The last five dates I've had have had the same theme - the men aren't listening, but waiting to talk.

2020-11-07T18:48:01+00:00

[deleted]

MarchesaCasati · 2020-11-07T18:28:16+00:00

They just want to sleep with you and have you mirror back to them what they already believe about themselves. And punish you if you fail to do either of the two. And also punish you if you succeed. The end.

OutlandishnessTiny14 · 2020-11-07T19:00:44+00:00

Can confirm - not a new thing. Gave up with dating online and irl for this exact reason. It was relentless. Could not cope with that in addition to the oneupmanship.

secularwitch · 2020-11-07T19:26:48+00:00

Yeah, true. I test them in the first 15 minutes and see if they are asking me questions too. If not, I check my phone and pretend I am writing to a friend (without hitting the send button) and say "Oh, shoot! My best friend has come to my place to surprise me and I am not home, I gotta go now." Then I just ghost them.

seadragon6 · 2020-11-07T22:09:10+00:00

I’ve noticed it too. Even the “good” guys are like this.

mtan15 · 2020-11-08T00:24:35+00:00

It's just as bad as continually talking over you. It really triggers me into being irrate. I'm much better at standing up to it now. Men suck

Villanelloh · 2020-11-07T22:29:23+00:00

"And then I went a cafe and got myself a coffee and then I went to the park etc" Its like listening to a small child talking about what they did at the weekend. At least kids are cute when they do it

woadsky · 2020-11-08T06:54:35+00:00

I'm older and I've noticed this my whole dating life. I think it's unusual to meet a man who listens well. Somewhere I read that statistically men talk the most on the third date -- they are trying to "sell themselves" by talking about themselves. For me it is a total turnoff.

Misswinter69 · 2020-11-08T13:41:14+00:00

I thinks it's were vetting pre date is super important.

Usually can spot these guys from a mile of over text. When you first start chatting to someone and have exchanged 5/6 message have a look over. Who is doing the questions? Whose making the effort.

Are they answering all the questions and not asking anything about you. Are you having to try carry the conversation.

I unmatched a lot of people who by the 5/6 message hadn't even asked anything about me. I'm also kinda half arsed at first, I want to weed out the lazy ones and I'm not willing to put in effort unless someone shows me that they are worth my time and emotions.

eaucitron · 2020-11-08T15:53:19+00:00

Yup and they have no questions about you, your life, goals, etc. They just want to hear themselves speak and for you to reaffirm their own delusions.

Title	The last five dates I've had have had the same theme - the men aren't listening, but waiting to talk.
Author	chaostrulyreigns
Upvotes	343
Comments	28
Date	November 7, 2020 4:48 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/jpu4l4/the_last_five_dates_ive_had_have_had_the_same/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/the-last-five-dates-ive-had-have-had-the-same.736812 https://theredarchive.com/post/736812

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