"Will misconduct scandals make men wary of women at work?" Why yes, AP. I think that's the idea.

BlockNotDo · 2017-12-12T02:05:11+00:00

I really wish we had context in these situations.

I have done and said things with female work colleagues that they were 100% on board with and were fully participating. Sometimes they were jokes; other times they were legitimate flirting. In the moment, no one in their right mind would have called any of it sexual harassment or sexual assault.

But if one of those women decides 20 years from now that they want to tell their #MeToo story, they could certainly make those stories sound pretty bad. And I couldn't denying them without lying. My only truthful defense would be "yeah, that happened, but in context, everyone was on board". But that is going to get an eyeroll and skepticism from a whole bunch of women who wouldn't understand that other women could willingly participate in sexual workplace jokes.

EricAllonde · 2017-12-12T03:04:05+00:00

Ana Quincoces, a Miami-based attorney and entrepreneur who owns her own food line, says her business and its success involves working mostly with men, and sales and other activities are often concluded over lunch or drinks. Those opportunities, she says, are dwindling, because many of the men she knows through her business “are terrified.”

The sad thing is that, while it's professional-victim feminists driving the witch hitch, the consequences of it harm non-feminist women too.

Like this entrepreneur: she's the sort of women that feminists hate, because she's clearly not a victim, she's going out and making things happen for herself rather than sitting at home and blaming men. If you asked her about the gender pay gap she'd probably laugh in your face, and rightly so. But now the professional victims aka modern feminists are pulling her down with them.

W. Brad Johnson, a co-author of a book encouraging male mentors for women, says limiting contact sends a troubling message. “If I were unwilling to have an individual conversation with you because of your gender, I’m communicating ‘you’re unreliable; you’re a risk,’” says Johnson, a U.S. Naval Academy psychology professor.

I don't think that's quite right: a female employee can be a risk without being obviously unreliable.

Jessica Proud, a communications professional and Republican political consultant in New York City, said it would be wrong if this national “day of reckoning” over sexual misconduct resulted in some men deciding not to hire, mentor or work with women. She recalled a campaign she worked on where she was told she couldn’t travel with the candidate because of how it might look.

Another woman who's almost certainly not a feminist victim, but now may pay a price personally because of what feminists have done. Sad.

McFeely_Smackup · 2017-12-12T05:41:23+00:00

I haven't talked to a female coworker since 2001.

I mean, yeah...I've talked to them, but just not about anything even close to not work related.

After seeing two guys lose their jobs over some really petty bullshit, I realized that interacting with women in the workplace in anything other than "strictly professional" manner was basically like playing with a cobra. Eventually, and probably without warning, it's going to bite you...and if it never does, that was the cobras decision, not yours.

As a result, i don't go to lunch with female coworkers...I don't talk about the weekend plans, TV shows, nothing at all. If it's not directly work related, I excuse myself from the conversation.

Last year I worked with a woman who was a really cool chick. Great at her job, everyone liked her, she was into comics and video games...but she had a real temper problem and would frequently have meltdowns at work. One day her boss (whose office was next to mine, so I could hear every word) brought her into his office and said "you need to calm down, you cant be yelling at people like this" and she told him, and I quote "Fuck you, I quit!" and stormed out, slamming his office door.

I found out later that she hadn't even left the parking lot before realizing she'd just rage quit her job for no reason, and called HR sobbing, claiming she "just couldn't take the harassment any more".

So yet again, I find an HR "investigation" going on around me...everyone being interviewed about their interactions with this woman, her harassment complaint, etc. When it was my turn, I said 'I've never spoken with her about anything not work related" and it was honestly true.

All it did we reinforce that I'd made the right decision, and that it was not going to change. And that was before shit got way, WAY worse in the last year.

Right or wrong, this current climate of weaponized victimhood is going to make things far worse for women than it is for men. How many women are going to get passed over for jobs because it's just not worth the risk/hassle?

Fortspucking · 2017-12-12T06:11:50+00:00

It's not a backlash. It's a sensible response. Calling it a backlash just adds to the misandry.

Tedesche · 2017-12-11T23:16:07+00:00

I certainly hope it does. There needs to be a backlash over this. Only then will women disavow these feminist fear-mongering campaigns and start shouting down the hysterics when they start screeching.

Mens-Advocate · 2017-12-12T00:04:03+00:00

The greater danger is that it gives any woman with a grudge complete control over who become our political, corporate, and media leaders.

monkeyboy247 · 2017-12-12T07:15:21+00:00

So, despite all the ridicule hurled his way, VP Mike Pence was right all along?

ThePigmanAgain · 2017-12-11T23:48:10+00:00

Can't comment, busy firing all my female employees.

secondclassguy · 2017-12-12T05:49:50+00:00

If you think women get pissed at what you say to them now, just wait how pissed they are when you say nothing to them

WolfeBane84 · 2017-12-12T05:07:35+00:00

There was a woman in my office. We were both grad students, and i was sports coordinator for my department, meaning i paid for campus sports teams and made sure everyone who joined paid me back.

Anyway, I'm trying to be firm on deadlines because i always get burned when i trust people to pay me later. She messages over facebook pleading to save her a spot on the soccer team and that she will pay me garunteed. I figure, I have proof she said she owed me, i see her around the building day to day, why not.

She doesn't come to a single game but keeps promising she will. I'm beginning to feel I'm gonna get burned for the money. On the day of the last game, I encourage her to come out "because it will be really fun" like i had other weeks. Never did i ever say "hey! You owe me money!". I figured being nice and using warm lanhuage about how fun the soccer league is (despite her knowing wuite well she begged me to keep her on the team and promised payment on facebook).

Later on, maybe i was going to message her again, i notice she had unfriended me. I get it. I've been burned. I send an email to the three people who burned me saying there's nothing i can do to get paid back, but it would be nice if they held true to their word. I'm out $60 this semester, but i blame myself for trusting people to be decent and leave it at that. She's obviously a bit fucked in the head so I'm not gonna cause an office drama over beer money because I'm honestly worried how she might spin it. So i let it go.

I avoided making eye contact with her in halls and lunchrooms. Just pretend she doesn't exist and it works oit alright. A few days before I'm leaving because i defended my thesis, we pass each other in a secluded stairway and it's awkward. I call her when we're back in the main building atrium and say something along the lines of "It's ok. It's just money. You don't have to avoid me. It's cool".

I expected an apology because the tone of our voices is that of two people hashing out a previous disagreement in a forgiving way.... Then i listen to what she has to say and it throws me off big time. Basically she starts making up a narritive about how i was pressuring her to do something she didn't want and was a bully and her lab partners were there as wittness and all think I'm a jerk"..... She was expecting an apology from me. I'm not great at social conflict, so the best i could do was go numn in the fsce and nod and pretend i was listening to her in an understanding way. I figured there was no way to argue to Crazy, so just walk away and avoid her because my worst suspicions of her being capable of accusing me of workplace harrassment are true. So i continue to ignore her for the rest of my time there. $20 was not worth dealing with her crazy.

Fastforward 6 months. I'm back visiting my buddies in town. My friend tells me a story of how this same girl gets some staff member fired by going to campus police and reporting some sort of harrassment against him. I felt like i dodged one giant torpedo. I was weeks away from leaving after successfully wrapping up my Master's. Thank god i had the self control and wisdom to know not to pick a fight with someone even though i was in the right.

Nowadays i just straight up don't trust people to take advatage if they can. My mindset has helped me avoid future issues with people since then. There are really unethical people out there thst are not above lying to make monetary or career gains off of you. You just always have to be on gaurd... But unfortunately i have noticed that it is often women who try to use their gender to their advantage when conning you.

It's very unfortunate because i now have very little trust for women but do not want to feel that way because it is very pessimistic and i would like to believe i can trust people, including women, and not have to worry about how they might try to take advantage of me. At the same time, always being on gaurd has helped protect me against would-be predators, so I'm conflicted....

It was only this year that a woman tried to blackmail me by threatening a FRA. Luckily, i caught her on recording explaining her threat like some sort of batman villain, so I'm somewhat safe. Cops said i did the right thing handling her, but also gave the realistic advice of letting it go because "99% her threats are empty". Apparently trying to blackmail someone with am FRA and having evidence against you proving it isn't enough to get you in trouble with the law. The officer who advised me to let it go probably empathised but wanted to convince me to choose the most realistic option to stay out of trouble, which was "do nothing and hope she doesn't follow through with the FRA".

Atheist101 · 2017-12-12T03:46:32+00:00

The only safe and legal contact between men and women is going to be online or dating apps.

soEezee · 2017-12-12T10:00:38+00:00

So I was driving home from work the other day and was getting kinda bored so decided to flip out the 'ol nokia. I then notice a Tesla model S merge in front of me, it's not a legal requirement to have insurance and of course, I don't. Faced with the possibility of writing off a car worth more than my car and house combined, hands immediately went to 10-2, distance between us increased to several seconds and moved out of the lane first opportunity.

I don't want to feel that way by being around women but following r/news, here and watching afternoon tv I've pretty much convinced myself that mgtow is the only option that doesn't involve an unacceptably high risk to my economic and emotional wellbeing.

boringcarpets · 2017-12-12T07:42:11+00:00

Yes. Everyone in my line of work knows that a stag ship is the best ship, and if having women in your team doesn't cause even a little bit of concern then you haven't been paying attention

Title	"Will misconduct scandals make men wary of women at work?" Why yes, AP. I think that's the idea.
Author	WarOfNoise
Upvotes	144
Comments	49
Date	December 11, 2017 8:19 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/7j4ya7/will_misconduct_scandals_make_men_wary_of_women/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/will-misconduct-scandals-make-men-wary-of-women-at.909531 https://theredarchive.com/post/909531

Comments