Choose you every time!

plummyjellyfish · 2020-12-30T05:34:38+00:00

Hell yes. Story time - my maternal grandfather was by all accounts a terrible man. He was an abusive alcoholic who terrorised my aunt and uncles and frequented prostitutes, even going so far as to bring these women back to the house! He died in a car accident when my mother was only 1 year old. After that, my grandma refused every single suitor that came her way. Been there, done that! She focused on raising her children, discovering spirituality, making lots of friends and developing lots of new hobbies. Growing up, she was adamant that I try to master as many skills as possible so as to never rely on anyone else. She was also insistent that if I ever deigned to choose a man that he prove his worth monetarily, morally and emotionally.

-captainhook · 2020-12-30T06:53:46+00:00

Women have always wanted the option to have their own freedom and have always known about the ways of the vast, vast majority of men. Even a lot of pickmes realize it in time when they’re stuck in miserable relationships (if you can call them that). The difference is that older generations didn’t have autonomy or any means to survive without men.

When men tell you that there are no more good women or that you should be like older generations of women, they’re telling you they wish they could control you, take your autonomy, and make you dependent on them. It’s that simple

Hostileovaries · 2020-12-30T06:37:18+00:00

When my grandmother found out I was on birth control and in college, she told me to never have kids and focus on myself. She was the perfect housewife and mother and she said to never have children if I could. Lol at guys who think I should "be like my grandmothers"

katthekanuck · 2020-12-30T06:01:02+00:00

Sadly my paternal grandmother had some bad internalized misogyny, (partly her cultural background and partly because she was a very good Catholic 🙄)and despite being financially comfortable even after my grandfather died early, she entertained my father way too much. My maternal grandmother was more assertive in some ways but even she put up with stuff that I never would now.

Confident-Coconut-58 · 2020-12-30T09:58:12+00:00

Yep mine had a good marriage and loving husband and children. Yet her life was 100% domestic child & housecare. Even with domestic help it was still all encompassing. Her only piece of advice to me? "Don't waste your life in a kitchen".

gosamadhi · 2020-12-30T13:21:28+00:00

My paternal grandmother had an alcoholic husband who often displayed aggressiveness, they had 3 sons. She never went to school, learned to read and write by herself, also sang and wrote simple poems.
To the point: She was very feminine, always had her hair done and a lipstick and had a bunch of suitors throughout the years. I asked her why doesn't she want to marry again or pick one guy to have by her side and she said "They only want one thing". She chose to be lonely rather than to have a man.
I wish I listened to her but I was like 14 back then. Also, she regretted to not marry the doctor that was after her when she was younger, at least she would have a nice life because what she chose wasn't good anyway

seraphinelysion · 2020-12-30T15:39:03+00:00

It really makes you wonder though. If women of older generations were so great (read: submissive, docile, subservient) and they were so happy to be married, why did they fight so hard to be free of such an "easy life"? Men love to romanticize the 50's housewife, thinking that was the ideal marriage to strive for, but they know nothing of the reality of what it was like for them. They keep saying women have it easy. They know nothing.

boredbitch2020 · 2020-12-30T16:05:32+00:00

My grandmother (married atleast 65 years when they died) told me to go to college (she had no way of anticipating the student loan debt crises) , and if she could have, she would have done that instead of marrying, but that's just what women did back in those days.

Males dont realize the women who they want us to be like, are telling us to make entirely different chooces than them

history68 · 2020-12-30T16:57:15+00:00

These men bring nothing to the table besides termites and then wonder why we would rather be alone.

Title	Choose you every time!
Author	stateofhigihaga
Upvotes	801
Comments	25
Date	December 30, 2020 4:26 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/kmuxf0/choose_you_every_time/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/choose-you-every-time.340152 https://theredarchive.com/post/340152

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