The narrative behind Are We Dating The Same Guy from men in PPD is totally inaccurate

HazyMemory7 · 2023-03-17T02:37:23+00:00

For anyone that wants an objective insight into the group, see this thread from a woman not too long who was a moderator in the groups. Here are some of her comments:

The groups may have been started to identify the dangerous group, but in the last 6 months they become 90% superficial.

.

I stopped moderating for a few reasons including: it's monotonous work vetting the membership requests, the admins and some of the moderators were quite toxic, and the potential legal risks of being involved.

When I asked her "I have stated that the rule pertaining to "put all the details in the comments section, not the post" is intended to circumvent the fact that these groups violate fb's ToS. Much less likely to get penalized for some bad comments than negative content within the actual post. Am I wrong?":

You are completely correct.

I've seen some users on ppd and reddit in general talk about being slandered, or people they know being slandered and pursuing legal action. The group will not remove posts even in instances of slander, getting a lawyer involved is the only recourse.

The concept of the groups may be tame, and there's some moderation going on like you mentioned, sure, but there's a reason the rules are explicitly written to circumvent facebook ToS by posting everything in comments and not posts, and any space where you can make affirmative claims about someone that may harm their reputation without being given an opportunity to defend themselves is inherently problematic. The creator of these groups also takes donations, so she is profiting off of the growth of these groups. Apparently it's expensive to run a free facebook group?

I think these groups are reflective of a larger trend over the past ~5-8 years where women want to circumvent the concept of innocent until proven guilty and portray all men as violent people, sexual abusers, pricks ect... this is how you get the Johnny Depp situation and how you get Gilette making a commercial painting all men as sexual abusers.

If it's something serious like SA or domestic abuse go to your family and take legal action. Your defense of these groups is so a bunch of women can vent that a guy ghosted them? Do you have an idea how flaky and disrespectful of people's time women are these days?

Mobrowncheeks · 2023-03-17T04:04:00+00:00

I first heard about these groups a year ago. My friend who was in one let me browse it .

This is a non point. Being posted is the issue, not if the guy actually did something or not
Obviously this rule will change from city to city. But they definitely are attacking men unchecked in that group on the one I was watching
Doesn’t matter if positively is being spread, the fact that any information about him as he is being posted to a billboard for a group to critique without his consent is gross.
1. See 1 and 3
I don’t see what’s supposed to be miss understood about this
Women well definitely post men that they haven’t yet met, met once, or just got introduced to in these groups. This isn’t true.
This is a rule that changes group to group
Imagine saying there is no gossiping when the entire platform that is being used to do this is based on gossip . It’s a he said she said about a man who’s been posted up on a bulletin board to be commented on .

All this information doesn’t actually change anything about what men think of these groups, they are cringe at best and off putting, gross, and dangerous at worst. I wouldn’t date a woman who would post me in one regardless of her feedback

Acrobatic_Computer · 2023-03-17T13:12:39+00:00

Y'know, I find it interesting how much these groups are defended, when asking for a paternity test generally isn't.

These groups are unreliable whereas paternity tests are reliable.
Both could be taken as a lack of trust in one's partner
Paternity testing early is massively legally important and has fundamental implications for one's life, whereas getting two timed definitely sucks, but not nearly at the same level.
These groups are relatively public, paternity testing is private
Paternity testing is ultimately between child and supposed father, not between the partners directly, while these groups are directly about, and involved using the image of, these guys.

Remote-Ad-5105 · 2023-03-17T02:47:27+00:00

Why are you defending it? What’s your body count and full name? Share it with us so we can know you’re not a hypocrite. Put a picture of your face on there too.

Treacle-Flimsy · 2023-03-17T07:50:48+00:00

So you would be fine with a group that was actively doxxing women, sharing their private info to what to put pressure while dating, etc, just because they say good things about good women and most women had zero feedback?

Like lol, who are you trying to convince here?

TempoIndigo · 2023-03-17T17:29:50+00:00

Nope, you can literally make a troll account and start slandering people. I will never trust strangers on the internet 100% even if you provide proof

These communities devolve to false accusations, people getting mad at their exes and lying and misandrists going around making up fake stories. I’ve seen this hundreds of times with women, men, PvP, everything

The fact you take internet pixels as fact and think your unsecured community is actually ironclad means you are highly susceptible to bullshit online

PonderingPeaches · 2023-03-17T04:24:18+00:00

The way I see it.. you can’t stop people from posting you. So.. don’t do anything anyone would say anything bad about 🤷🏻‍♀️

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costwy55 · 2023-03-20T15:14:03+00:00

Interesting how so many comments were like "he didn't put in the effort, not worth dating". Like that just means he wasn't that into that girl, nothing more than that lol. These groups are toxic.

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Individual-Clue9738 · 2023-05-23T21:06:09+00:00

If anyone feels like comments about them are false. You CAN file and hold women liable. It might take a few years for the courts to play out. But I have had a coworker who filed a complaint against 2 women. Not only do the women have to apologize. The women have to pay over $1m in damages. Money, they do not have.

Title	The narrative behind Are We Dating The Same Guy from men in PPD is totally inaccurate
Author	StarTrippinn
Upvotes	9
Comments	103
Date	March 17, 2023 1:49 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/11tdnrj/the_narrative_behind_are_we_dating_the_same_guy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/the-narrative-behind-are-we-dating-the-same-guy.1180564 https://theredarchive.com/post/1180564

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