Why is it so easy for others, but so difficult for me?

HellhoundsOnMyTrail · 2015-12-18T14:42:35+00:00

You're looking at people who are at different stages on the path. Once they were at your stage thinking the same thing. And it oscillates, sometimes it'll be easier than others. Accept and open yourself to whatever the path brings. Then keep walking.

TacticalElmo · 2015-12-18T14:54:31+00:00

Maybe try being a bit more exciting/intriguing, add a little mystery to yourself, maybe in these 1 on 1's with the girls you're not showing off what you're truly capable of and they're un-attracted to you because of that, OR maybe you're showing it all off at once and maybe they feel you have nothing else left to offer.

lozboss · 2015-12-18T14:45:37+00:00

Ok I'm going to suggest a book- I rarely use a Book but you need it. Don't take that badly OP.

Mark Manson - Models.

It's a great book and teaches you everything you need to know. Read it- cover to cover.

It's not PUA nonsense, it's real life and will also teach you how to escalate properly with women.

Ravnurin · 2015-12-18T18:26:42+00:00

Hey brother! I used to have that EXACT same scenario as you just last year. I had been into pick up for about 3-4 years, but even then girls just would not get interested in me at all...and it was frustrating me so f*cking much. But then I found out what it was...

I wasn't touching/escalating nearly as much as I should have! Lack of touching will get you friend zoned every single day of the week.

I took an online course and learnt about the importance of touching, and as soon as I started applying more of that...wow. It was like night and fucking day.

Think about most dates you have been on, did you do little or a lot of touching?

If you're interested, I wrote a blog post about that topic that might help out.

OrangePeel_ · 2015-12-18T17:07:27+00:00

My success rate goes way up with girls when I'm assertive in want I want. It sounds like you are going on dates and getting a little too passive (relying on convo, hesitating in your actions). Obviously there is a fine line between confident and overly aggressive but I would suggest that you focus hard on kino when you are out and don't be afraid to make a move.

cyrutvirus · 2015-12-18T19:47:01+00:00

I highly recommend you read Coach Corey Wayne's book on How To Be A 3% Man. Because what you fear, you attract - and what you look in the face and confront it goes away. The simple statements from your text post such as "but when I hang out with them 1 on 1 I ruin it". This tells us a lot about your mindset and the vibe you give off around the girl because before you even go on a date with a girl you have the mindset "I will somehow manage to ruin it" - and you end up ruining it because what you gear you attract.

CrushHazard · 2015-12-19T06:58:40+00:00

Are these girls you just met or girls you already know?

Squand · 2015-12-19T15:25:48+00:00

First off, practice.

2nd maybe sex shouldn't be your goal. If your goal is go out and have a good time, enjoy company, sexual escapades happen more organically. If you are thinking, boy I want ti get laid, that's the subtext you're pushing out to the world.

Also, though I normally don't recommend this, under the circumstances you describe I think you should ask what's up. If this has happened a half dozen times, there is likely insight that these girls have to give you.

pinzon · 2015-12-21T06:37:47+00:00

Are you being a good listener? Are you showing genuine interest in them and encouraging them to share more? People's favorite thing to talk about is themselves, and people like people who like them.

You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people to be interested in you.

I must admit I'm on a bit of a high from reading this book, but How to Win Friends and Influence People is a great read. It's not pick up specific but it opened my mind as to what motivates people.

Add kino (which shows you're interested in other ways too) and you'll be on the right path.

letsgetrandy · 2015-12-18T18:54:52+00:00

Bro, what you need is a prostitute.

Spend the money and get this angst out of your system. Then immediately afterward, you will approach women with a completely different attitude.

The "I got laid yesterday" guy always gets laid again today.

LvL99Wailord · 2015-12-19T05:00:10+00:00

One word brother. Kino.

Title	Why is it so easy for others, but so difficult for me?
Author	Helpmeplslol
Upvotes	26
Comments	43
Date	December 18, 2015 2:32 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/3xcjgv/why_is_it_so_easy_for_others_but_so_difficult_for/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/why-is-it-so-easy-for-others-but-so-difficult-for.1306054 https://theredarchive.com/post/1306054

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