I tried shooting my shot and It didn’t work - now I feel worthless.

slenderman404 · 2022-01-14T03:53:26+00:00

Him rejecting doesn't make you any less. It is just the fact that maybe you are not his type and it is not personal. I am sure there are people out there who thinks you are absolutely gorgeous. Look at it this way. When you try to do a jigsaw puzzle and one piece don't fit into another, does that make those pieces less valuable? No, the pieces just need to find the correct match.

Dm me and we can talk more about it if you like :)

appmanga · 2022-01-14T04:37:12+00:00

If you're going to pursue guys you have to be strong enough to handle rejection. Someone passing on you, or even flaking on you, is not a death sentence; it's just another form of "No".

I'm quite sure you're worthy of being desired, but what I say shouldn't be the thing that matters. You have to feel this about you.

Have you considered counseling? It can be very helpful and you'd be getting feedback by someone who's interacting with you person-to-person, face-to-face. You can't expect someone else to love you in a healthy way if you can't do that for yourself, and you can learn to do that.

ismellwithmyeyes · 2022-01-14T03:54:54+00:00

First of all; Sorry to hear that...

Do not (never ever ever) worry about your internet-persona if it comes to situations like these...

It is not Face-To-Face and it is not honest... You can not tell, how ppl act in a real life situation - Their online behavior always differs...

Besides, it is almost impossible to look as good as influencers/Celebs or normal ppl who use filters and shit...

The main "Life Wisdom" is to start loving yourself/your appearance and most important your character...

You are working on yourself and you are getting more and more confident... You are self aware...

Ohh and - Remember the first time you cooked? it was awful, wasn't it? You ate it but it is was simply to bad to invite other ppl over right? Have you stopped cooking? Nope. You learned about your taste and what you need to do, in order to make a good meal... Same thing goes for you...

OuchCharlieOw · 2022-01-14T05:16:51+00:00

You’re not worthless.

creativeoutlaw44 · 2022-01-14T04:34:04+00:00

Read "The Book of Pook"

https://bookofpook.com/

Your emotions are completely valid, but they do not control you. Change your mind and shift your life accordingly.

There is NO shame in failing, only in not trying.

-Kast- · 2022-01-14T04:45:55+00:00

Instagram is a terrible way to genuinely connect with someone... and you should understand that the people who do well on it have everything down to science and it's all filtered.

Just like you wouldn't walk up to your romantic interest wearing old jeans and a stained up tee, you shouldn't try to slide into someone's DMs if you dont have a great IG.

Just saying, unless you have a curated IG, it's a terrible way to try to generate interest. If you're going to try this approach, you may want to have some professional photos done or take some photography classes.

BreakinLiberty · 2022-01-14T07:07:47+00:00

Did you even message him? Or just followed and expected him to say something?

A women being blunt can be sexy,

Like message and be like “hey i think you’re kind of cute we should hang out or get to know each other”

Men rarely hear those words

Unless you followed some celebrity with a blue check mark then it’s probably not gonna work out

Wind_Piercer · 2022-01-14T14:57:39+00:00

I would like to say that you’re definitely not worthless, every good human is worth it, even if u only have a head with walking tentacles. I’ve seen lots of very very not good looking women around me get the love of their lives from very successful men because they we’re nice and good hearted, and worked on themselves. Women that we’re envied by the more beautiful ones. Tell ur self tht its just not the moment and beleive tht one day you’ll find a person for you, just dont push it, its like breathing if u think abt it it becomes heavy..

mafiosomonkey · 2022-01-14T09:26:55+00:00

This is what’s called an external locus of control, allowing our self worth to be determined by something that’s external to ourselves. I think before you move too far forward blindly , try to develop an internal locus , where you understand your self worth. That the only thing you can control in this world is the way you feel about something. Almost every interaction and you you feel about it can be distilled down to Power, threat and meaning Power is your locus of control, how you feel about something. Threat is the fear of rejection in this case, am I not worthy of love And meaning is the meaning you apply to that rejection. Let me say now. Work on your internal power then the threats are not an issue and the meaning is he’s just not the guy for me…. Jog on and find someone who is worthy of you.

DisneyUp · 2022-01-14T14:15:01+00:00

It’s possible he accepted not based on what you looked like but thinking he knew you, accepted went through your roll, realised he didn’t and de followed. It may be nothing to do with what you actually look like.

I do understand how men seemingly just wanting our bodies does affect the human psyche after a while. To many it should be the ultimate boost but it does dent confidence in those seeking more of an emotional uplift.

My point is, there are so many women (and men) that feel utterly worthless because of the knock on effect of mismatched goals. Some people are just looking to use you or be used. When we meet those types we take it personally but actually what they were looking for (minus exceptions) won’t change regardless of how good we look or how great our personalities are. It likely won’t change for the next person they meet either. You have to be in a certain mindset to see someone as more.

Keep focusing on you. It’s great you’re taking care of your physical appearance. The knock backs will come regardless but do it for you, not to meet a mate. Your confidence will grow but it won’t be over night. Try to meet people through meet up sites where people get to know you first and looks are secondary. Delete men that give the bare minimum. It will leave your phone more bare and feel empty at first but lack of effort feels worse over time when you’re investing. Only invest in those that show genuine interest in you, how your day was etc.

TheGreatFadoodler · 2022-01-14T14:25:36+00:00

Ur worth quite a bit

Own_Shower_571 · 2022-01-14T14:32:26+00:00

He’s one person, no matter how attractive you are there will be people who think differently. You’ve got to have more confidence and self love

its_kiddos · 2022-01-14T19:31:53+00:00

Guys have preferences just like girls. White, Black, Asian, tall, Curvy, thin, etc. When you see a guy that's not your type, you don't have interest, right?

Same thing with men. You just wern't his type. Keep looking.

SnooMachines1406 · 2022-01-14T04:06:44+00:00

Dont see your value through other peoples eyes because they dont know you as well as you know you, that why you shouldnt take rejection serious.

PaleontologistNo2785 · 2022-01-14T06:36:14+00:00

I didnt realize following someone equals shooting your shot. Ive accidentally made some girls feel worthless then.

2022-01-14T07:14:55+00:00

Look in the mirror everyday (at least 30 seconds) and say something you like about yourself. It all starts at home. Also remember you’re not meant for everyone like not everyone is meant for you.

FaithInStrangers94 · 2022-01-14T11:08:41+00:00

I know how shit it can make you feel but you need to remind yourself that it doesn’t mean you’re worthless, it just means he wasn’t interested at that point in time given the situation and his personal pretences

For instance I’m mostly into slightly chubby / busty girls And I’ve turned down a fit gym girl before because I wasn’t physically interested - people have all sorts of preferences and just because they reject you definitely doesn’t mean you’re undesirable to the next person

Ashamed-Temporary244 · 2022-01-14T13:49:35+00:00

We’ve all been there brother keep ya chin up brodi

asd1234red · 2022-01-14T15:02:14+00:00

Man I'm a guy and I have the same exact problem.... Maybe everyone is feeling contempt towards you. Maybe your so attractive that people are afraid of you. I find consolation in the fact that it is better to be feared and respected than loved. They take u for granted when they get comfortable with you.... Anyone.

Keep working on yourself, do the things you love, be the way you like, become the best version of yourself. Every single minute, every single second. Don't filter your actions. Let the connection between your mind and your body be solid as a rock. Never doubt. It kills you, really!

When you block your actions by second guessing yourself you are not truly being yourself. Therefore you bring not much value to an interaction. But if you are yourself and are unhindered by what others think, you are going to really be you and others will want to be around you naturally. Sometimes less and sometimes more. But never do it for that. Do it so you find happiness within yourself. When you are like this you become truly happy and no one can ruin that. It is the truest form of expression, when you say, speak, move how you really want.

This is what frontmen in bands do... And you can observe the results of that haha For example study the strokes, the Arctic monkeys, nirvana, avril Lavigne. See how they captivate the audience with their words and actions because they express their emotions, not calculatedly but naturally and raw.

You are fucking amazing, whoever you are. The feminine form, the hair, the eyes, the vivaciousness, the attitude. No matter the gender, you can just observe and relish at the mere existence of beauty.... But people like these are a rare breed. But they do exist and what u give u will get, don't worry. Keep on keeping on. :)

I wish you good luck.

Zicronblade0 · 2022-01-14T15:19:35+00:00

Your sexual market value isn’t your true value homie. People conflate this all the time.

iplaysmitegame · 2022-01-14T16:42:07+00:00

That's not a rejection, wtf? You sent him a follow request and he did some social media tactic to retain followers. You didn't even "shoot your shot." Following someone on Instagram isn't flirting

ANewOriginalUsername · 2022-01-14T17:46:54+00:00

Honestly I relate this a lot an unfortunately I cannot give any real advice to help

I've also been working on myself a lot physically and mentally these past 3 years, I've worked out more, invested in better clothing and colognes as well as consistently read self help books not only to help with dating, but to also enjoy just being alone.

While all of this has helped Me feel more comfortable being myself, it hast changed my dating life all that much as the majority of my dates that I've received have been from online dating apps (all of which haven't ended well) and literally the first time I approached a (virtually) Complete stranger and asked her on a date, she flakes on me putting me back on square one.

So I guess I all I can say is the same I keep telling myself every day "just keep your head up and keep moving forward, expect nothing and accept everything"

2022-01-14T18:05:54+00:00

I hit on a girl yesterday irl and all she said was "not interested"

Just move on nothing matters there's other people who are more than happy to give you a shot

Numbw1ll · 2022-01-14T18:50:11+00:00

Welcome to a man's world. Get over it

Silent-Recipe-3600 · 2022-01-15T00:04:51+00:00

If you’re feeling of self worth comes from validation of someone else then you will never be happy or confident with yourself

bestinwpb · 2022-01-15T02:32:21+00:00

"I'd rather go 0-30 than 0-9" - Kobe Bryant

Kevinserj · 2022-01-15T02:53:52+00:00

It’s all good. I asked a girl out recently and got rejected as well. Shit happens :/. Just keep your head up and remember you are still human and are still loved no matter what ❤️

Professional-Head83 · 2022-01-15T06:47:58+00:00

I have seen guys who are considered the stereotypical "dork, geek or dweeb" hang out with the most beautiful and attractive women.

Also, I used to take high school classes with guys who were considered "jocks" but were the coolest and nicest guys, and the girls who were cheerleaders and were the nicest, sweetest girls i've ever met. In fact, i still see one of the girls around. Her sister is friends with my sister. I wasn't a student athlete or anything like that. I was very skinny and geeky, but I was so accepted. So don't worry about it. That guy is likely a douche.

vtorow · 2022-01-16T12:52:03+00:00

You need to remind yourself. You’re not worthless because someone literally SOMEONE unfollowed you. I bet you also do that. Humans are selfish. You determine your own worth and not some random person. Never forget this

rewinder909 · 2022-01-14T04:25:09+00:00

You have to start to love yourself first. If you're not loving yourself, how do you expect someone else to love you? Start by doing a journey towards the inward, meditation, read books about self improvement, find your passions, and once you've found yourself, you can start accepting other people into your life. The only person you've got untill the end of your life it's you, other external persons and things can come and go. I've learnt that the hard way. A good book i can recommend is the power of now.

PS: Get away from social media that shit is toxic. Meet people outside way better and easier.

letmereaddamnit · 2022-01-14T05:43:43+00:00

How I deal with rejection is by telling myself "wow you really dodged a bullet. She's not into you so she's clearly an idiot" I know it's not true but it makes me feel better.

The-chosen-one-369 · 2022-01-14T09:38:52+00:00

Never let someone have you for sexual desire. If you find a lil doubt before he dump you should dump him on first it might be awkward , but you will gain confidence that confidence will change your personality. If you think look matters then you misunderstood relationships , everything is evolving around your personality( and it's not always about looks )

BreakinLiberty · 2022-01-14T04:43:29+00:00

[permanently deleted]

MattPruga · 2022-01-14T10:43:23+00:00

what the actual fuck is this, you feel worthless because some dude unfollowed you on this internet thingy? Our generation is sick, we are all sick.

Grouchy-Banana2246 · 2022-01-14T12:53:01+00:00

This is the way boys, keep rejecting these thotties to lower their ego and break them 😂

KoozeMang · 2022-01-14T17:22:38+00:00

I feel like you missed the point of shooting your shot entirely...

NewBee_GME · 2022-01-15T00:55:15+00:00

Let me tell you this, I will send you my pic, women reject men, and if we keep counting, we will probably die in a day or two

Also men think with dick, when I say men,80 to 90 percent, doesn't mean you are unattractive

Never value your self worth based on others views

Title	I tried shooting my shot and It didn’t work - now I feel worthless.
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	44
Comments	57
Date	January 14, 2022 3:40 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/s3iae7/i_tried_shooting_my_shot_and_it_didnt_work_now_i/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-tried-shooting-my-shot-and-it-didnt-work-now-i.1269077 https://theredarchive.com/post/1269077

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