This is a continuation of this post: Why you should NEVER go 50/50 (Part 1)

This time I'll be focusing on arguments most commonly used by women who struggle with insecurity and low self-esteem.

4) "He is far more attractive than me and I'm afraid to lose him!"

  • Firstly, remember the FDS mantra "dick is abundant and low value"
  • Secondly, if he asked you out on a date, that means you are attractive to him. Unless you are the one asking him out which we already covered in part one - DO NOT ASK A MAN OUT.
  • Thirdly, attractive men are still men - ultimately we will provide more to the relationship down the line and if you end up getting saddled with a lazy jobless useless narcissist manchild who suck the life out of you, that handsome face and good sex won't mean shit.
  • Similarly, a High Value handsome man despise 50/50 just like any other HVM. Again, men have ego and HVM control that ego in a healthy way - he wants to prove himself to you by making sure you are impressed by his efforts on the date. Do you not want to be spoiled and catered to on a date with a gorgeous man? Going 50/50 will not only damped his excitement towards you, it is also emasculating him - you are showing him that he is not capable of taking care of you to the point that you have to pay for yourself.
  • If he is a handsome guy and he insist to go 50/50 - that's a glaring sign that you are probably date no #50 and other similarly desperate women have done the same in the past - your "kindness" is nothing new.
  • So you go 50/50, he feels a "connection" and seduce you to his bed? Yep, you aren't "the one". He has used that line on countless women and you are just another body to add to the count.
  • You will not lose him - you never had him in the first place.

​

5) "I am (insert self-depreciating talk here) and this is the only way for me to get a date/get him to like me"

  • I've observed a phenomenon whereby teenage girls who think they aren't 10/10 start giving away gifts, food and money unprompted to teenage boys in an effort to be liked and considered as a potential partner. And thus, going 50/50 on a date seems like natural transition to them.
  • This also leads to sex after the first or a few very low effort dates because the girl is desperate to be liked and to be chosen.
  • And here's the kicker - those same boys, who gets free stuff easily treat the teenage girls with less respect than girls who don't do that. Sure, they surround the pickme more frequently but behind her back, they talk about her like she worth less than dirt. She is the go to girl when they want easy sex, money and stuff - that's all she amounts to them.
  • So in this instance - going 50/50 not only doesn't protect her from being pressure into sex, but she is treated with less respect that girls who are in the same conventional attractive scale but don't do what her did.
  • So every time you found yourself thinking this way, ask yourself - "Don't I deserve happiness? Why should I give myself away to be taken advantage of by other people? Who are they? Why do they get to use and abuse me? What's so great about them that they get to be happy while making me miserable? Can't I be happy? I WANT TO BE HAPPY!"
  • If you can't yet stop those self-depreciating talk, at least force yourself to stubbornly wanting to be happy, and walk away from anyone and anything that try to take away that happiness from you.
  • The next step is to go do and ideal date that will make you happy ALONE. Dress fancy, get a fancy delivery, get some flowers, do all that fancy candlelight dinner or whatever you want - and do that as frequently as you can. At home of course because COVID - stay safe!
  • Don't think too much and just make it a routine - maybe reserve a special day every week to do that.
  • This is how you create a standard - eventually you will get to that standard where anything less than what you can do yourself is intolerable.
  • It is like when you get so used to high-quality salmon that you can't stomach a lower-grade salmon. You still eating it out of politeness, but deep down you know where your standard is.
  • You can't control how other people will treat you, but you can definitely control how to react to the instance where people don't treat you better than your minimum standard - aka block and delete, up and leave, bathroom and ghost.
  • Notice how any of this have nothing to do with your (insert self-depreciating talk) - because IT DOESN'T MATTER. If he asked you out, he better be treating you good, period.
  • No justification, none of that sizing you up and making it a transaction bullshit.
  • And if nobody want to ask you out? Then treat yourself so good that you don't need anybody to make you happy. That's how it should be - a partner is meant to make you happier than you already are, otherwise he isn't needed.

​

6) "I am lonely and just want company/sex"

  • Which one is harder - being harder on yourself for 6 months to a year, training yourself to fill up your time doing things and hobbies that benefit you while fighting that thought and feelings of loneliness or;
  • Go get that 50/50 date, eventually give in to his coercion for sex, get ghosted the morning after or get him as a partner and keep having to do all the damn things so that he will stay with you. While he continue to treat you like trash. For 5, 10, 20 years?
  • You will have to suffer either way - but which one is worth suffering for?
  • Yes, I admit that being alone is lonely at the beginning and sometimes, but if you are willing to suffer just for a year, you will eventually get used to this new lifestyle and found yourself getting busy with many many things that make you happy and content. Even lazing around doing nothing is beneficial for us women - we need frequent rests and stay away from any kind of stress and toxicity. You can't get that if you get saddled with a toxic manchild.
  • For those who think "well, he thinks he is using me but I am actually also using him for sex" - but at what cost? You are still vulnerable every time you are alone and naked in his room, you still got to worry about accidentally getting pregnant because some men think condom is the evilist evil to ever evil in the history of mankind, you still are at risk of being raped and killed because date is a common tactic for serial killers to lure his victims, you still have to spend money getting ready for the date, still forking out money for the "50/50", still at risk of catching feelings because women are emotionally intelligent but also more emotionally vulnerable in an intimate date setting, still have to look out for narcissist manipulations and well, pretty much think about all of the paranoid risks you have when going out with a stranger - and trust all of them. Because those paranoia are grounded in reality. You just never know who will be your nightmare.
  • We have to realize women will always have more to lose when we choose to go on a date. When going out on a date, men are afraid of getting duped by catfishers, while women are afraid of getting raped and killed.

​

TLDR;

  1. If a handsome guy asked you out on a date - chances are you are attractive to him regardless of what society says. If he is a HVM, he will want to impress you and going 50/50 not only will dampen his excitement, he will feel emasculated because you are signaling that he isn't enough.
  2. Yes, even if he looks like Henry Cavill or Jason Momoa secret lovechild - he is still a man. HVM handsome man will want to spoil you, LVM handsome man will want to take advantage of you.
  3. Even if you aren't conventionally attractive - going 50/50 won't get you the respect you deserve. You are at risk of being viewed as less than instead because your kindness, to men just signal that you are desperate for their attention and you know how men treat desperate pickmes.
  4. Start creating your own standard for an ideal date by going on that date ALONE routinely; creating a date standard will train you to not be able to tolerate anything less than what you are used to treat yourself to.
  5. Even if you go on dates simply for sex, we women still have to shoulder 100% of the risks. Remember, when going out on a date, men are afraid of getting duped by catfishers, while women are afraid of getting raped and killed. You never know just who will be your nightmare. It is really worth it?