Wife and I were together for 13+ years. Four kids. Went from let’s do this amiably to her hiring a demon of an attorney team. She filed a protective order and child abuse case the same week. We went into initial hearing with all of that over my head along with her wanting 12k per month in alimony and child support. This was in march. The worst fight we ever had was when I set up my business accounts 3 years ago and she wasn’t on them. She wanted no part of the business but, because of her raging fit, I put her on the accounts. In a little over a year she had pulled out about a quarter million out of my business leaving me staggering to make payrolls and keep the doors open. When I saw 12k per month in demands I quit. I let go of my teams and went through 90 days of severe depression. I struggled with alcohol but im now sober. Since that initial hearing the da threw out the protective order, cps investigated and threw out the case and dismissed her allegations. The judge that granted her everything has yet to give me any custody outside of 4 hours per month in supervised visitation. I’ve been trying to stay positive, but I just don’t know what to do. The end of my business was so embarrassing and disheartening that I just can’t get back into the same industry. Im working an entry level job at 42. I told myself once this divorce is settled I’ll work on my next endeavor but she’s now dragging her feet through this process. I’ve considered writing off my kids and moving far away to just start over where I don’t have to run into or deal with anyone that has heard her bs. I’ve had the pastor of our large church (that I was heavily involved with) call me to have me explain her allegations. She’s blasted me on fb. She’s just a very angry and grudgingly mean person and I struggle everyday to find a way to live without my kids and keep moving forward. I’m not doing too great at that presently. Any thought of input would be greatly appreciated.

I feel that I could deal with the divorce but loss of divorce, business, and network and friends all at once left in a hotel room ready to end my life. While I’m not there mentally anymore, it’s daunting to think of starting over completely with EVERYTHING.