Fast_Jimmy here, first time post. This is sort of an introductory post, but has a point. About mowing the lawn.

First, I found r/marriedredpill Thursday. Fucked the wife for the second time in twelve months Friday (on HER birthday, no less). Started lifting Saturday. And on third third day, I'm continuing to rise again. Been reading the sidebar, giving some heavy thought into what goals (TRUE goals, not just get more sex) I want to have in my MAP and reading comments.

As background, I am a career Beta. I read the description and it sounded like reading a biography. Always played by the rules, got pissed when people didn't obey my unspoken social contracts, 25 year old virgin, the whole nine yards. Then I was introduced into the Seduction community via Neil's The Game and suddenly developed confidence, alpha behaviors and constant self improvement. Two years later, I found and married my wife. Feeling content, I applied all my alpha mindset (or so I thought) into my work and then raising our children, moving up the corporate ladder and taking a lot of pride in my two kids.

Except my marriage fell back into my uber-beta bullshit, with my wife dictating orders and scolding me exactly how she talks to our four year old. It took us going into a home buying process where the wife was in danger of collapsing our finances with outrageous expectations and unrealistic timeframes.

Anyway, I'm just now starting to work on my shit (and seeing encouraging, if baby step, improvement already). So if you see, call me out without hesitation or mercy. I need it.

But here's my point - even in the first three days, my beta mind is bending itself backwards trying to make bargains, trying to justify back pedaling now that the wife has just started to not talk to me like a toddler. Which is bullshit.

And then I started mowing the lawn. And started thinking - why am I doing this? Am I mowing this to keep my wife from nagging at me? Am I doing it to avoid passive aggressive looks from the neighbors?

Or am I doing it to take pride in how my house looks? Am I doing it FOR ME? Today, I took extra care to edge the road, trim the bushes, even pushing through when it started raining. Because being sloppy bothered me now. Having shit be just adequate wasn't my goal anymore.

So I pose the question - who are you mowing the lawn for? If the answer is anything other than you, you need to figure out the reason why before you keep walking in circles thinking you are being productive.