Tips for the interim?

bogeyd6 · 2017-06-06T20:16:53+00:00

Do what the rest of us did. Spend time in the gym pumping iron, figure out your diet, calculate your financial situation, and work on your social situation.

justpickanyusername · 2017-06-06T20:55:23+00:00

STFU is good advice. Treat this time as training or a boot camp of sorts. You are now fully aware of a war that threatens everything about you and you are itching to get into the battle and claim victory. Problem is that without proper fitness and training you will likely get shot which will either kill you, set you back unnecessarily, or nuke an otherwise salvageable relationship with your own stupidity.

Think of it this way. You were likely a beta bitch for years prior to discovering MRP like most of us here. What difference does a few extra weeks longer make of continuing to be a beta bitch? Start identifying shit tests etc and it is okay not to address them initially. STFU and if you spill out BP puke rather than smooth RP responses just take that disgust you feel within yourself as motivation to improve and to get better next time around. You start seeing the things you have read play out in front of you.

Start identifying pitches. Then try making contact with them. Next, start hitting singles. Pretty soon doubles, triples, and home runs will start becoming more consistent and the norm. Just don't start swinging for the fences right off of the bat. Many of the FR's you will see are about guys that have been in the RP big leagues for a while now and are writing about their home runs and perfectly pitched ball games. Something to aspire to and learn from, but rookies typically can't make that jump right away.

You can't sit on the sidelines forever, but just make sure you understand the rules of the engagement before you start aiming your gun around. Once you gain confidence start working the process in slowly, but very deliberately without wavering.

BirdManBrrrr · 2017-06-06T21:42:46+00:00

Still new to this but the following have helped me:

Lift.
Start to become aware of your behavior, especially how you react emotionally to things she says and does. You need to be self aware before you can fix things. Your awareness of DEERing is a good start.
STFU on every level. Not only shit tests, but DO NOT ATTEMPT TO DISCUSS YOUR PROBLEMS WITH HER. Even if its something that doesn't involve her directly. Talk to someone else if you have to vent and/or handle shit yourself.
Start to live your life like you're single. Do shit you like to do, build your life outside of the marriage with activities, friends, etc. Do not be afraid to do things alone and don't delay because nobody else will join you...just do shit.
Related to doing shit- Don't ask for permission, just go and do.
Read Saving A Low Sex Marriage early. The book put a lot of structure around the process that made every other book and concept come together.
Internalize that you alone are responsible for you, and you alone are responsible for your relationship. Become proactive, not reactive.
Identify and work on fixing health/mental health issues/etc if you have them.

Couples counseling or break up or continue being miserable.

Don't post on /r/relationships ever again. That advice is completely passive and utterly useless; you're here like everyone else who wants to fix their relationship while what is needed is for every man here to fix himself.

Fix you, the rest will figure itself out.

drty_pr · 2017-06-07T00:17:33+00:00

Say your wife says: "Het-Masteen, I'm so sick of the way you don't clean behind the toaster when you wipe the counter!"

Your options are:

A) "I'm sorry I don't clean behind the toaster like you do. I'm busy enough trying to clean the mess you left making dinner, getting the kids lunches ready and I still have to give the kids a shower!" don't do this - deer

B) "Oh, I didn't notice I missed that spot" said with a smooth smile - fog

C) "Right! I'll also clean behind the stove while I'm at it!" as you proceed to drag the stove out like a maniac and clean behind it. If she isn't laughing, you didn't do it right - AA

D) "If I cleaned behind the taoster, then I'd literally eb doing everything in the fuckin kitchen!". Also done with a smile so she knows you're joking. - AM

But since you are new and have no frame, these methods will look stupid

E) Don't say shit. Continue cleaning the kitchen the way you were. If she tries to engage you like a dumb bitch, finish what you were doing and leave. - STFU

screechhater · 2017-06-07T04:44:37+00:00

Lift is the first thing.

Take stock of your behavior when you met her and started dating. Were you deaf, dumb and mute ? Most likely not. Did you have a life ? Or, did she replace momma ? Well, if she did your fucked, but hopefully not.

So, what was on your mind the first moment or the day before you met her ? The next porn spanking session ?

Anyway, most likely you were a man going through life not waiting for her to wave her magic wand so you could go clean your bowels. So how about, grabbing some of that past like beers with buddies, hobbies, etc. get the fuck out from under her thumb and stop loving your love on the edge of your seat, with, "what if she does this ?" Who gives ten fucks ?

rocknrollchuck · 2017-06-06T21:47:44+00:00

Here's a perfect definition of how to avoid going Rambo

GargantuaBlarg29 · 2017-06-07T15:54:00+00:00

You are feeling anxious to solve the problem now. Know that this will take months/years to solve. So if you take a month and read and build yourself up, and STFU...What's one more month of failed shit tests.

Your goal right now is you. Building up a lifting routine, reading, internalizing, and shutting up. That should be more than enough to keep you busy.

red_blue_and_hot · 2017-06-06T19:57:11+00:00

STFU. Lift. Read. Repeat.

creating_my_life · 2017-06-06T20:36:36+00:00

STFU is the short answer.

When I was first reading MRP, I would STFU, but then work through the situation in my mind. I'd read the sidebar books (knowledge), and read askmrp/asktrp for sample scenarios (application). Eventually you'll start to get it.

Just go slow. It's really all about you anyways.

BobbyPeru · 2017-06-06T21:12:04+00:00

I am doing and STFU which I need to work on)

You answered your own question. Expect shit tests, and mentally prepare to STFU for now... Visualize it. Get comfortable with that discomfort. Then, start mixing in some A&A, AM, and fogging.

cholomite · 2017-06-06T22:06:28+00:00

Get really good at cooking chicken

stonepimpletilists · 2017-06-07T15:19:21+00:00

Keep fucking things up and learning from them.

Eventually, you stop fucking them up, and get good at them. Also, be hawt as fuck as quickly as possible

BluepillProfessor · 2017-06-07T16:31:15+00:00

Lift.

Title	Tips for the interim?
Author	Het-Masteen
Upvotes	1
Comments	31
Date	June 6, 2017 7:54 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/6foajn/tips_for_the_interim/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/tips-for-the-interim.206052 https://theredarchive.com/post/206052

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