The future as it would have been

Hour-Jellyfish-7205 · 2025-03-10T04:29:20+00:00

This absolutely breaks my heart. I feel the same about my ex father in law. He is a good man broken by too many mouths and too many expectations. I always felt that he was exactly the kind of man I wished to be and after the divorce, I realized that not having kids with my ex was a blessing and that I had dodged a fate like his.

Sea_Employment4100 · 2025-02-27T02:38:24+00:00

My family is grateful that my marriage ended before it was too late. Had it continued, my ex would have drained every ounce of authenticity from me, reducing me to a shell of myself. In hindsight, her discarding me was a blessing in disguise. Her father— a man severely broken by years of abuse, numbed by heavy antidepressants just to function—served as a grim preview of what my future could have been. The thought alone sends shivers down my spine.

AKA_Wildcard · 2025-02-23T06:54:14+00:00

I have a good one for you. I celebrated my daughter’s birthday a few years ago at my ex’s house and my ex’s in laws showed up. I’d known these people for over 20 years, over half of my life before the divorce a few years prior. Few words were spoken between us as I tried to remain friendly. My ex’s boyfriend shows up. He’s a decade older than her and one of my former work colleagues. They begin chatting like they’ve known each other for years. Moral of the story, leave the past where it belongs and remember that your reasons for leaving were more then warranted.

zvekl · 2025-02-23T00:20:15+00:00

One thing that triggered my ex the most when we were still together was saying "don't treat me like your dad. " She never tried to even understand what I meant but would just got ballistic and storm off. I always felt that she and her mother would treat her dad like he was crazy or talk to him condescendingly or just quite curt and in an annoyed tone of voice.

I did not want that. I do get sad at times seeing it's all gone but thank God I'm not treated like that

Reflog1791 · 2025-02-23T00:10:56+00:00

I’m 5 years out and everybody can sit at an event and talk beforehand and keep it civil. 2 years ago I would have thought not possible.

My trick is just smile at your kid and don’t get triggered.

Diabolus-Optima · 2025-02-23T00:09:52+00:00

I know the feeling.

The men in my stbxw family walked around like neutered dogs or like trained cats. Masculinity on demand but hide it and stuff it deep inside when it's inconvenient. I don't mean to rant. Seems you know what time it is o.o

Best of luck brother

Particular_Act7478 · 2025-02-23T00:06:10+00:00

He chose to stay on the plantation of hell

NewDay0110 · 2025-02-22T23:57:58+00:00

That guy's a loser who can't stand up for himself if he's bossed around by his family like that. That explains a lot.

Disastrous_Age_1493 · 2025-02-22T23:50:00+00:00

Be glad you avoided it, don’t make the same mistake again

Title	The future as it would have been
Author	Zealousideal_Try_864
Upvotes	52
Comments	22
Date	February 22, 2025 11:33 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1ivw9mb/the_future_as_it_would_have_been/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/the-future-as-it-would-have-been.1544654 https://theredarchive.com/post/1544654

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