originally posted on the misc: http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?p=1350092581#post1350092581

Every time you cold approach a woman, you meet one of two women:

The woman who isn't interested in you, and who is inconvenienced by your approach, and

The woman who is interested in you, and who is excited by your approach

When I was younger, I lived my life in respect of the first category of women, and in disrespect of the second category of women. I did not approach women, because I did not want to inconvenience any of them under any circumstances. I felt shame and embarrassment at the idea of ANYONE thinking poorly of me. In so doing, I pushed aside the women who actually liked me and did not get together with them in order to not inconvenience the women who did NOT like me.

Think about that for a second, because if you don't cold approach, you're doing the same thing.

It's like saying there are 100 people in the room, and two of them will happily invest $1 million in your crazy business idea that will change the world for the better if you ask, but 98 of them are going to be bothered that you asked them to invest in your crazy business idea because WHY would they want to invest in your crazy business idea, you loon? And because you've never asked for investments before, you have zero instincts whatsoever about which of those people is which.

The guys who don't cold approach are the ones who look at that room full of people and say, \"Well, it's better if I just don't ask anyone... I don't want to be a nuisance.\"

Here's what happens when you don't cold approach:

The 93% of women (or whatever it is; the numbers change as your fundamentals get tighter and you become more attractive) who aren't interested in you save a few minutes because they don't have to politely tell you \"sorry, I'm not interested\"

The 7% of women who think you're clever and amazing and attractive never meet you and lead lives that are the worse for it

YOU don't get laid or get a girlfriend at ALL, or are forced to settle for the scraps you're able to get a few times a year at best from social circle, which you also won't be any good at if you don't cold approach, usually In this case, ONE (1) group of people benefits: the women who don't care about you.

And two (2) groups are inconvenienced: women who care about you, and you.

Is this not INSANE?! You're putting the saving of a minute or two each of the time of those in the group of women who don't care for you at all above the happiness of yourself and women who find you attractive! I did it for a long time, and if there's anything I regret, it's that I did this. I was a lunatic. What kind of a self-defeating moron ignores the women who like him in order to benefit the women who don't?!

Now, here's what happens when you DO cold approach:

The 93% of women (or whatever it is) who aren't interested in you lose a minute or two politely turning you down, and get both a bit of annoyance (\"Do I REALLY have to tell this guy I'm not interested?\") and a bit of a self-esteem boost (\"I am SO in demand\")

The 7% of women who think you're clever and amazing and attractive are THRILLED because they've met you and they like you and it's wonderful

YOU get great interactions with women, get dates, get laid, get girlfriends, hone your social skills, develop a social intuition that makes you better able to avoid the women who aren't interested and home in on the women who are, and turn yourself into the kind of really attractive man that most women only rarely get to meet and interact with

That's pretty cool, if you ask me.