I don't know what to do anymore

FairAnalyst · 2019-10-24T22:50:10+00:00

You’re probably fucking up something extremely fundamental. I see it all the time, with guys with zero success. Even with good looking dudes. Sometimes it’s just body posture, eye contact, or the way they smile. It’s seriously stuff like that that’s fucking them up usually. Barring that it can be up to stuff like they’re just boring people.

You need to meet up with another guy to give you honest critique.

getyourlifeplease · 2019-10-25T08:46:10+00:00

Im a girl, and Ill tell you EXACTLY why guys who claim to have all their "ducks in line" still fail with us - DESPERATION.

It is a cycle: guy wants to ask girl out...guy reads books and watches videos about approach...guy goes to girl and just randomly asks her out (doesnt build rapport, doesnt try to have a casual convo, doesnt get to know her a bit first)...girl rejects him...guy lets his desire to have a gf rule his thoughts so he keeps following the same pattern that hasnt been successful - and after each rejection he gets more and more desperate to fulfull that desire. And over...and over...and over again. (This cycle can go unnoticed by a guy who may not be self aware - possibly have mental health issues, or be developmentally/intellectually challenged).

My advice: we can smell a desperate guy a mile away. We SEE IT. The way a guy approaches us and the vibe he puts out (either confident or socially inept). His body language (needy guys tend to have very weak and passive body language). How he talks to us and the things he says (when a guy is awkward there is inevitably long awkward silences, or if he tries to hard and say something awfully inappropriate or flat out weird)...and yes, we can see through a bad pickup line pretty quickly, and a lot of times all of that mixed together gives off a creepy vibe. So...just take it easy. Dont let anxiety get the best of you. We are PEOPLE just like you, and the worse your approach- the less your chances of success are, because a desperate and creepy vibe signals (to us) a guy who has the potential to be clingy as Hell, and most girls wont part their legs for a guy who is creepy, clingy, or desperate.

All of that to say, it is great you are asking for help. THAT shows that you truly want to change your success rate...and I respect that! A lot of guys in this sub give great advice - listen to it. Take a break from this hunt for attention, recalibrate your seduction skills, then try again

serpx · 2019-10-24T21:44:46+00:00

When you date women, are you thinking more about yourself and overanalyzing, or are you more concentrated on them with making sure they feel connected and are having a good time?

-babybea · 2019-10-25T02:38:01+00:00

There might not be an issue. This might be not the thing you wanted to read you want solid advice and an answer but it might just be that those particular women weren't interested.

Other than that it could be that if you tend to ask women put a lot they might just see that there is nothing special about her. You're craving for affection not craving for her. You're just asking out who's pretty and might say yes. I've been asked out by guys who do this a lot and it's kind of an awful feeling you know you're just a placeholder and they don't actually care about getting to know you.

That's definitely all a maybe but everything else sounds like you're doing a lot right.

If you wanted to you could take a break from all this. Come back in a month and ask someone on a date that matters to you. Also show a bit of vulnerability and let them open up to you too. You could even mention that you find dating difficult so you're glad she said yes or something.

If you're just looking for a hook-up though try tinder x

CollapseSoMainstream · 2019-10-24T22:21:11+00:00

Got a wingman? I'm looking for one now after my mate said I'm way too beta, more or less... don't seem confident. At the time I thought I was acting super confident.

Could be something you're doing but just don't realise.

manonpoint_com · 2019-10-24T22:41:23+00:00

Where is your sticking point. Are you getting first dates or not even that far? That will help diagnose the issue.

WannabePUAEastBay · 2019-10-25T00:06:14+00:00

There are a few things that could be going on here. It is impossible for anyone to say without knowing more about you and how you approach women. It sounds like you are on the right track in terms of self development. Keep this up! A few things I would want to know is (1) are you kino-ing effectively and (2) are you able to detect IOIs? One thing you may be doing that I still do all the time is writing off IOIs when girls give them to you. Also, don't drive yourself crazy chasing after girls. There is more to life than chasing girls and there's something to be said about letting them chase after you!

boodie_1961 · 2019-10-25T07:30:23+00:00

Learn to read body language. Girls (women) give red/green light signals all the time. Plenty of videos on YouTube.

stevenmarkryan · 2019-10-25T13:36:48+00:00

I ask girls out regularly, often in a casual way,

What does this mean?

Title	I don't know what to do anymore
Author	Omega_322
Upvotes	35
Comments	39
Date	October 24, 2019 9:39 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/dmna91/i_dont_know_what_to_do_anymore/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-dont-know-what-to-do-anymore.1482063 https://theredarchive.com/post/1482063

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