Advances from unattractive men

One-Introduction-566 · 2024-02-26T00:13:02+00:00

I think it’s normal, men who are seeking a partner or whatever, will try to approach and they know rejection is part of the process. I guess why not shoot higher, maybe once in a while you’ll get a yes, worst case you get a no. I’d just decline politely and move on. I’m sure it’s already tough for some men to make a move so I wouldn’t try to make them feel bad even if you feel you are above their league or something.

Wife_and_Mama · 2024-02-26T00:21:01+00:00

I would wager that the more successful and attractive men aren't necessarily less confident, but more secure. They don't have to come on so strong and are likely better able to read subtle cues of interest from women. They also might be unavailable. As for turning them down, "no, thank you" is a perfectly acceptable response.

Jenneapolis · 2024-02-26T00:08:43+00:00

I feel like some men are just overwhelmed by the desire to talk to you, they don’t even care if they get rejected. It’s like they aren’t even thinking that far in advance, and I always presume this is just how they move through life with many women, so don’t take it personally.

I will never forget when I was 21 and I just moved to my city, I was exploring the neighborhood taking a walk around a beautiful city lake in the middle of the day, minding my own business wearing just normal clothes, jeans and a t shirt. All of the sudden I get a tap on the shoulder. This man who was probably 50 and a below average looking guy, dressed sloppy, had a middle age man belly and was sweaty approached me and was totally out of breath. He immediately apologized for being out of breath and said he was in that state because he had started walking faster in order to catch up with me. Then he made some comment about how he had been watching my ass from behind for some time.

There is no way this guy actually thought he had a shot with me and there could be no misunderstanding that I was interested, I didn’t even see him because he was behind me and I didn’t even know he existed. This was a guy overwhelmed by his hormones and acted on an impulse, that’s all, it was nothing deeper than that.

ClassicalElegance-31 · 2024-02-26T00:15:58+00:00

This is easier to explain than you think. Everyone loves nice things. Everyone. If you’re in the “nice” category, everyone wants you, even trashy men. They have the audacity because they are trashy, and figure you’ll probably reject them anyway butty what if, if they do that with every girl they find super attractive one of them will end up saying yes right ? Just ignore them.

CountTheBees · 2024-02-25T23:29:50+00:00

Men work their way down. They start with the hottest girl (that they think they can get), ask her out, get rejected, then the next hottest girl, ask her out, get rejected, repeat, until they don't get rejected anymore.

Some men never work up the courage to ask anyone out. Some men give up after 3 rejections and some have hundreds and are still going. Some men rely on their charm and wit rather than looks, or hope to impress you over the course of a longer conversation which might never happen. Confidence varies from man to man and isn't tied to what they look like or how smart they are. Additionally... In general, the more confident a man is, the less he likes you. He could just not care whether you say yes or no.

Just recently I sat on the train next to a man that bragged about being able to hit people without remorse and having drugs. Perhaps he hoped I was a drug addict or that I liked violence. Or perhaps he had had good luck with that approach in the past. He didn't ask me anything concrete so I didn't even have to reject him. I did have to ignore a question he asked about where I lived. I answered that I would take a cab. It wasn't what he asked but there was no way I was telling him even the suburb I lived in.

Definitely just be gracious and don't say yes to anything. Wait for them to ask something concrete. If they don't, you can just wait till the conversation ends. If they do, apologise and say you're not interested with a smile. Be gracious but firm.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2024-02-26T15:43:03+00:00

First, don't be insulted if you think a guy is "beneath you." Those of us with confidence tend to shoot our shot.

Second, some guys have "outcome independence" - I wrote a piece on it on the men's forum in which I talked about "Level 99 DGAF." The plain truth for most men is that most women are going to think they are "below average" - Hypergamy is a cruel mistress.

Men have to learn to roll with it, though. Think of it this way: both men and women go into a casino with $1000, but the women have 5 x $200 chips and the men have 1000 x $1 chips. The result is, men play faster and looser. If he risks $50 and loses, so what? He's still got $950, but she can only lose 1 or 2 chips before things get dicey.

Men also vary. For example, I am a natural extrovert - pretty much every woman who lingers withing 5-10 feet of me gets a "Hey there, sweetheart" or smth, whether they are 18 or 80. Sometimes that's me "opening" her and sometimes that's me being nice to a middle-aged or elderly lady. The fact is, however, is that most men are terrified of approaching women. And the guys who do it comfortably and confidently have almost always been rejected a lot, often times brutally. Approaching women is skills-based, so you have to DO it. I tell guys that after 25 aproaches they aren't going to be afraid any more, after 50 it's no longer going to matter how hot she is, and after 75 or 100, you're going to start thinking, "What is the most effed up thing I can say and still pull?"

As for how to handle it, start with a simple "No thank you." If you have a boyfriend you can put that in there, also. If the guy persists (women are sometimes open to being persuaded, although that's more a thing for Rom-Coms), repeat, firmly, "Hey, I said no" and add whatever flowery language you need to. After that, you can unleash the hounds on him.

countrylemon · 2024-02-25T23:47:03+00:00

machismo will always exist, blind confidence doesn’t require anything to back it up, men being men.

Minimum_Candy99 · 2024-02-26T04:30:57+00:00

Some men also think that if you smile at them or are generally polite that you're flirting with them. It's not necessarily a bad thing. I've used it a lot to influence "pretty privilege" so in a sense it's a way of getting what you want even from those men who are not in your league.

IndividualistAW · 2024-03-15T13:29:36+00:00

You’ve got a bit of a “how dare they” tone. Just be nice and tell them no without conveying that kind of attitude.

TheBunk_TB · 2024-02-26T12:57:04+00:00

Be thankful or at least graceful

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xx_AphroditeDove_xx · 2024-02-26T01:48:31+00:00

I think attractive men just don't have to try hard. If you are a HVM women will easily fall into your lap. Regular men have to try a little harder.

I'll say one thing, when I looksmaxxed I ended up receiving less attention from unattractive/LVM so being hit on less. However, the quality of men was MUCH higher.

Some men will always have the audacity and be delusional. I have seen fat, broke, scruffy looking men with no degree and zero prospects think they deserve a beautiful woman. So I am not saying to feel bad when what you perceive to be LV males hit on you because some genuinely lack self awareness.

There are studies that show that men tend to overestimate their attractiveness and women tend to underestimate or be more realistic. I tend to find this to be true in my observations of life.

AutoModerator · 2024-02-25T22:54:15+00:00

Title: Advances from unattractive men

Author Global_Moose_1991

Full text: I’d like to begin by saying that I have a good understanding of where I stand in terms of my own attractiveness, intelligence and social stature. My previous dating experience has also been with men in the same league. However I do come across men every now and then who wouldn’t be considered attractive, intelligent or masculine by any measure, yet they seem to have the confidence to approach me and ask me out.

I want to know this sub’s view on how you handle such situations and I’d also like to understand how some men have the confidence to approach women out of their league.

^{This is the original text of the post and this is an automated service}

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

LisaAuChocolat · 2024-02-25T23:17:47+00:00

i doubt you are out of their league. you re probably overvaluing yourself. if you werent youd have a family and ring on your finger by now, real talk. other women your age have it, just sayin

MadMax777g · 2024-02-26T12:52:31+00:00

Always be closing just like in sales

Salt_Radish_63 · 2024-02-26T01:01:33+00:00

👎🏻

WitchedPixels · 2024-02-26T08:00:33+00:00

It's a mistake for men to always go for the hottest girl, those women are often times the most ugly on the inside where it really matters. That's a lesson that many guys learn the hard way. Some never learn at all.

Title	Advances from unattractive men
Author	Global_Moose_1991
Upvotes	1
Comments	36
Date	February 25, 2024 10:54 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/1b01nxq/advances_from_unattractive_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/advances-from-unattractive-men.1246443 https://theredarchive.com/post/1246443

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