Why Are Men So Angry?

ed_sparrow · 2012-07-30T00:56:28+00:00

First, I saw this was by Hymowitz and set my expectations very low. To my immense surprise, she surpassed them by actually criticising women's behaviour. Bravo, Kay. Maybe there's hope for you yet.

Of course, she swings wide on a number of points. For one, she sees no contradiction in both describing women's behaviour as being unequal and exploitative, but also describing men's reactions to the behaviour as "immaturity, as my own book seems to suggest ... [or] just good, old-fashioned misogyny".

Additionally, she underplays the issue as simply being a matter of men's frustrating with unequal financial burdens or behavioural expectations. There's an element on that, no doubt, but it's also worth pointing out that our current generation of young men had greater exposure to the family court system growing up than their fathers or grandfathers would have. My parents are divorced, a lot of my friends' parents are divorced, and many of us saw, first hand, the way the system would favour our mothers.

This last element is important, because it further emphasises the risk-benefit deficit of the current dating environment. Not only do a great many women hold backwards, entitled attitudes to men and dating, but should men clear that hurdle and get married, they risk losing everything if their wife gets bored with them. Admittedly, this is probably not in the forefront of an early-twenty-something man's mind when dating, but I don't think the significance of this can be completely ignored either.

villevn · 2012-07-30T01:48:16+00:00

Hmm, let's see. Living my youth in a culture which implied my gender was bad and abusive by default, which then led to me being submissive and having problems of self-esteem and depression. Going through loads of other bullshit ideologies like buddhism and yoga in order to find some fleeting happiness. Of course, these ideologies only emphasised "soft" feminine values such as constant "love" and hypersensitivity to friggin' everything, basically just trying to make me more like those oh-so-saintly women. Finally at 27, got rid of those, found the red pill...and realised how much crap and blatant gender shaming I'd just swallowed during my adolescent life >:o Goddamnit, if that doesn't make you angry, I don't know what does...

FrenchFuck · 2012-07-30T00:56:02+00:00

I have to really give the author a ton of credit. It is incredibly rare for a person to respond to criticism of their book by actually changing their position. She went from a bigot to basically an MRA advocate when she was confronted with evidence. This really shows a lot of character.

rztzz · 2012-07-30T04:32:14+00:00

I have to admit that I have grown to resent many women's gold-digging nature. I understand it is sometimes built into female biology. It was difficult to hear my sisters talking about "maybe it's a good idea to put ourselves in a life situation where we can meet rich men and not middle class men". It's just hard when your own sisters are wishing for an entitled life. True to statistics, my 24 y/o girlfriend makes 48k while I make 40k. Not a huge gap but at our salary levels the extra 8k is huge.

However she will happily, happily accept any offer I have to pay for things. I probably pay for a good 55% of our shared bills and stuff. She does contribute, almost equally, but it's not equal even though she makes 15% more. It's really annoying how if the genders were reversed, and I was making more money, she probably would expect me to pick up even more bills. I think about it and I resent it, I wish I didn't resent it. The problem is that I don't know of a girl who would act differently, and I'm not convinced of the MGTOW movement yet.

sskmpd · 2012-07-30T07:52:32+00:00

Here's an idea for the author. Maybe men are angry because women demand raw unfeathered market economy on the dating scene, and except men to adopt the mantra that if they (men) fail then it is their own fault. But in all other fields female failure is explained as discrimination. It is never the woman's fault.

Ted8367 · 2012-07-30T03:44:54+00:00

[Her new book argues] "that the new stage I call pre-adulthood—the twenties and early thirties—was not bringing out the best in single young men"

She invents a "new stage" of life (for men) and calls it pre-adulthood. Presumably she felt that Shakespeare's seven stages no longer sufficed: infancy, childhood, the lover, the soldier, the justice, old age, and senile decay. I'd place her "pre-adulthood" somewhere in Shakespeare's "lover" stage. See the picture on the cover of her book to see where she thinks it fits in.

Why did she feel the need to invent "pre-adulthood"? In my opinion, because the "lover" isn't turning out as expected. Why not? Feminism supplies the answer - as it should, we've spent enough money on feminist academic research - it's all the fault of the men! They need to grow up and man up and etc etc etc etc.

The utility of this answer has become evident even to Hymowitz. Now she dimly recognizes that something beyond her understanding is wrong. Maybe she will move towards the truth, but personally I don't hold out much hope for that.

Chuckeedee · 2012-07-30T03:18:02+00:00

So, is this what Susan Faludi famously called the backlash? Is it immaturity, as my own book seems to suggest? Is it the Internet as an escape valve for decades of pent-up rebellion against political correctness? Or, is it just good, old-fashioned misogyny?

Speaking for myself, none of the above. My own disgust is based in affirmative action tilting the playing-field in favor of women at the expense of men... except that instead of "tilting" the field, the situation has come to a point where workplaces, particular government, are often selecting women to the exclusion of men.

...Never before in history have men been matched up with women who are so much their equal—socially, professionally, and sexually. By the time they reach their twenties, they have years of experience with women as equal competitors—in school, on soccer fields, and even in bed...

True equality doesn't come into it. It's a deliberate program of bias, beginning with "nurturing" and "facilitative" education programs that deliberately disadvantage boys' proclivity to competition. And this program of bias continues on into adulthood in affirmative action programs where in any situation of "ambiguity" in the workplace, in the implicit pursuit of quotas and equal outcome (as opposed to equal opportunity), first preference is always given to the woman. I don't think people realize how pernicious these effects are, even where quota-setting has officially been banned. HR departments know what is "expected" of them. It's this farce of women's entitlement masquerading as "equality" that is most repugnant above all else.

And women still expect men to pick up the tab? No wonder men are getting angry.

el_chief · 2012-07-30T07:51:24+00:00

Is this a new Feminist tactic? Pretending to be reasonable and sensible? I'm confused...

Maschalismos · 2012-07-30T10:54:53+00:00

Because of female deception at every turn. These days the trick to getting rich isn't working hard, but avoiding getting snookered into the many female perpetrated money scams. Also feminists. Always cooking up new ways to scam money from men.

I don't get angry about it. I wise up and scam them before they can scam me.

celibacy4life · 2012-07-30T16:31:51+00:00

I don't think it's anger so much as being practical in this case. It's such a fucking hassle, that I'd rather sit out. The detriments outweigh the benefits. I like that this is becoming normal, that men are rejecting the rules of courtship. I hope to see more "Where have all the good men gone?" articles in the future. It's going to force a change when 80% of the female population has to compete for 5% of the male population.

PierceHarlan · 2012-07-30T17:19:21+00:00

Gee, just what we need. Another features writer who reduces young men to caricature so she can sell a book.

StrongMRA · 2012-07-30T05:13:22+00:00

I don't know, maybe because we're being sent to jail en masse based on false accusations. Has that idea ever crossed your mind?

typhonblue · 2012-07-30T01:59:12+00:00

[permanently deleted]

2012-07-30T03:21:57+00:00

Why are men so angry ?

The answer: alot of us are sick and tired of being made into play things and used as objects rather then people to stroke a lonely ego that things may or may not advance within a relationship. Women judge men based on looks and money rather then anything else.

ENTP · 2012-07-30T15:21:05+00:00

Interesting to me how sole responsibility for all these problems rests on men. A biased, misandristic, and horrible article.

stestephe · 2012-07-30T12:02:45+00:00

These highly paid pop culture writers avoid the central issue. -- What is to become of the child I will conceive? -- Will I protect my child? Will I delight in the life of my child? Will I teach my child?

The death and state-enforced (violent) removal and abuse (indoctrination, deliberate dumbing down ("whole language"), forced drugging, warehousing in dysfunctional child warehouses ("schools") etc.) of children is the deep issue. Now we are seeing "progressives," soul-dead "experts" and parasite professors call for "post-birth abortion." Brave New World. Take your pill. Go back to your TV now.

Doogie-Howser · 2012-07-30T04:08:14+00:00

I don't know why, but after reading this, I came to some weird belief that after the sexual revolution and being abused by men for so long, women in turn abused men and we took it as our due, I guess we felt we deserved it. After all we did to women during the past generations. But after generation and generation of "woman power" and the sexual revolution, "equality" and letting women have "justice" became almost like slavery. We in turn let ourselves become slaves. We felt so guilty by hurting women that we let the rules get so slack in equality, we were so scared of the way things could go back to (women being raped in mass orgies, witch-hunts etc) that we let ourselves get stepped on. The rules simply stood right over us because we didn't want to seem misogynists during the woman power age of the 60's and so forth.

I'm sorry, I have no facts to prove myself. I'm just stating an opinion. I know that I can be wrong. Just stating how I feel.

Title	Why Are Men So Angry?
Author	thetrollking
Upvotes	63
Comments	77
Date	July 30, 2012 12:36 AM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/xd6em/why_are_men_so_angry/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/why-are-men-so-angry.1016900 https://theredarchive.com/post/1016900

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