So last night I went out to a bar by myself. Usually when I drink I become pretty extroverted and start talking to different groups of girls or girls 1:1. Last night was no different though it was my first time going out solo.

I find that my energy shifts when I start to drink from usually a pretty reserved dude to a high energy almost a troll/trying to be funny mode. Where I’ll start making things up like “I’m trying to become a swiftie” as the Taylor Swift concert was happening the same week. And girls would get a kick out of it and start giving me the run down.

This general mode is really good for the first 2mins of the convo because it gets them smiling, laughing and engaged. But I find the longer I do I start digging myself into this made up story/ character. Where girls will start calling out my bs (usually in a friendly/laughing way).

I feel like though my vibe can come off more as an enthusiastic, but not to be taken serious guy when I get in that mode. Though there’s levels too it.

Near the end of the night I started talking to this one girl who was younger. We were hitting it off talking the shit, making her laugh & stuff.

She hinted at me buying her a drink so I did so. I don’t usually buy girls drinks but we were talking for probably 10-15mins at this point and had gotten her Instagram. During & after the drink we were holding hands and relatively touchy so I thought go in for the kiss - which she rejected by saying “not yet” or something like that.

I kinda just rubbed it off as we were still pretty touchy and talking and dancing a bit but I could sense the convo starting to die out because it’s loud and hard to maintain a convo for so long but I wouldn’t say it was awkward either.

A few minutes later she said her brother was looking for her but she’d be back. I waited and eventually walked around to go find her. I saw her sitting near the front on her phone likely trying to avoid me.

Before I was about to head out I saw her against the wall on her phone somewhat near where we were standing before and I made snarky remark as I was a bit upset that she lied and I felt like I was some bad guy or something. Cause I’ve never had a girl smoothly escalate just for me to feel like I’m some bad guy she’s trying to avoid for no apparent reason after hitting it off.

I’m not sure if I did something or she was just more shy. Or if she was using me for a drink - though I did get her Instagram and she never unfollowed me.

Thoughts both on the vibe and how to be less trolly & more charming + girl situation is appreciated.