8 years and falling apart

azwildcat74 · 2022-03-16T02:23:21+00:00

She said that we are in our 30s, this is the best time if we would like to have another person in our lives.

I think most of us know what this means...

warrior_up · 2022-03-16T13:59:31+00:00

7-8 years 3 boys - she twisted and turned the end of our marriage into her own monstrous rendition and justification to break up her family at be secured with thousands in monthly child support each month.

All that mattered was her new exciting life as a newly single injured fawn that wanted to ride the cock carousel her last few years before hitting the wall and eventually settling on another man with more money to replace the father of her boys, three boys that love their father and have suffered gravely by not having him around to coach and mentor and discipline them the way a father should, daily.

Now our time is spent in stress, although getting better taking care of three little boys isn’t ideal perse, especially after going through the divorce machine and being on tight budgets living in a two bedroom apartment

Alas, the years pass and I’ve got a new girlfriend, 10 years younger than my ex wife that adores my boys and vice versa. Financially I’m crawling back making more money than I ever have before, my ex now single mom of three boys entering her 40s that has sadly been pumped and dumped by numerous men never really wanting to take on the responsibility of fathering some other mans offspring. Nor should they, why would they??? She’s in desperation mode clinging to whatever gets thrown her way and me, the man that was this horrible husband is more loved and appreciated by women and his kids than he ever was fighting to save his marriage and kids because until death do us part, sickness and in health, richer or poorer was really only for the short moment or “for now” as I always say. But I’m still standing stronger than ever, I’ll get the house back I’ll get my life back I’ll always romanticize this false reality of my ex and how all of this back and forth pick up drop off bs was never ever worth it. She. Regrets everything although she won’t admit it - her reality has sunk in and all I can think of is how sad it is that she couldn’t see this would happen after her time sleeping around and trying to forget what she already had.

I’m rambling but only to let you know to keep moving forward - in the end we get the last laugh but because of the damage caused by divorces you still wish it never happened.

Just Don’t do it again

2022-03-16T02:27:01+00:00

Her clock and value is ticking. Yours is not. That's why she wants to pull the trigger before she runs face-first into the wall.

skaelee · 2022-03-16T03:38:55+00:00

She thinks 30 is the Perfect time to ruin her marriage? 😂😂😂😂 she’s in for such a surprise when she realize the men of today are way more aware of they bull shit and are less likely to deal with a 30 year old with 2 kids men have being saying fuck single mothers for a while now only deal with them for sex and kick they ass out the door don’t worry bro she will be back begging for your forgiveness when she realizes the grass is not about to be greener for no 30 year old single mom

throwsadaccountxxx · 2022-03-16T08:48:27+00:00

I'm 6 months past it, 12y relationship. Of course her decision, her reasons. Life was hard on her, I'm sad she changed to what she is. Selfish, mean, at least toward me. I had my flaws, I get it now, been working on it prior to the divorce anyway. My daughter turned 5 when she left. It was too soon for me, so much. We do 50/50. Like you I'm the one she was calling in the middle of the night and all.

I'm heartbroken about it, fighting depression as hard as I can. I'm still the dad I was, nothing to challenge about the time I'm spending with her, the love I'm giving, supporting and all. But she's getting a bit affected by it. The week I'm not with her are harder. It's weird because there is no really family life anymore. It's more like having a long week end.

Also I'm a child of divorce, never knew my parents together, had some impact on my life I'm concerned she's gonna have to deal with- list is long from other ppl in your parents life, different homes, setup, education, vacations, relationship between your parents,...

Bookworm2007 · 2022-03-16T18:55:21+00:00

I know it’s hard but trust me it’s better that they are too young to remember. My daughter was 6 when my divorce took place last year and she still asks me if me and her mom will get back together and if we still love each other and it breaks my damn heart to see her so hurt by this. She also talks about how much she misses the house we had and her old room. I’m now living in a 2 bedroom apartment in a crappy part of town after giving up our dream home. Dealing with the pain of divorce on your own is bad enough but seeing your kid who you love more than life itself being hurt is just a knife to the heart. I wish you the best brother, never loose that love for your kids it’s the one thing she can never take from you.

Castelino2021 · 2022-03-16T07:48:50+00:00

Aarggg I tell ya , woman , what will keep them satisfied ??????

Basic_Advance7627 · 2022-03-16T14:24:12+00:00

There is no good time for the kids. Mine were 15,16and 21 and it destroyed them when they’re cheating mother left. They ended up mad at the world and super depressed. I couldn’t help them much either cause I fell into a bottomless pit when she left me after 26 years of marriage for another man.

thefudmaster · 2022-03-16T03:44:51+00:00

Bro, as the father of sons, I understand. I spent over $120K in legal fees to get 50/50 time with my kids and although it was tough to nearly declare bankruptcy, it was worth it.

My recommendations follow, since I do not know what your profession is. If you work long hours, or have to be away on travel a lot, that doesn’t provide stability for your children. If you have a job where you are able to care for your sons regularly, you have a great chance of getting 50/50 custody.

My attorney gave me some great advice before we discussed what I wanted in custody. He told me that many of his male clients who only saw their children every other weekend, worked a lot more, made a lot more money, and could travel anywhere they wanted. However, they would become a visitor in the child’s life. Some men might prefer this custodial arrangement. I however, did not. Your mileage may vary.

I will save this after having had 50-50 custody for a number of years. My ex, her husband, and I, get along very well. My ex-wife had an affair, not with her current husband, which ended our marriage. We are not friends, but we are allies in our focus on our shared children. I view her husband as an equal part of the parenting equation, but I truly respect him because he told me that he would never allow the children to call him dad.

If you ever have any more questions, I’m always available to answer.

CowlickCarl · 2022-03-16T02:14:33+00:00

How is she punishing you with the kids? I thought it was a mutual decision?

eastbranch02 · 2022-03-17T07:19:28+00:00

It may not be as bad as you think. My kids were 3 and 6 when I divorced. Sure there were challenges and I had to get used to not seeing them all the time. But you'll develop a relationship with your kids that you could never develop with a wife around. You can raise them your way. They will be happier. And you don't have to bring another woman into your life. In fact I wouldn't recommend it. My house was the house of peace, safety, and happiness. I wasn't going to bring the tension of another relationship into their lives. They are adults now and doing fine and I'm glad I got divorced when I did.

buyinlowsellouthigh · 2022-03-16T15:51:43+00:00

It will hurt the kids less if they are young.

Title	8 years and falling apart
Author	felipemelo3
Upvotes	20
Comments	38
Date	March 16, 2022 2:06 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/tf6ocx/8_years_and_falling_apart/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/8-years-and-falling-apart.1107360 https://theredarchive.com/post/1107360

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