]1Jaereth 6 points7 points8 points 12 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
In my opinion when a girl says on a specific day "i'm not having sex with you" it's just a shit test to see if you will still try.
I went out one night with a girl from one of my classes when I was in college. We had dinner and tried to go to a movie, but the theater was oddly closed that night. I told her we could just go back to my house and watch a movie (I have lots) and she made sure to say right after that sentence "Ok, but were not going to have sex on the first date, that's not classy" I took her to my room to watch it. On my bed. With the lights off. We had sex.
[–]the_red_scimitar -1 points0 points1 point 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Mmm, yeah, I know a lot of game/pua stuff says that. I'm not sure. Read the signs, and prepare to back the fuck off.
But yeah, frankly, if they do go to your place on a first date, probably sex is at least a possibility. But I would never presume it.
[–]1PaulRivers10 -2 points-1 points0 points 12 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
A shit test is testing your value, so I'm not sure this is a shit test as much as her anti-slut defense trying to convince herself that she's not going to have sex with you (a point she reaches exactly because she does actually want to have sex with you).
[–]1Jaereth -1 points0 points1 point 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I think it's a game. If she says "Oh we are not having sex tonight" (like why would you even bring that up?) and the guy is just like "Oh ok" and doesn't make a move he totally bitched out in my opinion.
[–][deleted] 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
It's a different game with non-monogamy. She knows you have other vaginas, and that there is absolutely no need to trade anything.
I suspect you're right about the antislut defense / value proposition. That's fine though - it's about her self-esteem, which I'd actually like to preserve.
[–]orographic 4 points5 points6 points 12 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Anytime a girl has said "I'm not having sex with you" we've fucked. I don't know if it's a shit test or some way to preserve her image or both but "I'm not having sex" means she is dtf
[–]HMNbean 4 points5 points6 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
this goes in line with the "if they say 'no sex' they're thinking about sex" statement, which makes sense. If they're thinking about and mention it, in the positive or negative, then they obviously see you as a potential partner.
[–]the_red_scimitar 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
If it's said amidst a ton of flirting, I'd take it under advisement. I've certainly heard this before, about it being practically a sure thing, but I'm a bit more circumspect. It is far less about what she says than what she does, and the signs are pretty obvious when they're there.
[–][deleted] 12 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]the_red_scimitar -1 points0 points1 point 12 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Too long a post to do that here. I've been thinking about the relationship of non-monogamy to RP philosophies. It's gonna take some thinking to write something truly useful and coherent.
Edit: remember, much of RP philosophy about SMV has to do with the value in a monogamous relationship. The game is potentially very much different with open non-monogamy (which isn't identical necessarily to polyamory).
[–][deleted] 12 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]the_red_scimitar 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Ok, AFBB is a new one to me, and definition searches yield the same two inapplicable meanings. Elucidate me, please!
But yeah, I suspect the story is familiar to RP-ers - that one bad girl who solidifies and personifies all the RP stuff that, prior to her, was just theory to you. My solution, in addition to deepening my understanding of RP principles, was to examine my own serial monogamy, realizing it was kind of fucked up. There were other factors, experiences, people involved that help it to make sense, but it was driven by the same thing that makes a dedicated RP-er.
Aww shoot, I know the saying, could not Google it as an acronym. I know what it means, and thanks.
[–]jmikolash -1 points0 points1 point 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Your non monogamous approach actually makes your SMV skyrocket in her mind, but I'm sure you know this. Let her justify her way right into your bed. Don't step on the hamster.
There is so much more to it than just SMV. I am an ethical non-monogamist. That means I'm not doing it just to game or take advantage of it. But the whole meaning of what the RP is about actually shifts. I'm still processing this, but it is simply not the same game.
Several avowedly monogamous ladies have, after a first date in which I explained non-monogamy to them (and WHY), turned into full on sexytimes, with them putting absolutely no shit testing on me. Why? Because I was not in competition for "the one" - and neither were they. And afterwards, still no shit-testing. Just good vibes, happy messages, and maybe we'll do that again.
That's just a taste of what I mean by it's a different game.
[–]hoboken2020 -2 points-1 points0 points 12 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
You lucky bugger. You have certain personality traits that make women just want to have fun with you.
I can generate a ton if attraction but it most often goes way too far. Women seem to demand an LTR from me. They love sex with me, but always want something more.
The irony of this: they will bang other guys, have fun for a night and enjoy it very much but say something like 'he just wasn't my type for anything serious'. But with me? They guilt trip me if I want nothing more! Even if I make it clear that I dont want a relationship.
I think it has something to do with my vanilla sexual style. I have very cinematic, passionate, romantic sex. Kiss deeply etc. And i tend to 'make love'...its just my style. I say things like 'i love tasting you' etc. If I was more dirty and chocolate, the women wouldn't get all love sick, perhaps.
I get the relationship thing, but as it is non-mono, that just means everything gets better. I am not a ONS, and I don't seek that in a date either. Sure, they want more, but they know that "more" is shared.
The guilt trip is of course pure shit testing. Frankly, you gave them reasons to believe you were playing the standard game, so they are playing it as well.
And I do the same romantic lovemaking. I'm not a fuck toy. I'm fully invested with a partner, and they know it. I'm just not available exclusively, and they know that as well.
[–]Endorsed ContributorrebuildingMyself 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
one of the lessons I got out of r/seduction before it became a cesspool was something along the line of does she see you as "picket fence or silk sheets."
The concept of alpha fux or beta bux are really two ends of a spectrum. I'm in the same boat as you. I can seduce a woman well beyond her spoken boundaries (she crosses them herself always), but then I apparently put off the comfort vibe so much that she wants a relationship. Alpha enough to get the lay, but beta enough to arouse her commitment-tinglies.
From what I've learned from my own experience is that if you make her feel too secure and comfortable (cuddling after sex, covering her up in bed, way too much non-flirty conversation via text, essentially playing the boyfriend part) then she'll start to get boyfriend feelings and vibes from you.
[–]Endorsed ContributorrebuildingMyself 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Security and comfort are what gets a girl you've already bedded in relationship-mode. I've heard advice like don't cuddle after sex because of post-sex bonding chemicals in the brain. Can't get the energy to jump immediately out of bed most times lol.
[–]Gfresh404 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah but my issue with a lot of those tactics is that they're indirect. While this book focuses on a more direct approach, which can yield quicker results.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
So, I've never taken confidence to mean more than just a word. What I do care about is competence. A competency to do things, an ability, an affinity. You know? It's gotten me by well.
What's your take on this?
[–]Gfresh404 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I've heard Mystery say that and it applies to his method, because it's indirect with a lot of steps.
Confidence is huge, the longest chapter in the book in on.. you guessed it. Confidence is a lot easier to have when you remember a few things. One example: You are the most important person in your life - so why wouldn't you act like it? What it comes down to is fighting the bad social conditioning that has been taught to us all our lives. We're taught to be selfless for the sake of the society at the expense of our individual happiness. We're taught that we must first achieve greatness in order to get the girl. I'll go over more of this and confidence in my next post, but you kind of get the idea.
For the record, there's nothing wrong with the Mystery method because it does get results, I personally just prefer a more direct approach.
[–]xeno_christ 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is really useful for beginners - please post your notes for future chapters.
[–]SuperNinKenDo 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The best way to get girls is actually not to play the game or to think outside the box; it is to avoid playing games and to step outside the box completely.
What's that mean?
[–]FlixFlix 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Where did it all go?
[–]Bert_Nernie 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (16 children) | Copy Link
I would be interested to hear the plethora of reasons you should not accept advice on women from a female. Do you mind writing it out or showing me a reference? Thanks
[–]secularist42 22 points23 points24 points 12 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Would you take advice about fishing from a fish or from fisherman?
[+]Bert_Nernie -8 points-7 points-6 points 12 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
This sounds good on the surface, but it is a false comparison. Women choose their partners. Fish are simply caught. They have no choice in the matter.
[–]secularist42 8 points9 points10 points 12 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
it's actually a perfect example...women choose their partners, yes...but for reasons that they themselves don't understand, therefore they are not a good source of advice.
[+]Bert_Nernie -6 points-5 points-4 points 12 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
And yet they can examine the qualities of their previous partners, and possibly tell you about the men they have chosen in the past.
[–]secularist42 8 points9 points10 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
a woman's logic is inherently flawed as it's based on her emotional state at the time...her examination of anything, especially a relationship, is tainted by her 'feelz' and therefore tells you nothing. she might react entirely different in the exact same situation next time simply because she's happier with her hair that day.
[–]1PaulRivers10 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Have you actually ever actually been part of a social group where you can watch how this goes?
About 50% of the things they say they don't do and don't like in men are things they do and describe what they're actually attracted to. My ex-girlfriend told me she doesn't sleep with guys she's not dating - right before she picked up a friends-with-benefits guy.
If you meet a girl who says she doesn't date players, you can almost guaranteed she dates players. If she "doesn't like drama", she usually loves drama.
The qualities that women don't find attractive? They usually don't talk about them. They don't interest them, so they don't come up in conversation.
At one point I asked women how they met their boyfriend. Then I realized the info I was getting back was...innacurate, so I started befriending their boyfriends and got the story from him.
Her: "We met dancing!" Him: "She created a personals account while dating someone else, agreed to meet up with him, then flaked at the last minute. Several months later he ran into her dancing, asked her to dance, walked her to her car and kissed her."
Her: "We were at a friends party, he was really cute, we ended up talking a long time - then we made out!" Him: "We were at a friends party. I invited her to come back to my tent, offered her a lot to drink, then I made a move on her. We made out (but didn't have sex until a later time). Thank god I did, because if we hadn't made out I have the feeling I never would have had another chance with her." (They're married with kids now).
Half the time you aren't even the target of her deception - girls are under a lot of social pressure about how they're "supposed" to choose who they date, and they really really want to believe that they're doing what they're "supposed" to be doing. They're rewriting what happened in their own head - they're lying to themselves.
I'm not saying they're always lying though - it's like a 50/50 chance. But there's just to much information in there to be useful.
[–]ilovemyself101 3 points4 points5 points 12 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I've always thought of women giving advice on how to date is like a gazelle telling a lion how to hunt, even if it knew how, why would it tell you?
[–]Bert_Nernie -4 points-3 points-2 points 12 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Fair enough, but I still have females in my life who wish me well with the opposite sex. I think they have an incentive to give me good advice because they care about me as a friend. Just like if I could give them advice on guys, I would be happy to.
[–]ilovemyself101 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What advice did they give you?
Because the one's that tell me are always the same "be yourself""be nice, dont make ger mad""buy her a drink". Bitch. No.
[–]ilovemyself101 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I have had this also, but they are very few and far between. Only 1 has ever encouraged me to be polygamous, because it's what I wanted.
The rest just kept trying to convince me to find a nice girl and settle down, when I didn't want to.
[–]Ormild 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Have you ever asked a woman for dating advice? I have because I thought, "Hey, you're a girl, you should know how other girls think, teach me." Then they give such general and mainstream advice that it becomes useless. "Be confident. Be yourself. Buy her flowers." They give advice based on what they got from movies and what they THINK they want from a guy, but it's never what they actually what.
[–]1PaulRivers10 -1 points0 points1 point 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
An ex-girlfriend told me about how she made a list of all the things she wanted in a guy. She looked and looked, and found all of those things in one guy. She tried dating him - and found that she found him incredibly uninteresting (both personality and sexual tension).
She told me this story saying "and that's why the list was useless", she was aware of it herself.
[–]frequentlywrong -1 points0 points1 point 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Read the sidebar.
[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I think the main reason is that women will tell you what they think they want or what they think they ought to want as a posed to what they actually want.
Yeah, I've noticed the same thing.
[–]MoneyMonger1 point 12 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Good notes, keep posting as you get through the book
[–]bludnthunder -1 points0 points1 point 12 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
False belief: females regard looks as equally significant as males do If women do not find a male attractive, he is simply not offering enough genetic value.
False belief: females regard looks as equally significant as males do
If women do not find a male attractive, he is simply not offering enough genetic value.
Contradiction in terms? If women DON'T see looks as important, then how can the second statement be true?
[–]frequentlywrong 12 points13 points14 points 12 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Not a contradiction at all. Attraction is mostly physical for men, but it's mostly emotional for women. Attraction means different things when speaking about women or men.
Genetic value in a woman from a male point of view is her looks. Genetic value in a man from a females point of view is his social status.
[–]Redpillc0re 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The way the sentence is written ("male"), it seems like he s referring to the genetic phenotype, and social value often does not correlate with that.
[–]Gfresh404 -1 points0 points1 point 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Attraction is attraction. It doesn't necessarily always have to do with looks.
[–]tehwankingwalruses -2 points-1 points0 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I believe the idea is attraction for women is the sum of many parts, where for men (at least on a phsyical level) is, can this girl get my dick hard?
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Attraction is not a choice.
[–]magicalbird-3 points 12 years ago [recovered] (5 children) | Copy Link
None of us consciously decides what traits attract us sexually
Disagree since I expanded traits that attracted to me personally consciously. I will admit that some traits attract me more.
[–]Gfresh404 6 points7 points8 points 12 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
So you consciously decide when to get a boner?
[–]Gfresh404 3 points4 points5 points 12 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I think you're combining what you like and what you're attracted to. I like smart women, but I'm attracted to hot women. I'd probably fuck a hot woman, but not (just) a smart woman. And I'd probably marry a hot and smart woman.
[–]gg_s -1 points0 points1 point 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The fat acceptance crowd agrees with that ignorant message. I can call a rotten banana appetizing but my undesire to eat it will remain. The lack of desire despite my mental designation is important, something the undesired fail to account for.
[–]Justus222 3 points4 points5 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Don't cater to their whims, or let them set frame. If they start doing this, bring the ball back into your court. Don't try to be Mr. Different, by qualifying how different or good you are, just set the right frame and be confident, and you will project this.
[–]LadyLumen -1 points0 points1 point 12 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
"All women, for instance, will have sex on the first date"
I agree with a lot of this stuff, but I feel like this was definitely a huge generalization. There are certainly a lot of women who would have sex on the first date, even though they don't admit it. But saying that ALL women would is definitely a false assumption.
[–]gg_s 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
If a woman was sufficiently attracted and could emotionally get away with it, absolutely she would give it up on the first date. A lot of women do this, "get hurt" (guilt), and enact a n-date rule to avoid coming off as a total slut.
[–]LadyLumen 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Sure, it's definitely possible and maybe it's common. But I loathe the use of the word "all" because the use of absolutes makes any ideology inaccurate. What if the woman in question was a Lesbian or a Nun?
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