Advice

Skanky_the_Samurai · 2026-07-22T15:30:40+00:00

Try to get it finalized ASAP. As others said, it could turn nasty REAL fast. Try to get it finalized before she has the seed planted in her head. Then resist the urge to be friends with her or get back together. At all costs.

DarthDad25 · 2026-07-21T20:37:22+00:00

Firstly, very sorry you’re going through this. My divorce process is coming to an end in 1.5 weeks. It’s been a year and a half of pain, betrayal, and lies.

You’re doing the right thing by going straight to divorce. I tried reconciling after the infidelity and it about broke me. It’s far better to cut the snake at the head and move forward. You’re much younger, have a lot of life ahead, and I’m assuming you don’t have any children involved since you didn’t mention any. It should be a simple and straight forward process.

I do recommend getting an attorney. I hired one with a 5k retainer and I think I only used about half of it. I’ll get the remaining balance of the retainer back when this is all over and done with. It’s not that much money for peace of mind and knowing you’re getting a fair shot!

My ex wife was also amicable in the beginning conversations. She didn’t want my retirement, pension, she agreed to 50/50 shared parenting and custody, and she didn’t want child support. But then when the first dissolution papers arrived in my mail, my jaw about his the ground. She wanted half of everything. Nothing at all what we had spoke about and agreed to.

Not saying this will happen to you.. but divorce brings out the worst in people, especially when they see what they “feel entitled to”. Divorce is hard. It makes people behave and think crazy. Get a lawyer to keep you grounded! Speak with other men. But stay away from the sour and bitter men of Reddit. They outnumber the emotionally intelligent ones 10 to 1. Good luck. You’ve got this. Like everything else, this too shall pass.

EmbarrassedAge7612 · 2026-07-21T19:56:46+00:00

At minimum consult a lawyer and get their advice on the best way to move forward. Women who cheat are amicable until it no longer suits them. Be careful when dealing with her.

Disastrous_Rope_5656 · 2026-07-21T19:50:25+00:00

a lot of nasty divorces start off amicable, prepare for the worst, segregate your income from hers (separate account), take half of any savings you have and put it into an account in your name only, valuable or sentimental value property that you want should be made inaccessible to her. Do not hide any assets of any kind. Shop for a lawyer, get free consults if you can. Lawyers are very busy that do divorces. This is a very brief primer. Survive the divorce process first, and worry about your future later. Do not underestimate how childish a woman can be during a divorce. Keep communication minimal, this is not a time to act poorly.

bdkgb · 2026-07-21T19:48:06+00:00

Get a lawyer. That civil crap goes away real quick.

slimypeters · 2026-07-21T19:25:23+00:00

If there aren’t kids involved and if yall could split assets amicably, then you guys could split up with ease.

Reflog1791 · 2026-07-21T19:19:50+00:00

Divorce will be a cakewalk. Real lesson is don’t marry hoes.

Fan_of_Sanity · 2026-07-21T19:11:52+00:00

I don’t have tips for you on the process for your scenario, but wanted to send you good vibes. Sorry this happened; it sucks.

Helpful-Paramedic463 · 2026-07-21T18:58:00+00:00

I dealt with this and just finalized my divorce.

I had a minor child at the time so in my state we had to be separated for 12 months before we could get the divorce decree.

If you don't have kids or a house, the divorce should be easy. You're young enough to not have a retirement to fight over.

You both could probably go to the courthouse and file by yourselves and save some cash.

Title	Advice
Author	Might_Kai11
Upvotes	12
Comments	13
Date	July 21, 2026 6:54 PM UTC (1 week ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1v2rlut/advice/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/advice.1585562 https://theredarchive.com/post/1585562

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