Getting numbers is the easy part.

ThePUA_Baddie · 2014-03-18T14:15:15+00:00

It's not a text game problem. It's a game problem. You didn't build enough attraction before getting the number.

joshsway · 2014-03-18T15:15:10+00:00

Yes, numbers are easy, but also they don't mean much. Focus on ATTRACTION, not number closing. Here is my advice on how to get women not to flake as much: https://www.joshsway.com/articles/view/how-to-prevent-her-from-flaking, note, especially, POINT #1.

TheSicilianDude · 2014-03-18T15:57:17+00:00

Protip: Get the number at a high point in the conversation, when you KNOW she is enjoying being with you. If you asking for the number feels forced, like if it's during an awkward silence, the chances of a date in the future are lower. Building up attraction before is critical!

TomatoKarate · 2014-03-18T18:55:16+00:00

Read this, it is incredible. http://www.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1vpxcb/how_i_ask_girls_out/

Apex_of_Attraction · 2014-03-18T19:07:57+00:00

There is no such thing as a text game problem. If you meet her out the night before you should really only be getting the number as a last resort if logistics aren't good to pull. Text "game" should really just be to organize a time to see them again.

If they're flaking after she gives you her number, there could be 2 reasons: 1 is that she wasn't really interested to begin with and gave you the number to get rid of you. 2 is that you didn't create enough of a connection with her on the night. Even if she is attracted to you on the night, you are still not much more than a fun experience for her. Create connection.

MISSION 1: Do not allow yourself to get ANY numbers for a month to focus on pulling instead of trying to get the date.

MISSION 2: After this, only ask for one number a night. The spray and pray method is less effective. When you ask for her number, tell her specifically why you want it, and even organize a time to meet. Get her to EXPLICITLY agree to it.

MISSION 3: Create opportunities for her to invest. Leave silences in the interaction, and use a commanding tonality with your voice to get her to start gaming you. Give her an opportunity to chase.

Most importantly, there is no such thing as "text game". Texting is just to organize the date. Other than that just fluff where necessary but remember its main purpose.

Darragh, Apex of Attraction http://apexofattraction.weebly.com/

DaveYarnell · 2014-03-18T21:04:46+00:00

Basically you have to spend enough time and make enough of an impression on a girl so that when the next weekend comes around she will still remember you and want you. The texts are just little reminders of you, they don't build anything new.

I used to be like you. I used to try to get as many numbers a night as possible. Now, what I have to do is feel out a girl to see if she is actually available, and if I am attracted to her I will actually focus just on her for at least an hour or so and make sure she isn't too drunk to remember.

Then after that hour or more is up and you can tell she is like your buddy for the night you can go do whatever you're doing, take a break for a bit, and then go chat with someone else. You'll have to still acknowledge the first girl though, say hello to her etc have quick chats maybe a dance, unless you leave the venue entirely.

SmilesLookGreatOnYou · 2014-03-18T19:07:45+00:00

You describe me to a Tee. My friends tell me I can get any girl. And call me the ladies man.

Approaching is no issue. Never has been. But I quickly lose interest. And typically don't even text/call back if I ever even do ask for their number. I'll even have girls coming up to me. I have a very inviting aura, I've been told.

It should also be noted, I just go out of a semi serious relationship. So I'm not really looking tbh. Still in recovery mode. But it's nice to know I can 'get some' if the need arises.

BaconWaken · 2014-03-19T20:35:56+00:00

What do you want to do; get a girls number or stick your dick in her? Stay clear in your intent and your situation will manifest itself.

YetzirahToAhssiah · 2014-03-21T16:20:01+00:00

So its definitely a text game problem. I know it is tough to build rapport over text, so I have stopped trying to do so. I have been trying to keep things short and concise by going quickly to setting up a date. But I either don't get that far, or have a ton of flakes.

This is what Seddit would have you believe, but all my successful dates have some comfort building during texting. It's not complicated... you just talk and flirt a bit. I think this advice about never texting just to text caused me to fail a few times. A few girls I've been on dates with clearly needed to get to know me more via text before going on a date, and said so while texting. The girl I have in mind I talked to for all of 2 minutes before she left the bar... you can see how more comfort-building would be necessary.

I think more important than texting, however, is the interaction you have in person. How much time do you spend in set when you get a number? How much do you kino?

In a post in the sidebar, a guy always escalates up to, but not including, the kiss. He does a lot of other things, including making a teasing joke he can refer back to in the text, but he claims a 90% number/date ratio.

So here are some things you might work on:

1) Get to know her, find out the "why" behind her biographical data.

2) Escalate kino until you know where you stand with her (probably brushing her hair/neck while looking into her eyes, standing close to her)

3) Depending on your personal style of game, you might try making progressive statements of intent throughout the interaction. For example, "You're cute," followed by "Do you know venue X? We should go there sometime" followed by something more obvious in intent. These should not be back-to-back, but peppered throughout the conversation. Often, you'll want to redirect the conversation back to whatever you were talking about before without waiting for her reaction.

4) On that last point, talking about a venue you should go to (based on your mutual interests) is very powerful. I like to do this in the middle of the interaction, and then date-close at the end of the interaction. This will bypass all the logistics bullshit that takes hours while texting, and only take a few minutes. Find out her schedule, find out when she's free, and "Cool, you and I are going on a date at venue X on Tuesday at 6:30. Then we'll go get ice cream/dinner, and then go bowling." (3 part dates are awesome, btw). She'll be much less likely to flake if she sets up a date with you in person.

5) After you number-close... Hug and Kiss on the cheek. This demonstrates confidence, and will very clearly separate you from the betas.

Master these 5 points, and I really think you'll start having a lot more dates.

MX72 · 2014-03-18T15:19:54+00:00

Hey man I can relate.. I think the problem is you need to take them home and fvck them. Honestly. She ends the night thinking "nice guy, wish he would have fvcked me" or maybe she went home with someone else in which case she prob dosent even remember you. Thats what she is looking for so give it to her. You wont have to text her, she will text you.

onmyradar · 2014-03-18T15:23:53+00:00

Texting after getting a number is purely for logistical reasons - a way to make future plans, not for trying to further build attraction because it rarely works. It's comfortable to say things over a text that you might not in person and that is debilitating. Why? Simple, because it's impersonal and easy to form miscommunication (i.e when things are misinterpreted). Texting should not be used as a crutch.

Try making your intentions more clear. Take the things you say over text and convert them to things you would say in person - remove that filter. If you think she's cute or is wearing a lovely dress, voice it (just don't flood her with compliments, usually one should suffice).

Remain eye contact when you speak, keep a slight smile for added dreaminess. Put your hand on her arm/hand/back, pull her in closer at the same time. Pay attention to the little things then isolate. She'll eat it up. I think you can figure out what to do from here.

sandwich_monkey · 2014-03-18T17:00:09+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	Getting numbers is the easy part.
Author	tronicdata
Upvotes	37
Comments	21
Date	March 18, 2014 1:39 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/20pt7f/getting_numbers_is_the_easy_part/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/getting-numbers-is-the-easy-part.1367737 https://theredarchive.com/post/1367737

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