*So it's been brought to my attention that some lurkers felt my experience with a guy I casually dated for all of a month, who broke in and stole heirlooms as well as my undergarments with two accomplices, must not have actually happened. My neighbours gave confirmation of them and assumed they were visiting at the time it happened. They literally left cigarette butts in the driveway so they saw people smoking and thought it was a visit.

Considering this was eight years ago (long before FDS was formed so implementing the handbook wasn't possible) and, while police do take fingerprints if there are any, it doesn't guarantee results or anything be done from it and they will tell you ahead of time that most BnEs don't get solved (something like maybe 8% get solved officially?). BnEs are not actually taken as seriously as people think; if DV and rape is dismissed ad nauseam, they definitely won't care about BnEs.

Lastly, because they seem to think a then 20yo couldn't be trusted with family heirlooms (they don't know anything about Jewish culture or how a bat mitzvah works), they just proved that they see young women and barely legals as incapable, so why would they prey on them and try to date them?*

Moving on...

The above is a perfect example of men gaslighting (or attempting to in this case) women into thinking their experiences either "never happened" or was feeding the "feminist propaganda machine".

There are countless women who've spoken worldwide, and not just on FDS, that will show receipts on men dismissing whole ass trauma and to "get over" something horrific, like getting sexually abused at 3yo.

Most often they will deem our real lived experiences, traumas and the shit that happens to us every day as lies or inflated, yet they will talk about trust issues if they got rejected in the tenth grade.

That woman you're interested in isn't "jaded", "over the hill" or "sneaky" because she's reserved and doesn't tell you every little secret about herself. It's because the risk of invalidation and furthering her very real trauma is at stake.