Everyone,

I'm an idiot. wife and I are separated, living in the same house. Just overheard my wife coaching my children that "He's (me) is not supposed to stay in the house", and they "they" (the children, 10/13) need to ask me to leave the house... for her "safety". That she's scared and can't do anything. I recorded the entire conversation, and prior to this moment, I had really been struggling with contacting the lawyer and initiating the divorce process. We have been living in separate bedrooms since May, and sort of just been co-existing for the sake of the children. She even told our oldest child that she is "free to stay" in the house, if that's her choice, and she will take our youngest and go someplace else. what the actual fuck? There's no basis for these scare tactics. She also apparanetly has a therapist (prior has openly refused any therapy), and has informed that person that I'm the narcissist - DARVO in the works here. I love this. just to the letter of what everyone here has described. it's not going to be pleasant. I'm not leaving my house. if she's so scared, let her get a restraining order. it's been 4 months of her being so oppressed... I'd like to see the "evidence" she thinks will convince the courts at this point to issue one. FML seriously. For anyone waiting around, like me, seeing how "things" go... learn from me... don't do it. just pull the trigger and get on with it.

[EDIT] I encourage eeryone here to DOCUMENT everything. I did not follow this advice very well, and I so so so so regret it now. it doesn't take very much effort. create a document, make a timeline, write shit down in the moment, or as soon as possible.

[EDIT 2]: first time in my life experiencing a anxiety/panic attack. that shit is real!