Ok, first of all let me say that I am a little frustrated, so sorry for my tone.

I have been suffering from social anxiety for all my life and only now I am trying to "explore the human relationship", daring to be more open with people.

Basically yes, I'm pushing myself out of the comfort zone in order to understand how to be more friendly, confident and not being seen anymore as "socially awkward, creep or lonely".

Going to dance techno in a club for me is like entering in an arena: although I know that nobody gives a shit about me and that we are just bodies moving together, I feel pretty judged from people and I am shy.

Anyway, all these premises to just say that from my anecdotal experience asking directly for consent never works. On the contrary, every time that I tried to be polite and asked a girl if she wanna dance not only I have been always rejected, but also they looked at me like the "creepy guy" and I feel ashamed. Someone even made fun of me saying "did you seriously asked me if I wanna dance? Come on"

I read many comments of girls in these subs writing that they would definitely prefer a boy asking them for consent, instead of just directly make physical contact and dance, but for my experience it never works.

Actually, the few times that I was able to dance with girls were when I started immediately to dance with them, from the side of from the back, and avoided that first verbal approach.

I am not saying that you should not care about consent! I'm just saying that at this point I'm starting to believe that you shouldn't ask directly for verbal consent but try to "understand" if there is consent only through non verbal communication like eye contact and physical escalation.

What are your thoughts about it? Although here on reddit a lot of girls say that they prefer a person asking if they wanna dance, from my experience asking for consent will always produce a negative reaction.

Or maybe I am just unlucky, I don't know.

TL:DR: Asking to a girl if she wanna dance never worked for me. Instead, directly dancing with her and see if she reciprocate is more socially accepted.