Joint finances ?

sexyshoulderdevil · 2017-05-19T03:53:50+00:00

For us, all the income is mixed together. Start tracking your expenses on a monthly basis. Literally figure out your monthly outflows. I keep it simple as possible and track it on a spreadsheet. Figure out how much is left over each month. If it's not a lot, figure out how to make it more by analyzing expenses and watching how much you're spending on a daily basis. Make a goal how much money you want your net worth to increase each year from savings. Wrap your spending decisions around this goal.

My wife makes a lot of money. But it's all Monopoly money to her. She knows I watch our finances like a hawk and it makes her feel at ease she doesn't have to think about it.

If your wife makes more than you, it's irrelevant. It's only an issue if you make it an issue and act a like a little bitch who gives a shit. Be a man with a plan with regards to your finances and it's all good. Your money doesn't make her attracted to you. Your masculine strength, leadership, and charisma does the trick...

FireTempered · 2017-05-19T05:48:01+00:00

Nothing is simpler than to keep your finances separate. The only thing joint IMO, would be a joint bill paying account, but only if that solves more issues than it creates.

redmountainpill · 2017-05-19T04:04:03+00:00

We do a joint account and we have separate accounts too. My wife is pretty stingy so I don't worry too much about what she does. If she got out of control I'd separate our accounts completely and make her feel the pinch

dandar4600 · 2017-05-19T13:01:32+00:00

We have a joint account. Always did as when we got married we were both living paycheck to paycheck. I started earning more, now she caught up and some weeks even earns more. I pay mortgages (we own couple of properties,) loans are on autopay, so is cell, electric and cable. She pays miscellaneous store cc bills and watches over our checking account. I do our taxes. You could say it's 50/50 partnership.

When we first got married I did all the bills, and would get pissed off at the lack of cash and her spending as she didn't know how much in the red we were. I sold my new car then got an old beater, she took over finances. We stopped fighting and got out of the red.

Having said that, she is very good with saving up for projects. If I see we have 5+K in the bank I'm starting thinking of motorcycles, exhaust systems and car audio. She's thinking about updating bathrooms, kitchen, patio. So we use our joint checking for living and bills and she uses her cash business for saving and I don't see that money until suddenly we have $7K to spend on a new bathroom.

It works for us, but then again a lot of women are not like my wife and many are SAHM who do not bring in any income. I see how many here struggle to take over all control of finances but I don't see the pressing need for it in my marriage.

number123356 · 2017-05-19T04:33:10+00:00

I prefer to keep it separate. Everyone pays equally die Community Stuff (water, Energy, internet, grocery) privat bills are paid seperatly.

mattizie · 2017-05-19T11:04:51+00:00

Does anyone here do joint finances with their wife ? How does that work out ? BONUS: does anyone have a wife that makes more than them? How do your finances work here ? How do you find ways to remain the captain when you aren't the breadwinner ?

My wife set up her own business (now company) after we were married. Just last week she made a small business deal that earned her about 200k.

I still work full time as an engineer on a 60k salary.

We have our finances separate. And I want to keep it that way.

Our situation is a bit strange, we live in separate coutnries, she moved here while while we had our baby, then moved back to her country (China) where her company is located, due to financial reasons (my wage isn’t enough to support a family in Australia). I’ll be moving there, hopefully keeping my current job, in the near future. I’m 5’9, big glasses, patchy facial hair, 80kg, 20% bf, I describe myself as a 7/10, similar to this. No genetic lottery here.

I moved out at an early age, and am used to living a fairly "poor" lifestyle. If anything happens, if my wife steps out of line, I'm out. I didn't marry my wife, nor stay married to her, for the money. I married her because she's was faithful, family-orientated, fucking hot, and had traits that lead me to believe she’s be a great mother for our eventual children. She’s not your mother, she doesn’t look after you in that way. She’s your wife, she cooks, rears children, and fucks. A good business career doesn’t make her a better cook, dominance in the workplace doesn’t help breastfeeding, and all the money in the world won’t make her sexier or better in the bedroom.

It’s not easy. You have to pull strong game, you have to give no fucks. I’ve been in arguments with her where I’ve walked away. She got really pissed off at me because I said I wanted to DNA test our kid (I have no reason to believe she would cheat, I mean she’s not getting anything else out of me), I walked away, that night she asked me to apologise, I wouldn’t, she got pissed. Shit got violent. I grabbed my passport, her suitcase that I started filling with my shit, and 4k of her cash she had on the table, and walked the fuck out of the appartment, “that’s my money and suitcase”, “I don’t give a shit, mine now”. I get to the elevator, and she starts crying and apologises, just wants me to come back inside. “I’m going to a hotel, I’ll call you in the morning”, more begging. I see that she’s no longer on the offensive, and genuinly wants to put it behind us. We go back, I’m still pissed, but I fuck her the next morning (note, I’m fucking her, that’s the proper mentality), she’s happy, everything is fine again. I haven’t got my kid tested yet, not sure if it’s because I don’t think it’s worth it, or I bitched out, but he’s a carbon copy of me (with her nose), and I have no reason (apart from AWALT) to think I’m not the biological father.

Another instance I had we got into an argument, call it what it was, it was a shit-test, but it involved driving and I’m passionate about that, so I failed. We agree to divorce. We were overseas, I had no cash on me at the time, so I say sure so long as you buy me a ticket back to my home country, and taxi ride to the airport, cause I got no cash on me. She agrees, but wants me to put it in writing that after I leave I can’t come back to sue her for her assets (divorce rape). I take a pen and paper and start writing.

“I, Mattizie, do divorce my bitch of a wife, [Wife’s full name], on the condition that I get: 1) a paid for flight home, 2) a paid taxi to the airport, 3) no child support/alimony owed to my soon to be ex wife. The divorce may be considered finalised when I have safely arrived back to Australia. Signed Mattizie [Mattizie’s signature], dated. [Wife’s full name] [space for wifey’s signature].”

Give it back to her, she starts reading. “you can’t call me a bitch”, “you’re acting like a bitch, I write that you’re a bitch”, “write it again”, “no”, *starts crying* “but I don’t want to be a bitch” (submission), “come over here”. Hug, kiss. Everything’s fine again. “You’re not going to leave me are you?” (comfort test), “Honey, no other man could put up with and handle half of your shit, let alone do what I do. It’s going to take a lot more than one stupid little argument to lose me”.

Co-workers have asked me why I still work, or why I don’t want to work for her company instead. I tell them that it’s independence: as long as I work, and don’t work for her, I can leave her any time I want. And that always has to be in the back of her head to keep her hamster spinning. She has to think that I’ll leave at any moment if she fucks up (and I will if she cheats, but that will be cold and calculated). This may be a bit of emotional stress for her, but it keeps us all happy, and a bit of beta balances it out.

I’ll be moving to China in the near future so that we can be together again. I’ll probably need to up my game even further, but we’ll see how it goes.

TurdDoctor · 2017-05-19T11:38:52+00:00

My wife makes about twice what I make, and I do pretty well. We both run our own business. She handles her business account and I run my business account and all personal finances. It's more work for me but I like the leadership and it just makes more sense that way. How can you plan for retirement separately? I handle all the taxes and it would be so much harder if she had her own personal account. She can buy whatever she wants so maybe she doesn't feel threatened by me handling everything personal. You would have to earn the trust of your wife over time and not screw things up and then maybe it would be okay to combine. Good luck

aditas · 2017-05-19T11:55:19+00:00

n o joint anything. DO NOT LET ANYONE in your wallet.

UEMcGill · 2017-05-19T13:30:17+00:00

We have joint finances, and everything is in my name. Simple.

brotherpotatos · 2017-05-20T11:50:35+00:00

We have a joint checking, and I do all the finances and bookkeeping. We have numerous accounts due to business/multiple properties and revenue streams. 90% of our money goes into the main joint account and is disseminated from there. My wife is pretty good at following my directions, but I cut her some slack. If she goes shopping for clothes she is not unreasonable, I monitor all purchases, but if its not obscene I don't say anything. She does have about $500 a month from a premarital settlement going to a separate account, and I have asked her to transfer the deposit over to the joint account, which she is stalling on, but not arguing against. In the mean time, she writes me a check to edeposit, but usually there's a couple hundred form that I haven't accounted for. Bottom line, I make the rules and she listens, but I give her some grey area and some room where I am not watching everything she does. She likes that I am in command of the money and is confident in my decisions, and the leeway I give her she sees as a reward that I can take away if she fucks up. It all necessitates my responsibility as well. If I make a superfluous purchase, like coming home with a $60 nerf gun for the sole purpose of asking after dinner if anyone wants dessert, and pulling it out from where I had it hidden and blasting my wife and the baby and the older boy, well then, she will take that as license to go get a mani-pedi the next day or buy extra smoothies for a week or generally be wasteful. So I need to set the example for responsible use of money. I need to give her some rgey area to operate in. And I absolutely require her respect of the system that I implement. If she did not respect it, we would not be married for long.

weakandsensitive · 2017-05-19T05:51:03+00:00

i'm a real man so I pay for everything.

Title	Joint finances ?
Author	Bored1444
Upvotes	2
Comments	33
Date	May 19, 2017 3:17 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/6c16af/joint_finances/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/joint-finances.206134 https://theredarchive.com/post/206134

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