When should i escalate into violence?

Efficient_Film_149 · 2021-03-30T20:44:51+00:00

Let me tell you a beautiful story. Gather round children, gather round... there was once a young man who’s girl was being hit on. Young man couldn’t possibly be a beta, so he engaged in a fight. Little did he know his opponent had friends. Three friends stomped today’s hero out for being a hardo. As he was laying on the ground being kicked I wonder if the thought ever crossed his mind if it was worth it. The only thought that crossed my mind was wow... this poor kid just got stomped fighting over his girlfriend who’s being getting fucked in the ass by my buddy behind his back.

That day I learned. I will NEVER fight over a girl.

frognads · 2021-03-30T20:27:04+00:00

When you're in the military fighting in a conflict.

Dont waste your fucking energy on this kind of dumb bullshit. Real Gs dont fuck around with small time nonsense

soltanparham · 2021-03-30T20:12:02+00:00

No pussy is worth going to hospital or sending someone to hospital and going to jail!
no pussy is worth going to court and then paying some motherfucker your money just cause there's a bitch who's the fucking judge and says you shouldn't have fought !
_
i try to stay away from the fight unless i'm 100000% sure i can escape without getting caught by fucking police after hitting a guy

cunningcaring · 2021-03-30T19:44:44+00:00

Never. Violence is for children. Grow up Unless you want to spend prison time.

scardy_cat_ · 2021-03-31T08:02:23+00:00

Such pussy answers in here. I wouldn’t be the first to escalate but I wouldn’t tolerate that kind of disrespect. It’s better to be beaten up for standing up for yourself than to be a coward. Those guys picked on you because they saw that you had weak body language. If you had gone crazy and wanted to fight them there’s a huge chance they would have backed off. This whole thing about them having knifes or guns is just speculation. If they pulled out weapons then I would say to get the hell out of there. Also you’re not afraid of going to jail for beating up the guy. Don’t lie to yourself. You’re just a coward. Your girl told you because she wanted you to be the man and you failed. I’m sure even if it was only one guy you would have backed off.

mindbreeder · 2021-03-30T22:30:10+00:00

If you're being threatened. I never understood guys that let it go so far before realizing they are in a physical confrontation.

If you are threatening violence on me, I mean physically not verbally, then I escalate immediately. Example, pushing me, getting right im in my face, etc.

At that point I have already tried to deescalate and obviously it has not worked. I know myself, I know Im gonna do a whole hell of a lot to deescalate before it gets to there. If none of that has worked I'm now in a fight whether I like it or not.

Don't let him swing on you first, don't even let him up in your face.

This kinda shit has happened to me prob 20 times in my life, the vast majority was easily deescalated an no fight occurred.

halleluiaiaia9292 · 2021-03-30T19:47:02+00:00

No reaction is warranted when guys comment a girl or your girl without doing it ON PURPOSE in front of you.

Who cares? Dont play white knight.

I could however see a case for violence/reacting if they did it on purpose to provoke you. For example “hey! Mind if we bang your girl?” Or something.

But even in that case the best initial reaction is to be witty, this will put them off balance.

robowalkers3 · 2021-03-31T01:10:53+00:00

Preferably never, whenever encountering violence with strangers, always ask yourself, am I willing to kill this man over this? Why? Because that's what it might escalate to, who's to say if you punch them and they knock you out that they won't just take out a knife and stab you to death. Do you expect some referee to make sure they don't go over the line? In a street fight with strangers, you don't know what people are capable of. Try to walk away and deescalate.

"Hey I appreciate the compliment guys, got her all by myself without any help!"

Verbal judo can avoid you or them going to to hospital or dealing with lawyers or jail.

If the deescalation doesn't work violence is unavoidable, be an honorable man in control of his emotions and only engage in violence that stops them as a threat. If they get knocked out, don't keep hitting them while they are down, or if they back down and apologize, don't try to chase them and escalate into violence.

EDIT: You could always carry an OC Spray. It can take out two or three (possibly even more) people and make them stop escalating any violence while protecting you legally. OC Spray/Pepper spray has less justification then say a gun does. I actually carry pepper spray on me every day for stray dogs or muggers.

GetChillGetThrills · 2021-03-30T21:04:01+00:00

If they grab your gf ass just grab their ass.

But seriously, just got bigger, they weren't scared of you.

Big = scary = leave you alone.

mrsmiley831 · 2021-03-30T23:08:51+00:00

I would only get violent if they were to physically try to hurt her or myself. Guys catcalling my girlfriend would just get the "too bad she's with me, but thanks for the compliment" look or just ignored. Be non reactive and hold frame.

W_O_M_B_A_T · 2021-03-31T06:28:14+00:00

It's a simple question, mate. Does doing a month or two in jail at least, losing your job, and a lengthy trial process sound like a decent tradeoff?

Three against one? Who are the witnesses there going to implicate?

Does a week in the hospital and a massive medical bill sound good?

If not, then then tell the hothead they're entitled to their opinions, then just walk away. Grab your girlfriends elbow if she's around though I wouldn't waste your breath doing it. Voting with your feet and walking away costs you nothing.

michael1962-01 · 2021-03-31T07:45:05+00:00

Remember

ISOLATE
escalate
penetrate.

Avoid group dynamics

DatRiggz · 2021-04-01T01:21:03+00:00

One of my buddies did 10 years for a bar fight gone bad where he ended up killing the guy. Is years of your life worth a box that'll branch swing while your incarcerated?

benhurensohn · 2021-03-30T19:40:40+00:00

If you know it's stupid, then why do you post here?

MyMaestrom · 2021-03-30T19:48:11+00:00

You reacted correctly don't worry about it. Being a man is risky sometimes. You didn't eat shit, but also didn't escalate. Some sons of bitches catcall your girl and she tells you this- imagine just accepting it and saying haha no biggie. You'd get killed if you fought, by verbal escalation you chose a correct 3rd approach.

Simple-Craft-9577 · 2021-03-30T20:09:33+00:00

Call the cops the next time. I’m assuming that it’s a criminal offence to make sexually colored remarks at someone

DoItForDalebaby · 2021-03-30T20:31:50+00:00

Yeah like I guess it’s cool to sometimes to be able to beat someone’s ass if they deserve it, but then you end up beating ass then you’ve got an assault charge. Like in many ways the system is still rigged against you in this situation. I’m sure you like your girl and all but if she ever decides to leave you over some shit like that because she likes the cat calls and validation. I would just let it be because probation is fucking lame as shit. Take it from me I was on it for 3 years. You can’t do anything and if you fuck up while on Probo that’s just another reason for the man to keep you in the system. Idk at the end of the day you’re gonna do what your gonna do but just try to not throw all your logic out the window just because some other dickhead said something to your women. Not worth. Stay safe king.

heathrowaway678 · 2021-03-30T21:30:36+00:00

Are you part of the KuKluxKlan or why are you white knighting?

Returnofthemack3 · 2021-03-31T05:21:10+00:00

Unless you're in actual danger and have no choice, I wouldn't personally recommend fighting ever. Too many variables and shit can go wrong fast. If a bitch is upset I didn't fight for her, she's definitely not one to keep. Just my two cents

Also a sexual gesture isn't anything man. Pretty girls deal with that and cat calling semi frequently, so at worst I'd just laugh it off or say something patronizing as you move on.

tetrachromancy · 2021-04-01T06:15:23+00:00

You should sign up for BJJ or another combat martial art. That will teach you various lessons around fighting.

In general, it’s not worth getting your ass beat by a bunch of thugs over a woman. Especially if she’s not in physical danger.

BavarianAlpha97 · 2021-03-30T20:17:46+00:00

Yes, f them. I had done the same thing

Title	When should i escalate into violence?
Author	IndividualLanky4080
Upvotes	13
Comments	77
Date	March 30, 2021 7:39 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/mgo4qz/when_should_i_escalate_into_violence/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/when-should-i-escalate-into-violence.766308 https://theredarchive.com/post/766308

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