Dating after divorce

Retying3043 · 2026-07-12T00:53:32+00:00

Eh… I don’t understand the pressure to “date.” You’ll be just fine alone if you want to. Otherwise, just do it and stop worrying about it.

Rustic_Father · 2026-07-10T21:19:53+00:00

I totally understand. I'm 40 now and honestly, the biggest mindset that I have for dating was that I have my kids and I am an established person. And the main thing is that I don’t NEED another person to make my life complete. I was only looking for someone who would improve my life. This allowed me to take my time and not be too desperate in my choices.

I’ve been dating a wonderful woman for the last 9 months and I’m so happy that she is in my life.

ExtraLettuce555 · 2026-07-10T17:05:38+00:00

Damn man, I’m in the same boat. I really want to be able to love someone again but need to figure out how to disconnect the feeling of loving someone from the thought of my ex

Extreme_Donut5829 · 2026-07-10T04:28:53+00:00

I’m am your age, just turned 37. Second time divorce finalized in March. Time and dating other women and working on yourself will get you through it

DowntownLife_ · 2026-07-09T12:30:28+00:00

Get over your ex. Of course you’ll love someone again.

Expensive_Sock_9902 · 2026-07-09T11:27:54+00:00

Im 37 now, was 36 when she ended it. We had been together 17 or so years, since we were 19. It's crazy. I also dislike my ex now. She was not a good person throughout the process and has not taken a single ounce of accountability for anything.

I have been on one date, just using Hinge occasionally, but not for anything serious. Just want to meet women and get a coffee for the moment. I am mainly focused on rebuilding and stability for my young daughter.

MonkeyBranchBuster · 2026-07-09T08:01:19+00:00

Yes, you will probably never again love so foolishly as we all did, young love is different. But you will fall in love again, this time with more experience and get your heart broken anyway a few more times.

Try not to hate your ex and move onto indifference, new women don't like when there are strong emotions present about the ex, and it's not good for you either. Hate eats you up inside, leave the hate to her.

That said, dating can be fun, but I don't use the apps so I never got rejected. Suffered low confidence for the last 7 years of my marriage with a semi-dead bedroom then found out plenty of women 10-20 years younger than my ex wife think I'm great. Feels like I was in prison then my mugshot got viral. Good luck and have fun!

Vex_Appeal · 2026-07-09T03:15:45+00:00

Fuck bud, feel pretty similar and same age but she just asked for one last month. Married 4 and together 10.

She just stopped feeling the same and decided it was a good idea to not say anything until asking for a divorce.

I’m not sure how I’m ever gonna love anyone ever again or trust anyone but I’m telling myself it’s possible. I think what you first have to do is work on yourself and find out who you are and what you like.

If you have a good idea of what that is, you might be ready to start dating. There are women out there that you could meet that could make you feel like you did when you first met your wife or even better. Ultimately your marriage failed, and whether it was your fault or not, it had to suck to be a part of it for a while.

I keep telling myself that my wife was so terrible, it’s not gonna be hard to find someone much better. She just love bombed me and kind of railroad me into all sorts of decisions including marriage, and getting a house together. Well, I’m not gonna let her do it in the divorce, but I am trying to delay things so that I can negotiate without feelings for her still.

Edit: if you’re still asking yourself, would this girl make my ex jealous? You’re probably not ready.

BloodstainedBearRug · 2026-07-09T02:47:45+00:00

I just recently started dating after 17 years togher then 8 months separated. I'll say it helps a lot. I've only been out with one girl a few times, but just feeling like you can be appreciated again... makes you think.

SireSweet · 2026-07-09T02:34:32+00:00

Time- it can only dull the pain. Fill your life to get your mind off of it. I’d really recommend just focusing on yourself. Get back to the gym, workout, eat better, focus on bettering your life. Get out of debt and work on your financial health too.

Try casual dating. A man who takes care of himself is sought after. Just don’t take it seriously- go in with the mindset of having fun. Not “I need you to fill my vacant life or I’ll die by myself.”

Women can smell desperation like a shark can taste blood.

rowman_nahledge · 2026-07-09T02:31:03+00:00

Buddy i was with my stbxw for about 17 been 8months since she blew us up. Its been tough as fck. But as somebody who lost everything, time and distraction help the most. As much as i heard go to the gym them fckers were right, it helps. Hang tough brother im hoping for better times ahead. Just dont be sitting around feeling bad cuz sure as shit our exes arent. Kill em with your success.

Title	Dating after divorce
Author	Sundae-Latter
Upvotes	13
Comments	12
Date	July 9, 2026 2:21 AM UTC (4 weeks ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1urd7h9/dating_after_divorce/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/dating-after-divorce.1584579 https://theredarchive.com/post/1584579

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