Recently got out of a long term relationship, moved to a new city and started going on a ton of first dates. Out of 11 first dates in the past four months, 10 have ended with a makeout and 8 (either on the first or later dates) ended with sex.

A lot of this sub is about getting the number. That's step 1 of many toward getting into a relationship or FWB or a kiss or sex or pretty much anything the two of you could possibly want. The date is the lynchpin/keystone/critical path for everything else. It's the basics, but it's stuff that we blow because we're nervous and in our heads too much.

So--from my experience--the most important things about building attraction on date #1, arguably the point in the process most important in determining the path of your eventual relationship.

  • Plan it perfectly. Ideally end near her place so you can walk her home, or near your place so you can invite her up for a drink at the end of the night. Pick somewhere casual but classy. A microbrewery works, or a cool cocktail joint.
  • Make it a drink, preferably (maybe exclusively) alcoholic. Please for the love of god don't do food on date 1. Anything that robs the date of eye contact or talking should be nixed immediately. Do it on a Tuesday or something. Fridays are for meeting up with her late night after you've both been out and she's been thinking about you all week
  • Hug her when you see her. Set the stage for physical intimacy since I know you actually want to touch her. Easy move: high five her every time you agree with something she says or even when she goes to the bathroom. Put your hand on the small of her back when you're walking next to her. Put your hand on her shoulder when she makes you laugh.
  • Sit next to her. Booth > bar > table. Whatever privacy you lose at the bar, you more than make up for in terms of physical proximity and intimacy. Do not sit across from her. How are you going to hold each other's hand or play with each other's hair or massage each other or play fucking patty cake or do anything fun and intimate if you're sitting miles away?
  • Compliment her. You already got the date. It's not time to play it cool anymore. How about, "Jesus Christ that's a hot dress." Be sexual. "Holy shit you look hot." After rubbing her neck, "You are unbelievably tight." Think about what you want to hear on the first date. She wants to hear similar things.
  • Go for the kiss before she expects it. Don't wait until you're hailing a cab for her to try to sneak in a last-second peck. On my last date I went for it an hour in after the girl told me she liked Ender's Game. She said, "I can't kiss you for that," but when we left the bar and I went for it again it was a full-on makeout. She wants to know you want to fuck her (just like you'd like to know she wants to fuck you). And don't get too greedy, pull back every once in a while. She'll probably have her eyes closed still smooching the air between you.

Good conversation and physical attraction are table stakes, but you will win on all the little things that make the date feel sexy and exciting. Good luck out there.