This is also kind of a rant I guess.

It’s just all these things going on. Trying to find an apartment, living in an AirBnB the last couple of weeks, and starting a new job tomorrow.

She was my only friend because I didn’t make time for anyone besides my family. My only other family besides her and the kids are 1600 miles away. I obviously can’t talk to her and she has my kids convinced I’m some sort of monster. I don’t even have my dog till I can get settled.

I’m fucking losing it, I’m trying my best to compartmentalize it all and tackle these problems one at a time.

But it’s the support, or lack of, I feel like I’ve really pushed the amount I am talking about this with other family on the phone and don’t wanna come across as needy or some sort of pity party. These other life things are hard enough, but this bullshit is the hardest thing I’ve ever done and I’ve been in two wars and lost multiple friends. I feel abandoned, alone, and I just want it to all stop.