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'Guilty until proven innocent': life after a false rape accusation A growing group of men and women are calling for changes in the law around sexual assault to protect those who are the victims of false accusations

TR6Cool

October 28, 2015

870 upvotes

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Post Information

Title	'Guilty until proven innocent': life after a false rape accusation A growing group of men and women are calling for changes in the law around sexual assault to protect those who are the victims of false accusations
Author	TR6Cool
Upvotes	870
Comments	79
Date	October 28, 2015 1:32 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/3qk3vl/guilty_until_proven_innocent_life_after_a_false/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/guilty-until-proven-innocent-life-after-a-false.968445 https://theredarchive.com/post/968445

Comments

[–]Jernlov 91 points92 points93 points 10 years ago (35 children) | Copy Link

[–]kragshot 42 points43 points44 points 10 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link

That is if they let you sue. In many cases, the courts of a given jurisdiction will refuse to allow the case on the docket.

After I pursued and obtained a declaration of innocence in my FRA case, I decided to go after the woman who falsely accused me. After three attempts to have my case heard, I was told off the books to "back off" or else "I would be found guilty of something." I was told in no uncertain terms that I "should just take my little victory and go away or else."

My case did more than expose an adulterer; I made a lot of people look very bad by thwarting their case against me.

The other "charm" of false accusations is that they make police departments and prosecutors look good. It puts out the message that they are "hard on crime." Rape is such a visceral criminal violation that it often will galvanize an entire community or larger. Look at how many "high-profile" rape cases we see in the media. When that happens, it places great pressure on the local law enforcement and justice departments to act and act quickly.

With the huge anti-rape lobby we have today, the pressure to succeed and find a suspect is greater for law enforcement and prosecutors than ever. They've got to find a culprit or else. So, more times than not; they are driven to "like somebody" for the rape and then hold on to that subject like a pit bull even if evidence to the contrary may become available. The only way that they will concede to contrary evidence is if a "more likely or suitable" subject is found.

Because at this point...it is not about justice. It is about appearances, presumptions, and re-appointments/re-elections.

[+]VoicelessFeather 10 years ago [recovered] (6 children) | Copy Link

Isn't there some action to be taken against a corrupt court? Or are you helpless to be "found guilty of something". I find that absurd.

[–]kragshot 14 points15 points16 points 10 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[+]VoicelessFeather 10 years ago [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link

Wow, that sucks. I'm reasonably sure the court couldn't do anything at all to you, unless they completely ignored due process. If I was in that situation I would have done the same thing, so I shouldn't talk.

[–]kragshot 13 points14 points15 points 10 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

The other reason I left home was to let the heat die down on my family...I wasn't the only one who was catching hell about the accusation. My family suffered nearly as much as I did and it cost them a pretty penny to help with the legal funding and paying for the therapy to keep me from falling into the abyss. (As it turns out, I actually have a "rich uncle" and he was able to help me out greatly. The only regret that I have now is that he offered to set me up out-country to start over. I didn't want to get that far away from my family back then...but I should have in retrospect.)

But there was a lot of social pressure on my family as well, especially because they continued to defend my and maintain my innocence. This especially included my sister who is a DV/rape survivor. It was very hard on her but she stuck by my side through the whole thing and didn't let her personal issues taint her love and belief in me...especially when her counselors were very vocal in their belief that no woman lies about rape.

When it was all said and done, my family stood by me and it cost them dearly. Leaving home was the only way I could give them a chance to resume their lives without worrying about me.

Now you know why I am so adamant about fighting this evil. Because it is evil...the kind that destroys souls and crushes families...the same way that an actual rape affects a rape victim and their family.

[+]VoicelessFeather 10 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link

Absolutely, no protections for the falsely accused, not even being compensated for the legal fees, people not understanding the concept of "innocent until proven guilty", the idea that women never lie, are all evil. But on the bright side, your family sounds amazing.

[–]kragshot 2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Glarks -1 points0 points1 point 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 10 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Rethgil 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]kragshot 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]intensely_human 27 points28 points29 points 10 years ago (23 children) | Copy Link

[–]chocoboat 10 points11 points12 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]intensely_human 2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[+]scurvebeard 10 years ago* [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link

some MIT kids that one of them shared with me the game theory about tit-for-tat strategy.

I heard an episode of RadioLab about this. Some smart people ran a bunch of simulations and--as I recall--found that the best strategy for a slow but steady increase in peace was to retaliate on a 1:1 ratio... but to sometimes, randomly, forgive.

Here's the segment.

[–]intensely_human 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]mwobuddy 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (17 children) | Copy Link

[–]intensely_human 5 points6 points7 points 10 years ago (16 children) | Copy Link

[–]heterosapian -1 points0 points1 point 10 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link

[–]intensely_human 5 points6 points7 points 10 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]heterosapian -2 points-1 points0 points 10 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]intensely_human 2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]heterosapian -1 points0 points1 point 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]intensely_human 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Adrelinen 4 points5 points6 points 10 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

[+]aThoughtCrime 10 years ago* [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link

It really isn't, though. Violence or other negative actions towards another person in retaliation for their own negative actions towards you just generates more negative karma and keeps the cycle going. Buddhists would instead advocate loving-kindness towards this person, since they are misguided. And they have already accumulated negative karma because of their actions, which is punishment in and of itself.

It goes without saying that actually practicing Buddhism outside of a monastery is incredibly difficult.

[–]dungone 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

Regardless of the religion, if you listen to it's teachings and all you get out of it is, "Obey!" then you are certainly not one of it's leaders. All of the world's major religions come with loaded messages that tell you whatever it is you want to hear - or that someone else wants you to hear. And down to the last one, they all teach their lowest ranking members to sacrifice their own best interests for that of the religion and it's higher ranking members. I am sure that if you reflect on this for a little, you will find that this is true about Buddhism as well. Buddhist pacifism is nothing more than having some low-ranking members set themselves on fire (or whatever) to serve the political goals of their leaders. All with a very thinly veiled threat of "we've got the disposable manpower to kick this thing up a notch of you don't comply to our demands". It is just a different form of violence.

[–]Adrelinen 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]heterosapian -1 points0 points1 point 10 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]Adrelinen 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]heterosapian -1 points0 points1 point 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Adrelinen 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]mwobuddy -1 points0 points1 point 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]intensely_human 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Jernlov 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]newharddrive 16 points17 points18 points 10 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link

[–]evolutionof 8 points9 points10 points 10 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]newharddrive 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]BullsLawDan 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]BullsLawDan 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]StabbyPants -1 points0 points1 point 10 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]BullsLawDan 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]StabbyPants 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]BullsLawDan 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]ramot1 14 points15 points16 points 10 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

[–]chocoboat 9 points10 points11 points 10 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

I found the summary of that episode in no time (isn't Google great?)

The school bus driver's public reputation is ruined, he loses his job, and his wife starts to doubt his innocence. The truth comes out, the newspaper prints a retraction and his employer re-hires him, but the other parents won't let their children ride his bus because they still believe he's a pedophile.

Actually I just found the episode here and watched the end of it.

The school principal reacts to learning the truth by demanding that the false accuser's name is published as well, so people can know who was responsible for this mess. Unfortunately Michael Landon's character defends her, saying it's not her fault and nothing will be gained by publishing her name, and that all of the fault belongs with irresponsible reporters who published something before verifying it's true.

At least that stance favors withholding the accused's name from the media and demands that the media should never "listen and believe", but it's also taking the position that women aren't responsible for their actions. Not surprising for 1988 though, in fact it's relatively progressive.

[–]ramot1 4 points5 points6 points 10 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]BullsLawDan 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]ramot1 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]BigOldNerd 2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]ramot1 2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]zulu127 16 points17 points18 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]auronvi 2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Ransal 11 points12 points13 points 10 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Ovendice 5 points6 points7 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Ransal 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Rafa4275 2 points3 points4 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]DrDoSoLittle 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]BullsLawDan 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]bretth104 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]BullsLawDan 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]bretth104 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]BullsLawDan 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]KaonPlus 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[+]Ovendice -13 points-12 points-11 points 10 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link

[–]ABC_Florida 12 points13 points14 points 10 years ago* (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]TR6Cool 5 points6 points7 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]ABC_Florida 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Ovendice -5 points-4 points-3 points 10 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]TR6Cool 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Missing_Links -3 points-2 points-1 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]kragshot 3 points4 points5 points 10 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]Ovendice -1 points0 points1 point 10 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

Not every time you drink and drive are you going to jail. But smart people don't do it. Why? Because the penalties and risk is far too high. And it is the same with dating women in the U.S. You're confusing character issues with legal issues.

Maybe not 'all' women are capable of making a false accusation of rape and violence, but 100% of all of the laws are the same throughout the country, some states simply more horrific than others. And women don't tell you up front they're going to make a false accusation, don't wear a sign saying they are. And how would you tell? Because they say so? LOL Because she has nice teeth, is pleasant at dinner parties, comes from a good family? Sorry to be the one to introduce you to the truth about women, but all of that is called the bait. ALL women are spiteful, petty. jealous, completely unaccountable and vindictive. The perfect storm of elements that lead to false accusations of rape and violence. Oh and btw, don't think false domestic violence accusations aren't as damaging. They keep you from getting good jobs, into nice neighborhoods and I know of a guy who got put away for 20 YEARS for domestic violence because it was his second violation and was even 10 years later! And he didn't even hurt the women really at all and it was a mutual fight, both of them hitting each other.

Until there is a radical change in the laws, dating and/or even being around women is out of the question. And women in the U.S. themselves? Well, with women, it's not even an issue of character and whether or not they are evil or spiteful, it's also a question as to whether or not they are completely INSANE and so incredibly stupid, it borders on pure psychosis. Just look at this: https://i.imgur.com/imyV6Ai.jpg

Look at how they discuss rape, as if they don't even understand what it even IS and actually believe that the laws are corrupt because the law defines rape as a violent sexual assault. And that it's perfectly reasonable to accuse a man of rape if he breaks up with you. These women may as well be from an ALIEN PLANET and that is most women in the U.S. today. I see messages like that all of the time! And every day for the last 20 years there's at least one false accusation of rape in the news- and those are just the more outrageous ones who just happened to get caught. Just try to imagine just how many men have gone to prison who were falsely accused.

You think you know some female and then suddenly one day something comes up like this and suddenly you realize she's psychotic and completely out of touch with reality. It's time for men to stop fooling themselves: IT'S OVER. ALL of it, marriage, dating, even working with women or having anything to do with them at ALL.

Don't point at ME and talk to me like I'm the one who's crazy, no, you know and I know and everyone knows it is WOMEN and the LAWS that are insane and evil. It has NOTHING to do with me.

The situation with women in the U.S. now is a pure living Hell on Earth and a nightmare. A life of drug addiction is nowhere as devastating as the horrors of what women can and will do to you and they have nothing else better to do, have GOD LIKE POWER over you and are 100% completely insane, emotionally unstable, petty, unaccountable, vindictive, jealous, confrontational and toxic.

[–]kragshot 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

Listen son (and I'm 51, so I'm not being condescending...just a bit patriarchal). I've survived a false rape accusation. You don't have to sell me on how fucked up this can get.

Yes it's true; the current legal climate gives every woman the potential to leverage a lie to destroy a man's life. But what you are doing is allowing fear to drive your thinking rather than logic.

Again...if you are that fearful, then by all means; go full Galt and withdraw from society (no, I am being very serious...I am not mocking you). It would be the best thing to assure your peace of mind. Expatriate and head to one of the SE Asian or South American countries. I have a buddy who lives in the Philippines now because he thinks as you do. He's pretty happy now and I'm happy for him.

Otherwise, then you need to stay and fight to turn this around. And attacking women overall is not going to work. There are women who are our allies in this fight...they agree that this power that they have over us is not right.

The choice is yours.

[–]Ovendice 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

I have a far better grip on the reality of the situation both socially and legally than you do and most men in the U.S. You're still living in the past. It's over and those days are not coming back in our lifetime. Women hate men and they are your No.1 enemy.

Forget ISIS, Muslims. The top terrorists in your life are American Women. They hate you, they want to throw you in jail, they want to steal everything you have, take your children, keep you from seeing them and hurt you and be as cruel as they possibly can and will laugh at you when you commit suicide. That was the goal!

Women have been taught to hate you by Feminism and are taught to hate men every single day, all day long in our schools and media. And taught to fuck you over and take everything from you and burn you to the ground using the very court system as the vehicle to do it! Because you are SCUM, a rapist and child molester and murderer and EVIL. That's what they are being taught over and over and over. Women HATE you. Wake the fuck up.

And just because a woman isn't outwardly and openly aggressively spewing hate for men doesn't mean JACK SHIT. You should thank those types for giving you a warning. THE most dangerous women are the ones who do the entire act to pull you in, like a black widow spider into her web. Until you wake up and realize all of this, you're walking under the hammer.

[–]kragshot 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Dude...you're going to have to go that way without me.

My family included a lot of women who stood against the tide of popular opinion and supported me. So...we are going to have to agree to disagree with the total disdain of women.

People make similar generalizations about my fellow African Americans. While I will not deny that there are some of us who are fucking up wholesale; that is an assessment based on human nature as there are people from all demographics who are just horrible human beings. But to brand an entire group in that manner is just completely irrational.

We are fighting the same fight at one level, but I am not going to damn all women for the perfidy of a few. That would make me no better than the rabid feminists who are ready to damn all men.

Go in peace, brother and may you find what you seek....

[–]Ovendice 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Sigh Still not getting it. That's why there's winners and there's losers in life. No matter how much you explain what is going on, unfortunately there's the half that just doesn't get it. The laws women have on their side in this country are a loaded gun to your head with God like power over you. I'm not going to trust even my own mother to hold a gun to my head. The problem is not her, it's the loaded gun to my head. And until the laws change, every man in the U.S. is in extreme danger at any second in a minefield of legal horrors for whatever reason some psycho bitch decides they want to destroy your life. 'Not all women are like that.' That line isn't even applicable to the reality of your life as a man in the U.S. You don't know who they are and all women are insane and justify anything they do to themselves. And we now have TWO whole generations of women now trained to hate you and taught you are the enemy. It's over.