It's been a while since I've been on a date. To put it short I've been in Monk Mode. It's been going well so far. Working on new skills and taking major actions that will help me improve the quality of life.
I went out with a girl that I've been talking to for few weeks. We never met in person. A mutual friend brought us together.
We meet up and things were going great. I've been out of practice so my comebacks and communication skills were rusty.
We go see a movie. Throughout the whole time I kinoing and it felt to a point where I knew I could kiss her anytime as she was giving me that look.
After the movie we go to a random bar and just chat. More touching and then we talk close to each other. I can see it in her eyes that she's into it. However as I go for the kiss she rejects it but comes closer to me. I put my arm around her and she's fine about it.
At that point I thought she just wasn't ready or something or hates PDA. We talk some more and then she drops this on me.
She tells me that she's going to be honest with me and that she's not attracted to me at all.
I was taken aback to what she just said. It took me a moment for what she said to sink in. She then to proceed to tell me that she wants to be attracted to me but she just couldn't.
She killed the vibe. I excused myself to the bathroom. There, I felt really disappointed and my mood went down. I honestly didn't know what to do.
I went back and we talked about it. I said I was fine but my body language and mannerism said otherwise.
At this point she saying how she's sorry and that she's the type to be honest. I was emotional. Simple as that. I let my emotions dictate my actions.
I asked her why and everything but she says she doesn't know either and that she just feels it.
I laughed when she said that and told her that the guy had to be hot and muscular. She defended herself saying that the person doesn't have to be hot and that she was attracted to uglier people(Yeah, okay.)
She tried to cheer me up by saying that I'm attractive and that I'm good looking, blah blah blah the lies and fluff. At this point any normal person would leave but I kept talking about it. I wanted to guilt trip her for some reason for killing the vibe.
We left the bar and headed on out our separate ways. I felt angry throughout the ride home.
I know that all women won't find you attractive but she gave the impression that she was. It felt as if you're a kid and your parents tell you that they are going to buy you that toy on Saturday. Throughout the whole week they seem excited to get you that toy but when Saturday comes they say no and that they are busy.
Now that I'm writing it down and evaluating the situation I can see that it went wrong since the start of the date.
I gave her too much attention and not enough teasing. I was being super needy and didn't hold frame at all. I gave her the power without realizing it. I was so focused on getting her I didn't realize it wasn't working.
After she had told me that she wasn't attracted to me. I should have thought logically instead of emotionally. Pay the tab, smile, say goodbye and going my own way and be silent about it, don't be fazed, not rebutting her rejection and SUFFER IN SILENCE. That is what I should have done to save face and show her that she means nothing to me.
But, I didn't do that. Instead I showed her that I was needy and weak. To the people reading this, learn from my mistake and be the bigger person.
If a woman rejects you throughout the date or says she just wants to be friends etc. Leave. Don't think you can convince her or change her mind. It may be a shit test but who cares. There are a lot of women out there. Abundance, the one thing that I forgot to remind myself of. Don't make the same mistake as me.
[–]SnowMonkeyCracker 1 points1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]amekooky9 points10 points11 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]boscoist2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]general-heartless1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]BobbyPeru35 points36 points37 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]general-heartless0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Gutrek110 points111 points112 points (10 children) | Copy Link
[–]timmytimmyburner27 points28 points29 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]jonib0ni55 points56 points57 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]HS-Thompson29 points30 points31 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]akatsukirp24 points25 points26 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]askmrcia8 points9 points10 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]akatsukirp5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]draskenmarr 9 points10 points11 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]gELSK6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]thedruginfoguy -5 points-4 points-3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Alpha_Jedi11 points12 points13 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]crush_snort_red_pill 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]eatinrice10 points11 points12 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]ItsYough12310 points11 points12 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]WestyWorld18 points19 points20 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]machialon-3 points-2 points-1 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]WestyWorld4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]gELSK0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]machialon4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]thedruginfoguy 27 points28 points29 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]ItsYough12316 points17 points18 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]thedruginfoguy 8 points9 points10 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]gELSK4 points5 points6 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]thedruginfoguy 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]antariusz9 points10 points11 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]RPBulletDodger14 points15 points16 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]akatsukirp5 points6 points7 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]AP330000 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]grandmazboy5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]gELSK6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]CodenameLEE3 points4 points5 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]askmrcia1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]sleepyweaselisawake5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]OSaraiva2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]september_cutter2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]theycallmeiago9 points10 points11 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]CodenameLEE7 points8 points9 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]CodenameLEE7 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]nickm2050 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]grandmazboy3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]GunnarX1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Mr_Get_Right0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Scriptopeia0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]general-heartless0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Caspero4441 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Andrew543210 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]noct3rn4l0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]BlastCorporation0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Caspero4441 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]barb9212-1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]tsingi 1 points1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]BlastCorporation1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]HopefulEunuch -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Trpogre-1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link