Is making me shake my head! I’m laughing a bit as I write this and somewhat rather surprised at the same time. I’m on a dating app and I literally just got deleted mid conversation by the guy (unmatched) because I said I don’t believe in sex until commitment.

Context: He asked about past relationships and dating experiences and I told him a dealbreaker for me would be anxious guys who don’t take initiative. Just can’t be actually bothered with them and he asked me to explain. I used an example of someone I went on a single date with who wanted to check on the parking duration of his car and he got anxious, I mean the heart rate was high in his Apple Watch because he got scared there might be a ticket. Then he asked me to explain further and I mentioned this date was so paranoid/fearful he would not consider a committed relationship with a person, calling each other in an official way boyfriend and girlfriend, unless they’ve been ‘seeing each other’ for at least six months and have been sleeping together.

I was like ‘nope I’m not doing that because commitment matters to me’, seriously these attachment-scared people.

Now/Last Night: So I told this and the guy was like what??? How would you know if you’re sexually compatible? I reply: Well if you are deciding to be a person’s girlfriend/boyfriend, surely you’re attracted to them? Physically? You want to be intimate? Him: Yes but how can you be sure? I reply: You’ve at least kissed/hugged this person, surely you’d want to be able to share intimacy.

Then suddenly the conversation is gone. Deleted from my matches.

Look I’m not that bothered though it’s honestly surprising in a funny way that it was the reason? What’s happening to people nowadays and the dating scene. It’s like..you’re a pariah for wanting commitment and a proper way to approach a relationship that is emotionally responsible. My two best friends have their partners and had sex before commitment and sometimes they do tell me to ‘be open to it’ (not in a forceful way) but the idea is just so wrong to me. I don’t know what does everyone think?

Anyone been in this position?