It’s a no from me

AwkwardDisaster4150 · 2020-12-18T19:50:31+00:00

If he’s not sure after 5 years, it’s a no. Really two years in you should know. Definitely time to move on.

I wish there were some way to make every woman understand, at as young an age as possible, that men will lead you on for as long as they can get away with, with no plans to ever marry you. I think most women won’t do this- they think of an LTR as building a future with someone, and that it’s eventually going to lead to marriage because otherwise what’s the point? But men don’t think of it that way and are happy to waste all of your time that you will let them waste. He thinks they’re “perfect where they are” with him getting a live-in bangmaid and her getting no commitment- of course he does. This is a great deal for him because he gets steady sex without ever having to grow up.

bigchinchilla · 2020-12-18T19:55:20+00:00

Oh my! I was just reading this thread. The second hand embarrassment I feel for her! In the comments she says they have kids together which just makes it even more embarrassing. That's why we should never propose to men or give men children before vetting, vetting and vetting again.

Edit: Correction: They don't have kids they just discussed having kids. With no kids in the picture, she should leave him NOW. She shouldn't waste one more second with this guy. He clearly doesn't want to marry her and would happily waste as much of her time as it takes for him to find someone he does want to marry.

I sincerely hope this is the wake up call she needs.

giftofnocondemnation · 2020-12-18T19:52:47+00:00

A man will waste years of your life and not give it a second thought. All that sentimental stuff means nothing to them. I don't think they have emotional attachments. If you serve his needs he will keep you around, like a car that runs good, they keep that too. Until they get a newer model with less milage that doesn't yet know he's an asshole.

husheveryone · 2020-12-18T19:47:14+00:00

Most of us should never, ever marry the boy we dated when we were 20. And obviously no self-respecting woman would ever propose to a man who had been using her for half a damn decade and was so PAINFULLY not in love with her.

AverageToHot · 2020-12-18T21:36:28+00:00

Men have no shame in using women at all. They also don’t appreciate anything that you do for them.

AmazonArtemis · 2020-12-18T19:57:30+00:00

Cringing but I also kind of pity her :/

GlitterMars · 2020-12-18T22:37:18+00:00

My heart goes out to her. She's probably someone who loves and trusts deeply and loves to put actual effort into her relationships. She needs someone who appreciates her efforts and reciprocates them. Unfortunately it sounds like she's in too deep and it's going to take a lot more for her to cut ties with this absolutely undeserving man. She needs to find her crown and I hope she will. She's wasting her youth, her emotional energy and love on this man.

souredskittles · 2020-12-18T23:10:31+00:00

I kind of loved the idea that pickmes were proposing to their lvms. At least they find out sooner that their men don’t want them instead of waiting 7+ years.

CuriousBubbleMilkTea · 2020-12-18T21:48:07+00:00

I hope this is a rescue mission?

Waste-Win · 2020-12-18T20:01:16+00:00

Considering?

sleeping_pretty · 2020-12-18T21:19:14+00:00

You know...I thought I was going to be shook. Like "omg, how dare he?!" But he really gave her every sign needed that he doesn't want to marry her and she still thought it meant she needed to propose. It's obvious who is running this relationship and who is just there for the ride.

Mysterious_Midnight7 · 2020-12-18T23:20:14+00:00

I can't understand what would possess a woman to believe doing something like this is "cute". Are there messages out in the media about this that I've just never seen? I find it truly mind blowing.

tiavarga · 2020-12-19T02:29:15+00:00

Oh hell no. If he doesn’t ask within 1.5 years, he’s never going to.

hgd29 · 2020-12-18T19:56:24+00:00

"We both agreed getting married at a good time in our life would be the ideal and that we didn't want to wait long" - I hope this was just a summary of their discussion, because there was zero commitment in these words .

If he doesn't give you a detailed and realistic timeline of his plans for the future, then it's likely you aren't in them.

2020-12-19T14:43:22+00:00

Sometimes a woman’s greatest danger is her decision making

Title	It’s a no from me
Author	htownbaddie
Upvotes	158
Comments	23
Date	December 18, 2020 7:35 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/kfrz6b/its_a_no_from_me/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/its-a-no-from-me.753055 https://theredarchive.com/post/753055

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