How do you guys just stop caring.

NextSpinach · 2019-08-02T07:02:52+00:00

Practice. The more women you talk to the better you get at it. You'd be surprised how much confidence you can carry away from even an interaction you don't escalate successfully.

You start off kind of nervous and shitty at talking to women, then you get better and can hold great, flirty conversations but are shitty at escalating, then you learn how to actually escalate properly. Its step by step.

Radicalness3 · 2019-08-02T07:35:34+00:00

It's OK to start small. Next time you're at a grocery store or coffee shop, make an effort to ask the cashier something. Even just "How's your day going?"

Then move on to talking to someone while you're out walking. "Hey, cute dog. What's its name?"

Interactions like these can be good practice at social interactions to build up to approaching that hot chick at the bar.

ImJustSo · 2019-08-02T12:04:27+00:00

Sounds to me like you just don't really want to do things their way. A lot of "not caring" is more so about focusing on caring about the right things. You don't have to be an idiot when you approach women, but if you desire the ability to approach women, then find your way of approaching them.

Here's a personal example. I don't like going direct with women. I don't start interactions by telling them they're cute or that I like something about them. I never give away a particular power that I hold. I don't understand why it works better for me to play the part I do, it's just more comfortable and does work better for me. I'm indirect and I tease a lot, I'm funny, a bit cocky, but still reserved. Women typically just respond to my masculine energy, so I know I don't need to set the tone by telling her I'm speaking to her because I think she's cute. Women don't need to know why I'm talking to them, all they need to do is talk to me.

Do you know how many ways there are to begin interactions with a woman? Like endless? They don't have to be sleazy, or awkward, or bawdy. It could be as simple as.....It's chilly, you're standing next to a girl and you say, "Brrrr!"

She is a woman. If you're cold, she was cold ten minutes ago. She's gonna say something like, "I know right!" I'd probably bring up my nipples, her nipples, or both our nipples, but moving onto the next example.

Maybe you overhear a girl talking about how she's out of smokes, but your buddy smokes. You ask him for a square, he gives you one, and you walk right up to the girl and say, "Need one of these? Let's go outside!" This actually happened. Hottest chick in the bar, saw her dress hiked up past her ass on the mechanical bull and decided I wanted to touch her butt. So we went outside, yay.

Let's see, any girl that brushes against you or stands "too close" typically wants to talk to you. Those girls only need a word to open, they are waiting for you to acknowledge them.

Girls that are looking you in the eyes repeatedly and smiling? Practically inviting you over and you're scared as fuck to take that invitation? I don't know what to tell you there. You know exactly what you're supposed to do and me saying it won't fix that. Those girls, you could just go sit or stand by and let them open you, or you could say some smooth shit, doesn't matter. They just want to talk to a hot guy and right then, that's what they think you are. You might not think so, but that's what the dopey smile means.

2019-08-02T07:23:39+00:00

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NewtypeJ · 2019-08-02T07:11:18+00:00

Alcohol never helps me personally. I refer to myself as a tired drunk so when I drink, my main focus is to go to a small corner and fall asleep. I look at it logically like most guys try to do with all things, there are more women than men in the world so the odds of finding someone is more for you than it is for them. There’s that, but you don’t want all women, you probably want a select few, when I first started I gave myself 3 seconds to approach them and talk to them and it worked with confidence but it didn’t help me to close. I think mystery referee to it as canned material, I don’t take it as far as he does but it seems like everyone does it (RSD and the other YouTube pickup artists). It just works. Try coming up with some natural sounding shit to say and just try it out. The next part that I find helps confidence is that most guys focus on closing from the moment they see a girl, they think “She’s hot I wanna fuck her”. Enjoy the pick up process, enjoy passing shit tests (my favorite part). Go out to have fun with friends not get laid. My easiest nightlife pickups have been when I’ve gone out with a group of like minded people, we we having a good time and girls approached our group or opened themselves up for conversation (cause you know, girls don’t approach and shit). I know this was long but you’re where I was years ago, it’ll get better just keep up the press brother.

killing_floor_noob · 2019-08-02T11:03:48+00:00

Fuck an expensive hooker. I know this might get me downvoted - but hear me out.

Once you have been with a super hot girl and had a good time (and you will have a good time with a top class escort) then you really don't care too much about talking to other hot girls. It's kinda a 'been there, done that' scenario.

If you've never been with a super hot woman, then when you are chatting to one at a bar then you will always be thinking 'what will it be like'.... rather than focusing on your game.

It worked for me.

Optymistyk · 2019-08-02T11:10:58+00:00

Dude, you have to realize it's OK to be sexual. Women like being hit on by confident, high value men. Even if sometimes they pretend they don't, and even if it doesn't work out in the end, they get a nice ego boost from it. They actually despise men who don't have the balls to be openly sexual. Just don't be a creep. Don't stress out and don't try to please her. Have the mindset of "yes, I like your body. Let's see if you can excite me".

AllFunLife-com · 2019-08-02T07:16:30+00:00

The more shots you take the more shots you make. Keep approaching, for me it became more about the fun of the game/process than judging the results of each individual shot.. here’s some new daygame in S Beach for inspiration https://youtu.be/CsJ8HP0OvrM sending you positive vibes bro!

WestCoastSaint · 2019-08-02T09:44:43+00:00

TLDR - get a wingman, use the 3 second rule and work on your inner game by reading books.

Most points have already been covered, I just want to reinforce the importance of the 3 second rule and the people you are with. If you're afraid of embarrassing yourself in front of your friends then they are not true friends. Find someone who is either in a similar situation to yours or is better at it. Approaching with a friend using openers like asking for a female opinion might not get you the best results but it's an easy start. The 3 second rule is paramount cause you are using the moment before limiting beliefs and insecurities kick in to smile and take the first step towards them. Once you already committed you stop thinking about what could go wrong and start thinking about how to make sure it goes well. If you prefer an analogy: I first understood the importance of this rule when I was at the beach trying to run into the freezing cold water. Sure you could go in slowly but that's pretty much torture. Instead I'd focus on getting into the right state of mind. This state of mind doesn't stick around for long cause you quickly start thinking about the thermal shock you're about to experience. But as soon as I got it and the raging waves gave me an opening I'd start running and it's the most liberating thing ever. Also, check out "the secrets of the A game" by Logan Edwards. I'm currently reading it and it's doing wonders for my inner game, confidence and perception of women.

Zandito · 2019-08-02T08:06:37+00:00

Practice and just knowing there will be others, if she’s not for you better to know sooner than later. If there isn’t a pretty immediate click, bye, Felicia.

ifthesewoescouldtalk · 2019-08-02T09:14:52+00:00

focus on just talking to people.get to know anyone, whether or not you wanna fuck them. couple that flow with alcohol and once you wanna step up to a girl you think is attractive, there will be no pressure. Just think of something interesting to say if you dont find the game intrinsically fun.

Paltenburg · 2019-08-02T10:03:42+00:00

A jumpstart for me would be something like a multi-day festival. There, I'm forced to socialize and I like to talk to women, so after doing that for a couple of days, you get the hang of it a bit, and it's easier to do it back home as well.

10Meyjachi · 2019-08-02T15:30:11+00:00

I have the same thing, but particularly approaching groups is hard. Maybe brake it into something you are comfortable with and just start small, like waitresses or something like that, teasing them.

Zilla0721 · 2019-08-02T22:11:44+00:00

Stop over analyzing and start living. Don't worry about other people's thought and opinions because at the end of the day they aren't thinking about you.

sinbad2011 · 2019-08-03T04:33:49+00:00

You admit you care and accept it. Laugh at it. Don't take it seriously

hilhil83 · 2019-08-03T06:00:06+00:00

as a female sometime you just feel hunted not like someone actually wants to connect with you for real. keep that in mind.

just my 2 cents.

mydeardroogs · 2019-08-02T07:10:22+00:00

Get new friends. Take a multivitamin. Go somewhere unfamiliar. Don't feel pressured to be sociable, just try it in bursts. You don't need to talk and have fun for a long while, just have a few good moment, lean into those good moments as motivators.

2019-08-02T08:11:53+00:00

How do you stop caring? That’s a weird question. If you stopped caring you wouldn’t be out looking for women in the first place. You’d probably be at home doing something else.

And if you want to have fun, do what is fun for you. I mean do you want me to tell you what I think will be fun for you without knowing you? You should know what you enjoy.

Title	How do you guys just stop caring.
Author	EricH4753
Upvotes	22
Comments	30
Date	August 2, 2019 6:31 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/cl0fm5/how_do_you_guys_just_stop_caring/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-you-guys-just-stop-caring.1475140 https://theredarchive.com/post/1475140

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