I've been lurking here for about three weeks now and have finally gotten the balls to post my story.

We have been married for 6 years as of yesterday. Up until the fall of last year, it had been a pretty uneventful, easy going, argument free marriage. I probably need to add that this is her second marriage...her first ended after her abusive husband cheated on her repeatedly after the birth of their child. So, I have a step daughter who I have been father to since she was 2 and we have a 5 year old son. My wife has always been insanely jealous of other women toward me and was always terrified that I would cheat on her for whatever reason.

Around August of last year she fell into a slump. She complained about my promotion taking me outta of the house more and our sex life suffered...it got routine, wash and repeat. It went from about twice a week to once a month. Stress from work caused me to pack on the pounds and for once she was finally getting a handle on her weight issues. Her downward spiral began around this time.

She complained about being depressed because she had no real friends since she quit roller derby, nor did she have any hobbies. I did the stupid thing and ramped up my time with her, I was going to be that missing friend. I pushed my friends to the side and felt guilty if I did something without her. I became the most pathetic husband love puppet to make her happy. It didn't work.

Meanwhile, she reconnected with some old friends, made some new ones, some of which are guys from her work who are married and she began spending her free time on facebook. She began going out with a group from her work mostly guys...she got more distant and her personality changed completely. She went from the loving good wife ( as much as a tattooed, rough and tumble redhead can do the good wife) to a whatever attitude toward everything, especially me. My first assumption is that she is cheating on me...I'm beta max, but I'm not a coward...so I ask. No she is not cheating on me, she would never do that, she is just trying to beat this depression. We kiss, make up, I vow to help her with the depression and hot sex follows.

Fast forward to January. We spend 7 days at disney world withe kids and she spends most of time on facebook and is angry toward me the whole time. For no good reason. A week after we get home she sits me down and proceeds to tell me that she is undeserving of a husband like me and if I wanted to end the marriage she would understand because even though she loves me, she is no longer attracted to me. She doesn't know why, but she is going crazy because all she gets to do is go to work and come home and be mom. She has lived in the same town her whole life and never had adventures, is resentful of me because I've lived in 5 states and have all these stories and friends and hobbies and she has none of that. So she is unhappy, and she knows I can't be happy with the way she has treated me. She needs some space.

I'm a tough guy. I hunt, I fish, I played football, I used to be a bouncer, I'm a trained combatant...I cried like an ugly baby. My world was ripped apart. How? Why? What? It's not me, it's her. Beta to the core, I pleaded and begged and reasoned. Nothing was going to turn her...she never shed a tear. Finally I push and she admits that I have smothered her, she fears for my health because I haven't gone for so much as a check up in years (I'm 38) and yes our sex life sucks, because it has gotten routine. Again I ask if there is anyone else, has she been cheating on me...again, no but she has had the opportunity and considered it, but idea of another man revolted her, because after all, she loves me. She just needs time and space.

Fine. I sleep on the couch for a few nights, I'm a total fucking wreck, I explain things to my boss (who went through a similar thing with his marriage ) because I'm tanking at work, he supports me. A great guy. I try and talk to her, but can't without tearing up, she is stoic to the core. Her frame is indestructible.

A couple weeks pass, she tell me I don't need to sleep on the couch, she doesn't need that much space. She suggests working on our friendship (yay I've been friend zoned by my wife!)and work on rebuilding from there. I joke that we should at least be friends with benefits. The woman who was so jealous of every other woman tells me that if I need sex, I'm free to find it elsewhere, she is okay with that right now. I'm flabbergasted. I respond with no, I cherish our marriage, I'm not going to be the one to cheat. She says she isn't either, she has a vibrator to keep her company. Awesome. Again I joke about being friends with benefits and she says she doesn't want to confuse me.

The next day I come home from work, shower head to the bedroom to change, she locks the door behind me and fucks my brains out. She says it didnt feel right afterwards. Next day...same thing. She is right, I'm confused.

The next week I join a gym. Since February I've lost 30 lbs and am below 170 ( still a little heavy for 5'7). I'm running, I've ran a 5k ...with her, which she became angry about, after she asked me to run with her...apparently I was infringing on her new hobby...it's was a nice argument in the hotel that resulted in more sex. My weeks in the gym are paying off, I'm more fit then I have been in years and I've reconnected with the guys and pretty much do what I want.

However, she is still in this holding pattern outside our marriage. She still encourages me to find sex elsewhere if I need it (my sex drive is through the roof from working out), because she has shut me down with a few hard "no"s. But either the same day or the next we end up fucking. We've had more sex since the marriage fractured then we did in the last year before. But it's up and down...one week it's bliss, the next she hates me again. I am confused. She claims to be trying...most days...maybe.

What does the Mrp think? Pull the pin, I'm ready for the frag.