Just curious - who moved out?

DowntownLife_ · 2025-03-28T13:31:42+00:00

Wife wants me out, she’s was very aggressive about it. She first wanted me to go and live with my 80 year old parents.

She saw a lawyer recently and oddly she’s calmed down on this front. Most likely because the solicitor told her I’m entitled to remain. I am going to delay this divorce and stay for 20 years if I can.

I have no desire to meet other women and have enough going on with my job, travelling and sports so I don’t have to look at her face too often. We also have a very large house of which I have a 1200 sq ft wing to myself. As time goes on I may convert this to an apartment.

I’m staying for two reasons, she never paid a single cent towards the mortgage or the upkeep of the house in 22 years. I’m staying here with my children.

dfb54749014 · 2025-03-27T04:34:58+00:00

So my situation is different than most here. My Ex was the higher earner. She could afford to refinance the house and keep it, I couldn't. Based on our income discrepancy, I couldn't just move out. I needed her to pay me my equity in the house to afford someplace to live. So I remained living in the house with her through the divorce process.

DuePersonality8585 · 2025-03-26T22:34:48+00:00

Talk to a lawyer first. Is the house in both of your names? Do you have the ability to buy out her share of the equity and assume the mortgage (assuming there is one)? If it’s in your name you might be able to get away with packing her a suitcase and changing the locks

Evari · 2025-03-26T22:24:03+00:00

7 months since she said she wanted a divorce. She’s still in the spare room. House is solely in my name so I’m not going anywhere.

It’s awkward as hell and I do not recommend. We’re mainly sticking to our old routine, communicating via text when it’s absolutely necessary. I think we’ve made eye contact twice since Christmas.

Totally a healthy environment for the kids!

Expert-Raccoon6097 · 2025-03-26T17:17:26+00:00

My ex wife wanted out of the marriage. I asked her to leave the marital home and she did. Kids stayed with me in the family home. The spouse who wants to leave should be the one to go, the only exception being if there is abuse.

But what is right and what the law allows for are two completely different things.

Helpful-Paramedic463 · 2025-03-26T12:52:12+00:00

My wife is moving out. She said she wanted to be alone so I used that against her. She also cheated. She moves out next week. Kids stay with me.

I told her there's no way in hell she'd stay in the house with my kids and have random dudes over. Never. She chose to get an apartment so she could be her true self and sleep with whoever she wants.

upvotersfortruth · 2025-03-26T09:51:43+00:00

You're going to have "the talk" before filing? Bad move. If you have "the talk" at all, you need to have backed it up with action. Unless you don't want the divorce or will consider reconciling, in which case you're using the threat of a divorce as leverage.

ExaminationKlutzy194 · 2025-03-26T09:40:55+00:00

If you don’t have kids it may be a push unless you think she will trash the place.

If you have kids, or think she will trash the place, then stay.

My ex tried to get me to move. I left for 3 days and went back. She eventually moved. It was the right decision.

Reflog1791 · 2025-03-26T09:36:09+00:00

We had a pos starter home that I saved up and bought. Very common my income 3x was our money and her income 1x was her money. It’s silly but everyone is doing this. We had one toddler.

Even after paying for divorce itself and child support I got a fat discount on my cash flow just getting her off my account.

I moved out and lived right for 18 months. It was tight paying for housing for my apartment and my old house probably 80% of my budget just gone.

Made that remaining 20% go a long way even played 150 rounds of golf.

But it paid off I got an equity check which included the rise in value even though I didn’t live there. Since I was paying for the vast majority of it that only makes sense but that is indeed exactly how it went down.

5 years later I’m back on top and go on vacations of my choosing for the first time in my entire life. Didn’t even get much of a raise in that time. It would not have happened if I didn’t get rid of cheating spendthrift ex wife.

Title	Just curious - who moved out?
Author	WearyTraveller9120
Upvotes	4
Comments	11
Date	March 26, 2025 9:19 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1jk7nm6/just_curious_who_moved_out/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/just-curious-who-moved-out.1547669 https://theredarchive.com/post/1547669

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