Not suprised.

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yggiwtmiih · 2022-03-24T04:30:10+00:00

It can be stomach churning to realize what the men around you actually think. I work almost entirely with men and have quietly smiled my way into being "one of the cool women." They joke about cheating on their wives, joke about stereotypes, I've heard a man who I thought was more upstanding very offhandedly call a woman who was simply "not warm" a bitch.

I've also become friendly with a group of younger men (early 20s) at my job, and every once in a while they make misogynistic jokes or talk about the women they're 'dating' like objects. Once I had to leave and walk off my shock because they said something so dehumanizing. I forget what it was but I guess I'm blocking it out.

I try to stay under the radar because I think it's important for me to remember how many men really have those thought processes. I've had a bad habit of projecting my humanity onto men before, and to be a "fly on the wall" when they think no one's listening gives me the harsh reality check I need to keep my boundaries high and myself safe whenever I interact with men.

It's so telling that this keeps getting down voted but this post already has over 30 comments with 100 to 200 upvotes. They don't like it when they're exposed.

KitKat1705 · 2022-03-23T21:20:46+00:00

Sat next to two guys in Uni once. One was actually my crush (Ewwwww). They commented on all the girls body parts, from head to toe. Disgusting. I think they knew I could hear them but they did not care.

2022-03-24T05:24:30+00:00

As a feminine bisexual, I get more gay by the day simply witnessing the actions of straight men.

itsirrelevant · 2022-03-23T21:07:56+00:00

I grew up with a lot of male friends and in mixed friend groups and, yeah, learned very early on how shifty dirty and hateful males are to females.

I spent my time with them really listening to what terrible things they would say and understanding the universal negative attitude towards women.

Knowing the truth has 100% colored my perspective on men and dating. I've always known more likely than not I will be interacting with someone who doesn't really see me as human the way he considers himself to be.

OutlandishnessOk · 2022-03-23T20:01:26+00:00

So when we meet a man and we vet forever and see no evidence of this, are we assuming it's still there and just we'll hidden or never spoken out loud? Cuz I'm getting to the point where I'm assuming the best ones are just not rating 17 year olds out loud even with guy friends, but they're doing it in their head and are just able to keep it to themselves and not fixate.

Xidig6 · 2022-03-24T14:27:45+00:00

She’s right, most of these men hate women and use women for their own selfish needs or to get approval from other men. They center themselves or their own gender.

Women on the other hand are usually taught to not center themselves and to align with male interests. Societal conditioning is sick and hates women.

thisisausernameee23 · 2022-03-23T23:45:08+00:00

The grossest men think they're the best prize.

SayNad · 2022-03-23T20:15:44+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Christleey · 2022-03-24T11:35:31+00:00

Men are so revolting. A cousin of mine and his LV friends were talking about how female Ukrainian refugees coming in are “more pussy for them”.

Told him off and he’s gaslighting me smh. Just decided to go silent on him.

Imaginary-Revenue-81 · 2022-03-24T03:45:13+00:00

I was friends with an older guy who I saw as a dad figure but things went downhill when he started asking for dating advice. Even at 60, his sequence of discussing the women he went on dates with was how pretty her face was, how slim/fit her body was, how horny he thought she was. He hit on 10 different women in our extended friend group. I eventually just stopped responding to him because I realized he didn't see women as women. Just objects, even at his big age.

Swiftie107 · 2022-03-24T12:03:34+00:00

Saw this and I was wondering when someone would share it in here. I’ve heard so many disgusting details about mens sexual habits and been informed of several rapes while them bragging it’s insane I was ofcourse only 16 and it scared the shit out of me so I didn’t say anything and I regret it to this day cuz later on not only i but a few friends of mine got raped by the same people none of us were brave enough to say anything now I snitch at any opportunity i get.

Noemie_Mathilde · 2022-03-24T10:53:23+00:00

She's a legend 💗 true FDS spirit

Jay-Qualin · 2022-03-23T20:22:59+00:00

Men are such deranged vile creatures...no wonder our world is fucked up and full of chaos...those creatures are the ones ruling it after all...so of course it is the way it is.

AnnoyinglyHappy_ · 2022-03-24T06:08:34+00:00

Yet, they'll beg you for sex but then they go back then they'll go tell their buddies these lies to make themselves feel better for being weak.

slayeroftruth · 2022-03-24T04:09:49+00:00

When are men ever going to realize that they can and have permission to lead an all male-exclusive separatist lifestyle away from us? When are men ever going to realize that we don't need them? When are men ever going to realize that they can lead full, happy lives all by themselves, and just be with their fellow men in communities far away from other women?

I think this is why, despite many of us desiring love and relationships, that heterosexuality has been called into question and heavily criticized by feminists, especially radical feminists, because of how much men hate women. Men sing until they're blue in the face that women need men, but they act like they can't stand feeling needed or wanted by us. The only thing that heterosexuality and heterosexual behavior can do is reproduction, and even that is being tested against by science via artificial insemination, bone marrow babies, etc.

I sincerely believe that there should be a generation or two of absolute and total separation between the sexes. There should be four areas in the world: Countries that only has men in it, countries that only has women in it, countries where it can be used temporarily for men and women to actively seek out a lifelong partner, and then countries where married people can peacefully live together. But this is extreme and not going to happen, but damn, I can only dream.

GoGoCaterpillar · 2022-03-24T04:42:46+00:00

Just hearing the way men talk and seeing the way they act "behind the scenes" (so-to-speak, as in with other men) really makes me worried about the absolutely vile things they really do when no one is watching.

BathbeautyXO · 2022-03-24T00:28:42+00:00

Ugh, what horrific convos she had to overhear. She’s doing the lord’s work out there warning other girls. Gay/straight/bi, love seeing women looking out for other women! 💕

BlackberrySlow7517 · 2022-03-24T00:56:54+00:00

the things guys say and ask you the second women walk away and they think bc im into women that makes me a sex crazed creep. is mind blowing. happens every single time.

cottoncandypinky · 2022-03-24T02:37:28+00:00

Church boys teenage boys would meet every Friday for church at home. One of those guys had a little brother one time I baby sat him and he told me that one of those guys drew magazines. He drew the teenage girls of the church naked. And told stories of us naked. He said that I was drawn there as well. This little boy knew it was wrong, his two brothers one which was my classmate (my age) and the other one was my older brother’s friend (3 years older than me) were pet of this group. This broke my 15 year old heart. They were my “friends” and no one told me or the other girl what that guy was drawing about us. The guy that made the drawings wasn’t even bad looking on the contrary; one of the guys that wanted more than our purity promise teenager girls could give. Till this day I’ve never told anyone. 🥺

2022-03-24T13:26:36+00:00

As depressing as this video is, I still think there are HVM who actively participate in the dismantling of the patriarchy, those who have great relationships with their mothers and sisters, and who are emotionally mature and have more things to talk about with friends than rating women. I think this is particularly prevalent behavior in lower paying, service jobs, blue collar jobs, and male dominated industries. And of course younger men.

Having a mom who is a professor has exposed me to her friends and colleagues who have phd’s and teach young college aged women who absolutely do not think this way about their students, do not have these kinds of friends or colleagues, have interesting lives that don’t revolve around fantasizing about sex, and who publish criticisms of our culture in journals.

I think you need to raise the bar for education, success, and intelligence and this kind of thinking fades into the minority. There are a lot of men capable of intellectual thought and who are intelligent enough to see through the social conditioning. This is the reason to demand a college degree or two- partially because it exposes men to critical thinking. It’s not fool proof, just one of the many things to look out for.

normaldiscounts · 2022-03-23T21:37:04+00:00

This actually terrifies me. My boyfriend of 3 years is a really sweet respectful progressive guy but his friends are all either hype beast bros, Jordan Peterson/Joe Rogan viewers, or unmarried tradesbros from his work. He doesn’t see them that often and also doesn’t hang out with them around me often and I suspect it’s because they talk about women like this. I’ve asked him if he ever says shit about me and he said no, and I believe him. But still 😬

Title	Not suprised.
Author	cat_lio
Upvotes	1066
Comments	58
Date	March 23, 2022 7:43 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/tla3y8/not_suprised/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/not-suprised.1210400 https://theredarchive.com/post/1210400

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