I've got a girlfriend. A beautiful gal. She's really great. We had been off and on for a little while with no visible hope of becoming a real long-term thing. When we were off, I told myself that I had "one-itis". When we were on, I told myself that it wasn't going to last because I deserved better.

Guess what guys? The perfect girl is never going to come along. Not fairytale, absolutely-flawless-perfect, anyway. "She'd be perfect if she was X" shouldn't ever come into play. Yes, yes, yes, try to push yourself into new boundaries and find new challenges & more beautiful women to make your life great. Yes, try to improve yourself in social interactions, and yes, try to find a girl that makes you happy. Who cares about anyone else's picture of your #1 girl?

But once you find a girl that makes you truly, deeply, happy, and she wants a monogamous relationship? Game her. You can keep your aloofness, keep your alpha male status, keep your outcome independence. Hell, keep your openers & negs for that matter. These are just social skills that have been given a name. Everyone who is on /r/seduction - or any other forum to do with seduction, for that matter - is just learning social skills. You are trying to take your social skills to the next level. Keep these social skills for everyone in your life. But don't look for K-closes or F-closes any more. Keep the #-closes. These people are now your friends.

Funny thing I realized about social skills about a month ago - you don't learn them by reading about them. Once you've read enough, you've read enough. If you want to climb further up the ladder, you climb outside Seddit, outside Reddit, outside the internet, outside books. The only people that can teach you how to be true masters of seduction are those who have mastered it without overthinking it - people like Johnny Depp, Brad Pitt, etc etc. Fuck, even Adrien Brody. That dude is not naturally blessed in the looks department, but he has that perfect movie-star demeanour. Don't overthink anything.

Don't look to be like those guys, look to develop your own demeanour. If you're a computer programmer, you want to be that sexy elusive thoughtful genius that doesn't talk too much, but always has something good to say. If you're a musician, develop your rockstar attitude. If you play sports... You're probably not here. Something about people who play sports just gets them laid. Don't say "oh that's cause they play sports".. fuck no. Sports taught them what they know about seduction. If you're someone who plays sports and is bad at picking up women, don't lose hope. It'll probably even be easier for you to learn what you're missing. Programming doesn't teach you shit about women. The point of any seduction forum is to help you find your own unique brand of self-confidence. If you're a programmer now, figure out what you need to learn to fill the gaps that a lack of sports created. This is just an example; this doesn't mean you have to stop being a programmer -

This means you have to look at all the things that are wrong with you, all your insecurities, and confront them. Actively seek them out. Ask yourself what you're worried about, what you're self-conscious about. And why. And then find out why someone who isn't worried about those things doesn't worry. Steal their attitude and use it as you please.

I used to be self-conscious about money (I grew up poor), but now I've realized that rather than being jealous of rich people, I've got to just learn how to make money from them.. Then I won't be poor any more. Same as the alphas. If I see a dude who gets girls, he's not an enemy. Fuck. He's a great guy to have around. Make friends with him, and you'll get more girls. You guys are gonna call it "raising your social value", but nah. If a dude gets laid a lot, he's gonna teach you how to get laid just from letting you watch how he works. None of this is an act. Find out who you are, and project it. He's not acting.

[side note: don't ask him deep "pickup" questions about how he does it. That's weird, unless you know he's already involved in the community. Approach him like a normal dude. "Man, how are you so good with women?" If he knows how to explain it, he will. If he doesn't, just keep watching. Don't keep bugging him and nerding out about it. If he knows how to do it but can't explain it, it's always been easy to him. You've gotta learn to act like it's always been easy, so absorb that from him. But don't try to be him; apply it to your personality. This is too complicated to explain. Just go out and do it.]

So if you're worried about one-itis (by monogamous relationship) or settling for too little in a girl, don't try to keep pushing pickup. If you're happy with the woman you're with, and she wants you to be monogamous, make her happy. If you get out of a happy relationship for no reason other than the perceived "one-itis", you'll just spend the next while looking for the girl that she was. Don't say this is a lack of abundance - I know that I could go out on the subway and talk to ten girls and have a few numbers, maybe take one to bed. It's not about whether or not I can do something else - I know I can - it's about knowing what makes you happy and sticking with it. On the flipside, if you're unhappy that you don't have a girl, you have one-itis. Realize that once you're in a happy relationship (for both parties), one-itis doesn't exist.

Most people in the community forget this. They miss the game, because they miss the self-improvement. Keep the self-improvement, but ditch K-closing and F-closing anyone but your own girl. Ditch the community when you feel you've outgrown it. Those who have outgrown the community don't stick around to teach the people who don't get it. They're too busy going out getting laid. You can't learn anything from a community full of speculating amateurs. All the guys who really know what they're doing don't have time for a place like this.

tl;dr: This is too complicated to explain. Just go out and do it. Learn by watching the guys who are good, and the guys who are bad. Figure out the good things the good guys are doing, the bad things the bad guys are doing, and testing what works for you.

EDIT: Just realized I posted this on a Saturday night, when most of you guys are out chasing tail. Oh, the irony.