I hope we all throw away our toxic exes/present partners and look forward to a brighter future where we are successful and have a hvm on the side

outside-perception · 2020-06-19T18:34:15+00:00

Found mine ❤️

Damn lucky too. This is what LVM fear -- when you realise your worth and the right one happens.

BlueJeanMistress · 2020-06-19T19:03:49+00:00

This couldn’t be more true. Before I met my husband I had two previous boyfriends. The biggest thing that both of them had in common is that they put their needs/wants first and were stubborn when it came to their needs/wants. Looking back I see how I was always willing to go along with it because I wanted to appear “easy going” and not make a fuss.

Fast forward to now-my husband always considers my needs/wants first. Asks for my opinion on things and absolutely adores me. He lives by the motto: “happy wife, happy life”. Once I was with him it was so clear how crappy my past two relationships were. And because he’s so considerate I love doing things to make him happy as well so it’s an equal relationship Makes me appreciate him/ love him so much!

masalamermaid · 2020-06-19T21:20:44+00:00

I really like the message of processing old, toxic relationships fully and healing and taking the lessons you learned from older relationships forward.

But I think this fairytale promise of finding a perfect guy/hvm may or may not happen for a lot of women.

Loving yourself and prioritizing your self respect above everything, even your emotions is what will allow you to cultivate a happy life.

And while it would be great to find a HVM, it's not a guarantee nor a requirement. It's always better to be single than with an LVM or NVM. And that's what makes them most angry. Women can and do choose being single over being with their crusty dusty asses.

2020-06-19T19:31:26+00:00

I feel really lucky to have found mine, after a very shitty marriage. He is just so good to me. And values me. Whenever I tell him this he says the same thing “this is how it’s supposed to be!” Several times my daughter’s friends have said “your mom’s boyfriend is so nice to her!” and while it’s awesome they notice, it makes me think they don’t expect to be treated so well :-(

Incredible_Alligator · 2020-06-19T18:56:51+00:00

I think there's statistically only 1 HVM for every 1000 HVW out there though. So by these chances, it's kind of like winning a lottery to try and find one in the wild.

girludontbringhome · 2020-06-19T21:05:06+00:00

Finally I blocked both of my exes to try to leave the past behind. My recent one I had no feelings for, but I had deleted his contact before blocking so I had to dig to find his number again so I could actually have him blocked (to get rid of any chance of him contacting me). The first ex has always been so hard for me to block, he has been contacting me constantly since the break up 2 years ago, only stopping a month ago when I sent him a rude message. I assumed he blocked me, but I just didn’t want to take any chances so today I dug through my phone and blocked him as well.

It was very hard to block him, I actually blocked him, then unblocked him, and then blocked him again today. He always portrayed our door as being half open, that one day we could get back together, and as someone who was deeply in love with him it’s been a very hard thing for me to accept that we will never be together again (1. Because he’s really not that into me and uses me for an ego boost 2. Because I follow FDS now, once we’ve broken up we’re done). He’s really not a HVM guy at all, but idk why I always have these feelings for him.

I think the next step is to unfriend his friend group, unfortunately many of these people I went to middle and high school with and I have known them before I’ve met him. One of the girls is a family friend of mine that I still see sometimes. But all of his friends always post pics with him and I’m just terrified that one day there will be a pic with a new girl in it that he’ll have his arm around, and I want to avoid being hurt like that. I just have not had the strength to unfriend his friends yet, I guess it’s because I really liked them when we all did hang out.

Sigh I just feel haunted everyday by the mistreatment I received from both exes. I just want to stop feeling like this all the time. I don’t mind being single and I don’t even think I’ll end up with anyone anyway, I just want to stop thinking about the past.

ItsYesMaam2u · 2020-06-19T18:55:38+00:00

Thanks for this. I needed to hear this today!

Owl-right · 2020-06-20T05:28:46+00:00

Yes to this! I've been sick in bed for two days and my bf has been taking care of me with such care and love. In the past, my ex would forbid me to be sick or show any negative emotion as it brought down his mood. He never showed any consideration for my well-being, but expected 110% for his. Now, here I have this wonderful human checking in on me every half an hour, running to the shops for anything I need, fixing my blankets and pillows, sleeping next to me and telling me how much I'm loved and if anything ever happened to me, he would always look after me. Don't 👏 settle 👏

Simsira10 · 2020-06-19T23:12:12+00:00

I hope so, I'm so lonely 😭. Tired of dealing with online dating and men who don't put in any effort.

afrodeasyak · 2020-06-20T06:32:39+00:00

Definitely not settling, ever. Learned my lessons, healed my wounds and I know exactly what I deserve. However, I'd be lying if I said I'm looking, waiting or hoping to find a man.

GlassesForSale · 2020-06-19T22:28:43+00:00

[deleted]

GlassesForSale · 2020-06-19T21:47:38+00:00

Posts like these are pretty gross, because they still condition women into believing they HAVE to find a partner. When in reality, a lot of women are at their happiest when single. Enjoy your single life and be grateful everyday that you don't have to deal with men as romantic partners because let's be honest, most of them are conditioned from a very early age to be pretty useless in relationships and not only offer you nothing but also expect everything from you and in worst case scenarios abuse you or try to control you one way or another. Not saying all of them are shit, but come on yall KNOW that the odds of finding a man that this post promises are zero to none. And that's OK. Work on yourself. Take care of yourself. Get a pet. Fall in love with YOURSELF. WORSHIP THE GROUND YOU WALK ON. PUT YOUR OWN ROCK ON YOUR HAND. PUT YOUR OWN CROWN ON YOUR HEAD.

Title	I hope we all throw away our toxic exes/present partners and look forward to a brighter future where we are successful and have a hvm on the side
Author	ishika_23
Upvotes	454
Comments	24
Date	June 19, 2020 4:28 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/hc3sfm/i_hope_we_all_throw_away_our_toxic_exespresent/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/i-hope-we-all-throw-away-our-toxic-exespresent.696336 https://theredarchive.com/post/696336

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