Why do I do this to myself?

DivineHag · 2020-05-29T04:17:49+00:00

You really need to raise your standards - those aren't just red flags, they are huge neon signs flashing LOSER

Scaredycat2019 · 2020-05-29T05:34:35+00:00

Your other mistake is texting paragraphs. LVM literally do not give a shit. If he had wanted to make time for you, he would have. Letting him know that he got under your skin just gives him more power.

SpecificPatience8 · 2020-05-29T04:54:13+00:00

Please read the handbooks!

gursky0 · 2020-05-29T05:13:03+00:00

It sounds like the best thing for you would be to take a break from dating while you work on yourself, on loving yourself and building your self esteem. Also do some introspection to figure out what you want and don't want in dating/a relationship (and don't compromise on this later). If you venture into dating with low self esteem and no boundaries, you get eaten alive. You'll only find yourself in more frustrating situations with men who just want to use you.

shade-of-daisy · 2020-05-29T05:00:11+00:00

I get what you were saying. Loneliness got you because I have no doubt you saw those neon signs.

I literally did the same thing. He was building a house...to live with his parents. He also had 4...count em 4 vehicles with definitely no paycheck to match. It only took me date three...2 weeks to say later.

I understand the slippery slope loneliness sends us on. But just like anything else we use out there to fill that void...perhaps acknowledge it. Then re-read this sub💛

veruscka · 2020-05-29T05:26:23+00:00

You’re not stupid. This guy really doesn’t sound like he’s in a good place and he needs to figure some important (but basic) “life stuff”. I would ask myself why I would feel attracted to someone like that and if he embodied patterns that felt familiar to me somehow. Not saying you necessarily had a turbulent childhood. But sometimes abusive family dynamics can make us lean into unbalanced relationships as adults. Glad you got out!

letsberealforamoment · 2020-05-29T13:02:48+00:00

I stopped reading at "alcoholic".

Don't date them. Ever. Run far away if yhey say they are "sober now". I'm divorced from one. Their drinking wrecks their dicks, and it wrecks their brain. When he forgot about your plans it's prob because he was halfway thru a handle.

With addicts, their substance always comes first, before foods water their health. They are irredeemably selfish. You will never be a priority.

2020-05-29T06:08:35+00:00

Don't beat yourself up too much, we all make mistakes and have people that we regretted giving too much time and power in our lives. The important part is that you realize you deserve better now and are willing to stick to that belief. Focus on what you want to do better next time and what you will no longer accept, rather than insulting yourself or dwelling.

DoeEyedBrownSkin · 2020-05-29T10:42:46+00:00

Let’s be honest, he wasn’t with a male friend. He was with another woman. Guys just don’t forget to check their phones especially when a woman/potential sex is involved.

Glad you learned. This hurt to read.

VikingPug · 2020-05-29T04:47:49+00:00

It’s good you learned your lesson. When red flags present themselves you walk away. You block. Don’t bother explaining. But I really think you have some work to do on loving yourself before you go out dating again.

throwawayitst · 2020-05-29T05:12:51+00:00

Yuck omg

2020-05-29T07:43:10+00:00

I wasted 9 months with a guy who sounded just like this. It’s 9 months post breakup and my self esteem couldn’t be any lower. Good for you for leaving and not looking back

Geocities_SEO_Expert · 2020-05-29T16:13:35+00:00

Don't beat yourself up too much over it, we all have to learn sometime.

It's ironic that men bitch about women being harsh and demanding, but almost every woman was made that way by a man. And the same ones who complain the most are the ones who cause the most problems in the first place.

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