To become a man, a boy must cleave the bond from his first love, his mother. This requires agency. To become a woman, a girl must have her bond to her first love, her father, cleaved- by a man with agency.

The original relationship a boy has with his mother is very similar to the relationship a cuck has with his wife. The boy follows the leadership of the mom, cries to her his problems, and showers her with affection simply for virtue of being his mother. He is wild, impulsive and needs her discipline. This is natural as the boy develops and needs nurturing, but it can become insidious if the boy never cleaves the bond using his mind- by making the decision to conquer the material world (starting with himself and his impulses). By making the decision to be a man. A boy without guidance into manhood will seek out the same impotent, emotional-support based relationship he had with his mother and then criticize women for not being into him for more than what he can provide. It is the strong father who teaches him to be his own rock and take agency, to control his dick and penetrate the world. To not rely on his mother for his perseverance, and subsequently not rely on his partner. He must face the world alone.

The original relationship a girl has with her father is very similar to the relationship a wife has with her cuck. The father protects her and cares for her in exchange for nothing but her existence. He praises her and supports her regardless of her poor behaviour, because he is her father and that's his duty. This is natural as the girl is developing and needs nurturing, but it can become insidious if she is never taught humility by a principled mother. She will become spoiled and gluttonous, expecting men to cater to her. She will be unable to attain a man of value due to her behaviour, only able to attract cucks that she will resent. It is the humble mother who teaches the daughter to give up her agency to a superior man.

This dynamic is why you always saw mothers who spoil their sons but are mean to their daughters, while the men were mean to their sons and sweet to their daughters. Because the man's job to his son is to make him hard, make him a man. So he must be mean. The son needs to reject the oedipal, subservient relationship to his mother and take a woman.

A mother on the other hand must teach her daughter the power of her submission, of her femininity. She must humble her daughter from worshipping herself as a false god. If she doesnt teach her humility, then she will be too stubborn to have her oedipal relationship cleaved for her, and will grow up resentful at men for not claiming her.

It all starts with the man with agency. The mother will not be humbled and thus pass that to her daughter unless she is looking at a superior being. Men have the genetic and hormonal potential to do things women can only dream of. But it starts with choosing to be that man.

tldr: Being a man starts when you take agency.