Saw this on Barstoolsports, thought it was funny.

According to glamour girl turned dating expert Kezia Noble, she can teach any man how to trick a woman into bed. What’s more, she doesn’t see anything unsisterly in sharing her seduction technique. Nor does she feel she’s ‘rinsing’ men by taking £4,000 a week for her ‘wisdom’ (her courses have made her a millionaire). Instead, says Kezia, she is helping women find love and happiness by making hapless men ‘dateable’ and says she can turn any oafish slob into Prince Charming. KEZIA’S KOMMANDMENTS: FIVE WAYS TO REVOLUTIONISE YOUR LOVE LIFE

Overhaul your look: ‘We look on them as a potential date might, so things like scruffy clothes, and dated hair styles need to be ironed out, and sloppy posture,’ says Kezia.

Cast your net wider: ‘Men who come on my courses they are limited to bars and clubs,’ reveals Kezia. ‘But they can meet potential dates in parks, museums, coffee shops, anywhere where they can engage in conversation’

Ask open questions and be yourself: Kezia explains: ‘It’s about being honest and refreshing and standing out from the other guys who go on about the same dull things.’

Take tips from the bad boys: ‘A bad boy is never too available, or predictable, and will put other people or his work before the girl in the early stages,’ says Kezia. ‘This shows he values himself and his own life and that he has a lot to give.’

Use the ‘upside down triangle’ to see whether she likes you: ‘The gaze should move naturally between each eye and the mouth,’ says Kezia. ‘If the girl looks away or shifts uncomfortably, it’s a no, but if they are relaxed with this or mirror this behaviour, there’s attraction.’

Let me save you the time and money. Here are Kezia's tips:

  1. Improve Yourself First That means working out and looking good. Look good, feel good.

  2. Talk to Everyone Don't just talk to the pretty girls in the club. Talk to EVERYONE everywhere you go. Fun guys who have lots of friends don't sit in the corner alone, they are out there making friends.

  3. Give value to others Nobody likes someone who can only talk about themselves. Be genuinely interested in other people and finding out about them.

  4. DGAF Don't give a fuck/have an abundance mentality. No girl wants a pushover.

  5. Solid eye-contact She talks about the triangle gaze here, but that's really for a k-close. The real tip is to have strong eye contact. If you're in the comfort zone and initiate the triangle gaze, chances are its on.

Boom, saved you six grand and a weekend. Now get out there and play.

Original article and pics of the hot "dating coach"