Overcoming depression

RedSunBlue · 2014-02-05T08:27:57+00:00

Clean your room.

Shave and shower every morning.

Wear clean and ironed clothes every day.

Meditate.

Basically live like a monk, but occasionally bang some sloozies on the weekends.

bluntsmokingking · 2014-02-05T11:18:32+00:00

If your smashing the gym and your still miserable, smash it harder.

Speaking from experiance it is literally impossible to feel depressed when you have a good pump on and all those endorphins are pounding around your body. Lift more.

Otherwise dress well, take care of yourself and try not to be alone in your room doing fuck all. If you find yourself in that position, go to the gym and lift more. Stop watching porn, and with your extra free time read "The Rational Mind". Lift more. If you do the above for a few weeks I can guarantee you will feel massively better within yourself, which will then make it easier to approach girls and bang sluts.

Life more.

fiat_lux_ · 2014-02-05T09:00:57+00:00

You're in college. Try to get therapy. I know that gets bashed by a lot of people in this sub. Fuck that.

Therapy can be cheaper than it normally is when you're in college. The therapists will generally be more experienced dealing with college students. Besides that, it's just good to have on record in case something goes wrong. E.g. Suppose you fuck up a semester and need to have the grades purged. You may get leniency from the dean if you show proof of problems and effort to fix.

It's the rational thing to do.

I'll be honest though, therapy didn't help me much (aside from helping expunge one 'C' grade), so additional steps I took were:

lift more
athletics
volunteer work; helping others in need can in turn help you get some perspective
nerd out, study, and go to prof/GSI office hours more; free connection
join a club/activity group (you can meet girls there, if that's your goal besides overcoming depression); I tried dance, which was Ok, but I didn't have time to keep it going.
partying; too bad it was only temporary relief

These are relatively easy things that anyone can try... except maybe athletics. It takes time and commitment to join a team. Even the sports clubs might require fees to join.

2014-02-05T11:33:25+00:00

Depression is a sign that something you are doing is not working. It could be a million things, we cannot tell you. Meditate, be aware of your self-talk, build healthy relationships, stay active, treat yourself with compassion and respect. These things will usually get you far.

DeckofLuckyStrikes · 2014-02-05T07:37:07+00:00

Stop caring about what other people think. Everyone's just running on animal instinct and "reason" (aka, a mental faculty to rationalize instinct).

redpillbanana · 2014-02-05T11:29:08+00:00

Develop a sense of gratitude and appreciation for what you have.

I don't know what your situation is but hopefully there are things you have that you are grateful for. Not being six feet under is one thing. I can't recall who said this: "Every day above ground is a good day."

Make a list of things you are grateful and add to it as you think of more. Then, start every day thinking about these things in the morning when you get up and also think about them at night when you go to bed. Then think about them throughout the day when you remember.

I was in a really dark place once - my life seemed ruined at the time. Once I started going to the gym, that made my body feel better, and I was appreciative of that. I would also go as far as thinking things like, "It feels wonderful just to stand here in the warm morning sunlight and feel the cool breeze against me as I take a deep breath of fresh air," or "This glass of water really hits the spot." Stretching after a good workout, or eating a tasty meal, or taking a nice hot shower after a hard day and laying down in a soft bed - these are all wonderful things that we take for granted. If you have friends or loved ones near you, be appreciative of them as well. You'll eventually find that there are many things in your life that you should be grateful for.

Also, unplug from the media, especially TV and newspapers. They're full of stories and advertising designed to make you feel unsatisfied with your life.

Zackcid · 2014-02-05T16:23:00+00:00

Acceptance. You gotta feed yourself a bit of logic that leads to understanding. The logic being that depression is just part of the bigger Process. You gotta introspect and really ask yourself *why did I delve into this depression?" After you realize that the answer is something along the lines of "broken expectations" or that your mind is breaking down in order to recover into an improved version of yourself.

I'd say this is very similar to the process of building muscle. You push yourself and hit a certain limit where you can't flex your muscles anymore. In order to improve and grow, your body requires a period of physical "depression" (i.e. sore muscles that are in recovery). After concluding this period, you realize that muscles have grown and that you're ready to push yourself again to grow. (i.e. lifting more or wanting to go out to meet people and express your new improved self to the world)

2014-02-05T11:01:43+00:00

Examine what in you're environment is getting you down and can be changed.

Notice what worries you're hanging to. Take responsibility for what you dwell on. Take action to correct your problems.

PinkfloydPurplefloyd · 2014-02-05T13:00:45+00:00

Sometimes depression is just your mind telling you that it doesn't like where you are now. So try look within yourself for something you don't like or have problems with (be it socialisation, feeling dumb after not doing well at school/uni etc.) and try actively work on your problem. Good luck mate.

As an aside, ensuring you get enough fish oil, zinc and vitamin d in your diet can also be beneficial.

Zackcid · 2014-02-05T16:30:36+00:00

It's really important to remind your body that you're worth it. When you're depressed, you're illusioned to believe that you are a worthless piece of shit (in deeper levels of depression anyway). To break out of it, you're brain needs concrete proof to know that those beliefs about yourself are false.

What you have to do is do things that prove you're valuable. So basically taking care of yourself. Shower (I deserve to be clean and fresh always), clean your room (my room is my sanctuary, it would be insulting to have it dirty), hit the gym (I'm so worth it that I deserve to look and feel better), etc.

Eventually, positive feelings take over like confidence and mild narcissism. Have you ever been confident while depressed?

DoxasticPoo · 2014-02-05T16:54:43+00:00

Depression is tough. There are a lot of things that get mixed up in it. But here's a short list of what you need to do.

1) See reality, then make your choices. So much of what depresses people simply boils down to the world not being what they want. You decide you want A, don't get A, and get depressed.

However, if you see that the world only has B, C & D as options, then make your decision, you'll be much happier. Realize that your expectations for reality to match your desires is the main reason you're depressed.

2) Self-hate. By not "being able to get the things you want", you feel like a loser. You hate your Self because you're not the type of person you want to be. And all the emotions that get wrapped up in not getting what you want are difficult to deal with. So you begin to protect yourself from the reality of who you are.

Stop. If you're a loser who can't get a girl, accept it. It's not that big of a deal. If you can't bench 225lbs, do you whine and complain? Do you stop going to the gym? NO! You say, "Ok. How much can I bench?" You start from what you can bench, workout, grow, and maybe eventually you'll get to 2 plates.

But you wouldn't "hate" yourself for not benching 225. Don't "protect" yourself from that fact. Because the only way to get to 2 plates is by starting with what you can bench, then working out.

Same goes with anything. If you're hating yourself, it's because you're not seeing reality. You're hiding from a fact that is actually very useful.

Most of the time people are hiding from some kind of emotion or belief. Don't. Feel them. Know them.

You don't have to hold onto the emotions or even continue believing. But you have to see that somewhere in you, these exist.

You can't change that which you don't know is there.

3) Value your Self. I don't understand how economists have gotten the notion of "value" so wrong. It's not the marginal difference between 2 things. It's not the labor you put into something.

Value is what you're willing to do for something.

If you're not DOING things for yourself, you don't value yourself. Conversely, if you are DOING things for yourself, you WILL start to value yourself.

This is extremely important because we were raised to associate self-esteem and self-worth. And that was a massive mistake. Self-esteem is nifty. But it's not your worth.

By DOING things for yourself, you'll not only start to value yourself, but you'll start to separate your self-esteem from your self-worth. That way when something dings your self-esteem, it doesn't do shit to your self-worth. And it structures your self-worth internally, rather than externally. Self-esteem by definition is dependent on the outside world giving your praise. When you tie your Self-worth to Self-esteem, you are dependent on the outside world for your Self-worth. Stop that. Associating your sense of Self-worth with my definition of value creates a notion of Self-worth that's 100% independent of the outside world. And it gives you complete control.

4) therapy. Sometimes simply talking to someone trained in this shit is all you need. But I suggest a lot of introspection before you go in. Figure out WHY you want therapy and find the right person.

Bostonsboy306 · 2014-02-05T20:10:05+00:00

It can always be done through natural means, you just need to take initiative.

IMO Antidepressants are for the weak. Everyone has the ability to overcome their depression naturally (lifting, setting goals, consulting with friends and family, etc.).

I had developed horrible depression when I moved to Germany last September. I had been away from home for extended periods of time (college) but I had tons of friends around and was only a few hour drive from my hometown. The fact that I was alone in a foreign country, with no friends or family, partnered with roughly 7 hours of daylight was a recipe for mental catastrophe.

I wanted nothing more than to just return home to my comfort zone. I did everything I could to dull the pain (booze, cigs) but i never touched SSRIs, I knew that slope was way too slippery.

As the weeks progressed I began lifting hard again. I was still smoking because I fucked around enough to become addicted, so cigs became a secondary coping mechanism. I also followed a strict meal plan, laid off booze and meditated every night.

By the time I returned home in December, I could almost physically feel the impact those four months had had on my frame of mind. I was seeing my home environment in a completely new light. I learned to cherish my family and friends much more. It was much easier to distinguish my real friends from fake. I was also able to see through bullshit that I had never been able to in the past. Daily reading of TRP had helped with that.

I guess what in saying is; a period of depression can be a time for growth. It has more than likely been triggered by some kind of change or transition, which equals you being out of your usual comfort zone. If you want to grow as a person, you NEED to spend time out of your comfort zone.

It may be hard, but power through it. Be as productive as possible. You will come out a better man.

Every storm runs out of rain.

2014-02-05T20:12:48+00:00

Cold showers help immensely.

Deano101 · 2014-02-05T10:07:23+00:00

Cease consuming sugar, then load up on vitamin D supplements, omega oils, multi-vitamins. Here in UK/Ireland we never get enough sun due to the shitty climate. But depressed people are never outdoors either (most people who work in offices are under fluorescent lighting all day = no sun too).

Radical_unit · 2014-02-05T11:02:43+00:00

Stop fapping.

abutterfly · 2014-02-05T16:05:29+00:00

Ooh, I can help out here.

First of all, despite that it's not a popular suggestion around here, it's really hard to beat depression without consistently seeing a therapist. Introspection is incredibly important, but when the only point of view you have is tainted by corruption, it can make diagnosing your issues much harder. So get thee to any kind of shrink, really. I would, in fact, try to avoid antidepressants.

/u/fiat_lux_ is right in that it's also a safety net for college performance issues. I had to rely on it once myself.

Get a hobby! Something productive. Vidya games are fun but they will ONLY exacerbate the problem right now. The easier the initial learning curve is, the better off you'll be.

For days when the bad gets worse, smoke some weed. This is another one that will draw some flak, because generally TRP wants you to be lucid, and I agree. But you don't have to be stoned off your ass to start feeling better. A little buzz can very easily take the edge off of everyday life that depression typically drops on you. I strongly recommend vaporizing instead of combustion if it's financially viable for you.

haxorroxor · 2014-02-05T14:51:10+00:00

Eat bananas.

6TLaRm4g · 2014-02-05T14:53:23+00:00

Stop watching porn.

No_disintegrations · 2014-02-05T15:12:17+00:00

Regulating your sleep schedule helps as well. Use something like sleepyti.me to get adequate sleep each night, and stick to it. For me, my day is dictated by how I wake up in the morning.

musicvita25 · 2014-02-05T15:19:14+00:00

Appreciate life has its ups and downs. There is a balance, but man when its good, its fucking great.

2014-02-05T15:22:02+00:00

Have you considered seeing a psychiatrist? I had severe depression and social anxiety disorder in college. I tried everything to break free from its grasp but ultimately I needed intervention from a doctor.

It was the best decision I ever made.

Herb-Eversmells · 2014-02-05T16:09:44+00:00

As someone who used to lurk there, posts like these are WAY more helpful than what goes on in /Depression (although their sidebar is great if you really are on the edge.) Just to add: something like 60 percent of suicides are at least in part due to relationship issues. I think TRP can help in that area.

Keep the good advice up guys, we all need help sometimes.

Blalubb · 2014-02-05T17:06:12+00:00

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOAgplgTxfc Watch this. Get an appointment with a psychiatrist and get antidepressants.

minuscipher · 2014-02-05T17:10:11+00:00

Going through shit myself and honestly its tough but you have to remember things that work for others may not work for you; find yourself again. Do the things you love, hang out with the guys, stop living in no your head and make the most of what you have. Push yourself to get more if you aren't satisfied, never settle and strive to be the best and get the best. Don't stop thinking about what you want and it's not selfish because in the end you have to live with yourself for the rest of your life.

I'll leave you with two quotes that have been on my mind lately:

"I'm not going to tell you things are going to get better because they won't, you'll get better." -paraphrase a scene from Louie

"You just keep pushing. You just keep pushing. I made every mistake that could be made. But I just kept pushing." -Rene Descartes

2014-02-05T17:20:01+00:00

depression never really goes away. but usually it doesn't really bother you a lot. and its just fancy self flagellation when it comes down to it.

also - almost everyone has it to some extent starting from teenage. don't be the guy who is defined by it (certain depressing online places and a certain html game about depression made by a tumblr feminist just created a huge shitfest in tandem)

thedarkerside · 2014-02-05T19:09:49+00:00

What /u/RedSunBlue says is a good start. Also: Get a routine. Get up at a decent time, go to bed at a decent time. Avoid alcohol (it's a depressant).

I have had phases of depression as well. Some were hormonal, others just life. Having a schedule / cycle helps tremendously. Besides the Gym I also have the tendency to either ride my bike around or just go for extended walks (usually with an audio book to keep my mind occupied).

N3vertheless · 2014-02-05T20:42:32+00:00

In my experience there is only one way to overcome depression. You have to have hope. That hope can not be in women or any other relationship for that matter. It has to be hope that you can achieve something you want. Do you want to be respected? Start with the top comment here, do little things; but none of that will matter unless you find something that YOU love doing. You need a goal man.

kidheartless · 2014-02-05T20:58:00+00:00

This video is really helpful. I know it's long (like 30 minutes), but it's solid gold - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i1sLcvDMhFw

It can really help you reframe how you view your life. The part at 13:19 I found the most helpful.

limbooo · 2014-02-05T21:10:41+00:00

Depresion. Its like I know that there are things that make me happy and that lifes worth living. But I feel like I'm stuck in a hole and feel that things are just to much for me. I've let depression rob me of a lot of things already and I keep sinking.

RPthrowaway123 · 2014-02-06T02:22:41+00:00

As someone who has suffered from depression in the past here's my advice. Depression gnaws at your feeling of self-worth. I used to think that I was worthless because no girls wanted to talk to me. And that would be part of a vicious circle where I felt worthless, and girls could read that in me and they would dismiss me because of it. So while it might seem like the hardest thing in the world, you need to find that self-worth. That positivity has to come from within you; no women can give it to you. Going to the gym is part of it. Work on your body and be fucking proud of it. Find things you enjoy, and they could be anything. Personally I discovered a love of music and speakers, which led me to build my own surround sound system and get a reputation for installing aftermarket headunits in my friend's cars. I also built my own computer, learned how to change my own oil, and started keeping fish. All of these hobbies gave me something to take pride in. When I use my computer, or listen to music, or watch my fish tank I think to myself I made that and I'm proud of myself. Nobody can give you that pride, you have to create it.

So I guess the bottom line of my advice is: go out and do things! Depression sits inside of your head and makes you waste away. It saps your strength until you don't want to do anything. Don't let it. Fight back and make yourself strong again!

zeffydotnet · 2014-02-05T13:50:52+00:00

Start doing things you want to do... carve some time for yourself to relax and improve. Gym, hiking etc. The goal is do things that make your body feel better AND give you the space to think and realize that life goes on.

wasrackart · 2014-02-05T17:25:41+00:00

If you find yourself feeling down, find something productive to do.

Go for a walk. Turn on some of your favorite music. Become aware of negative thought patterns. Read a book you've been meaning to get to. Cook some healthy tasty food.

SomersetRaglan · 2014-02-05T09:46:27+00:00

Trycyclics, SSRIs, SNRIs, MOAIs, and CBT. Just not all at the same time.

cero · 2014-02-05T07:34:09+00:00

If you are in a deep depression the only thing that will help is time or anti-depressives.

If the depression is not deep but still present, imo, you can alleviate it by actively willing to end the depression.

Depression is the result of altered brain chemistry and you can consciously alter brain chemistry by envoking positive thoughts and behaviour.

I know how it sounds, but it worked for me. Spend the next 20 minutes on just one thought: I DON'T WANT TO BE DEPRESSED ANYMORE. When you get sidetracked, get back to the mantra.

Smile while you're doing this. Raise your hands in a victory pose. Imagine you've reached the summit of the Everest.

By doing this you are changing pathways and habitual thoughtprocessess allowing you to pull yourself out of the depression.

Good luck!

asaspade5 · 2014-02-05T13:30:17+00:00

Wait wait...David deida's "way of the superior man"....download the audiobook and play it with classical music in the background. Good shit.

ayjayred · 2014-02-05T14:12:12+00:00

How do you guys overcome depression excluding the gym?

Youre not lifting hard enough and not frequent enough. Gym should give you more than enough endorphins. Lift heavy, but with proper form.

Title	Overcoming depression
Author	getintheVans
Upvotes	41
Comments	76
Date	February 5, 2014 7:16 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1x2bup/overcoming_depression/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/overcoming-depression.10926 https://theredarchive.com/post/10926

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