TLDR: My husband used to be the dominant one in the relationship, I dumbly encouraged him to quit his career, now everything's ruined and I'm also pregnant. I need serious help.

I seriously need help. Believe it or not, when I met my husband, he was at a top institution set up for a top career. We were both in college, and before that, in 2012, I had even read those traditional femininity books, and taken a class for 200 USD from a website called The Feminine Woman. I was dead serious about being the feminine one in the relationship way before I even met him a few years later.

So fast forward, we're together six years at this point, I start an online business that takes off. He's miserable and inconsolable about his career. I make a crucial mistake that I thought I was better than. I knew I chose well, I knew I was with someone who was masculine, independent, so I thought we could handle it. I told him why not quit your career that you hate, and live on my business while you pursue your own online business (he had a few business ideas).

Two years later is now, my business is ok, his is unsuccessful, and our dynamic is completely different. Before he would take me out to dinner, and now he apparently can't count cash (at the restaurant he said literally, 'You'll have to do this next time because I can't' WHICH AS YOU GUYS KNOW "I CAN'T" IS SUPPOSED TO BE MY LINE ACCORDING TO LAURA DOYLE). Anyway, he has me make all the phone calls for bills etc because 'Im better at it,' (he actually doesn't have a phone because he 'doesn't need one since I have one'), he asks me for advice on every thing he does.

I don't want to be manipulative and try to change how I behave if it's not from my heart, so I struggle with that. I also struggle with being too honest actually. But honesty hasn't worked. I talked with him today (which we all knoowwwww doesn't work) and he asked me, since I'm so unhappy that he isn't stepping up, to tell him what to do.

It was interesting, he told me that since I'm the most unhappy, I have the most control. He said that if I complain, I get to decide what we do, and if I don't complain, then we can just continue as we're doing (with me making all the decisions and making all the money).

After today's conversation I realized I needed help. I feel like even though I tried to be as caring as possible, I just beat him down even more and he's even less likely to step up now than before. I just felt awful. Also, saving the best for last, I'm also pregnant (he insisted that either we have children now or don't have any at all since I'm turning 30 this year, so with those two options, I chose to have children because I don't want to be childless).

Where do I even begin? I need baby steps. Thank you for reading.