Did I rape her?

catfishmeow · 2012-08-29T13:48:32+00:00

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dharmaticate · 2012-08-29T13:54:40+00:00

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throwaway77779201929 · 2012-08-29T14:46:43+00:00

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Zeroknight92 · 2012-08-29T14:01:38+00:00

If you were drunk as well, you can always call rape on her. Technically, you both raped each other. (Technically)

CaptSnap · 2012-08-29T15:32:29+00:00

At a university there will be two concurrent investigations; a criminal and a university tribunal. Unless youre leaving out the rape details the police would find that there was no rape or there is insufficient evidence to suggest rape to proceed; the case would be dropped.

The university tribunal would see it differently. If she decides tomorrow, next week, or even in several years time that she was raped then they will be required to launch an independent investigation. During the investigation you would be prohibited from sharing any space with her. If your dorm is in the same building/complex as her dorm then youre ass is on the street. If you eat at the same dining hall as her, then you're hungry. If you share the same class, then youre going to miss; etc. What this effectively means is any time a student (really just a girl) accuses someone of sexual impropriety the university is legally compelled to kick your ass to the curb until it can gather enough evidence to either placate your accuser OR cover its ass in case she is not placated. You should seriously consider this at all times when your affiliation with the university can be determined.

At this point the tribunal will usually decide the information warrants a hearing. At the hearing a panel of indoctrinated panel of hard-line feminists (no shit, they will probably be the professors from the dept of women's studies...or they will be other stooges that have been required to read pamphlets written by that dept) are going to listen to her tell her story. Now these pamphlets are going to spell out how important it is to listen to the victim. How brave she is for coming forward, how hard it is for her to be there, and how much they should bend over backward to help her face her worst nightmare and put that monster of a human being away. Sure youll get to speak but you cant ask her any questions and your lawyer cant say anything and you will face a preponderance of evidence standard. Everything at the the hearing is contingent upon consent. At this point you will realize that everything you know about innocent until proven guilty is a sham, you will effectively be required to PROVE your innocence in that you have to prove you had consent. She can also appeal their decision and make it seem like the university is easy on rapists until they cave.

The panel will be listening for these things when deciding who is a rapist:

who has a penis
was she intoxicated (unable to consent...they also seem to not give a shit if the guy is drunk)
does she feel like a victim (then she is a victim)

They will then consult the university's definition for consent. Your university may be one of the dozens that uses a legal resource center which will coach the university on how to cover its ass (and throw your ass under the bus) in these situations. The resource center sends out material to all the universities that subscribe to it, this definition:

Consent is a voluntary, sober, imaginative, enthusiastic, creative, wanted, informed, mutual, honest, and verbal agreement.

(you can actually google that EXACT definition and find it repeated VERBATIM)

At this point they will cackle with glee because there is no way in flying donkey fuck you (or anyone else) could ever have gotten or PROVE that they had gotten that definition of consent.

OR in your specific case they will find that she was intoxicated and therefore its impossible for her to consent.

They will find you guilty of rape and expel you. Your name and picture will likely be featured in the campus newspaper and your academic career could well and truely be finished.

If youre following along you will probably reach about the same conclusion I have: all heterosexual sex is tantamount to rape at a university. Any time you have sex with a girl you give her the power for the rest of the time you are there to suddenly and dramatically end your career and have you expelled in shame. This is because there is enormous political pressure to end the "campus rape epidemic" and the university doesnt want to sit on the bad publicity side of the line on its dealings with rapists. They dont give a fuck how many boys they have to expel in order to placate the federal dept of education because nothing, NOTHING, is going to jeopardize that sweet sweet federal money. And thats really what it boils down to, the feminists want boys out of higher education.

tldr; not criminal but the university would expel you if she wanted them to

Hach8 · 2012-08-29T18:25:17+00:00

Legally speaking, no, you had consent assuming your story is true.

That doesn't mean you could not be indicted / convicted, or punished by your school.

rottingchrist · 2012-08-29T15:04:45+00:00

drunk

Not responsible for whatever she does.

"let's not have sex right now"

Withdrawal of consent.

"forget what I said, just fucking put it in"

Consent has been withdrawn. That is the vodka talking.

Congratulations son! You've finally fulfilled the purpose every man is born for. Rape.

/s (if it isn't obvious enough).

throwaway77779201929 · 2012-08-29T18:01:29+00:00

I want to point out that every girl is not a crazy feminist either. They don't all want to accuse men of rape.

You are worrying too much kid, are you a freshman?

pewdro · 2012-08-29T16:06:02+00:00

What? :S

That is not f rape!

Laws in USA are f crazy :S

typhonblue · 2012-08-29T16:01:15+00:00

Did you give your permission?

Technically you were raped, son.

5ft11flip · 2012-08-29T15:19:42+00:00

I would also ask 2x for their opinion because I believe in seeing on both sides. As I see it, you did not force her to engage in intercourse.

Next time, don't have drunk sex. This is where false rape accusations can happen and no one wants to go through that.

DerpaNerb · 2012-08-29T18:01:20+00:00

Do I (or probably anyone else here) think it's rape? No. She consented and you consented, that's all that should really matter.

Now, here's where people will tell you otherwise. She was drunk, so she is not capable of giving consent. It doesn't matter that you were also drunk, you are a man and are apparently superior to women in having responsibility while you are impaired (by your own doing). You are also supposed to be a perfect judge of impairment as well (while being drunk), and as such you are a misogynistic asshole for not knowing her BAC when she gave consent. Now since this is a women who is clearly incapable of thought, she obviously can't put enough thought into actually changing her mind... (which you should have known btw), so by not telling her that she is far too stupid to actually be changing her mind (by considering the pros and cons of the situation) and forcing her to stick to her initial answer of "let's not have sex right now"... you are also a rapist.

But not sarcastically... if she decided to regret it, and claimed rape... you would be fucked. Hopefully she's not a crazy bitch who feels like ruining your life. Even if the court isn't sexist and actually feels like following due process and the whole "innocent until proven guilty thing", you'll probably still be expelled from school whether the court finds you innocent or not.

2012-08-29T19:55:50+00:00

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rightsbot · 2012-08-29T13:30:17+00:00

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throwaway77779201929 · 2012-08-29T17:19:04+00:00

According to the current laws you are a rapist. Welcome to the club.

PeterArching · 2012-08-29T18:05:22+00:00

No. When everything is rape, nothing is rape.

alphabetpal · 2012-08-29T18:49:55+00:00

You'll find out when the police arrest you. If they don't, you didnt. It's entirely up to her. Btw, you wasted a lot of typing giving us the facts. In rape accusations the facts really don't matter much.

Ripslash · 2012-08-29T14:10:56+00:00

Did she feel pressured in any way? Did she think you might not like her unless she had sex with you?

If so, then you're an evil rapist just like every other man. /s

ballsdeepdemoinc · 2012-08-29T14:17:41+00:00

You should have a lawyer on retainer to call up whenever you are in that position. Maybe have a scenario like Lawyers and Date

mayonesa · 2012-08-29T20:10:25+00:00

she literally said, "forget what I said, just fucking put it in"

Not rape.

2012-08-29T20:28:26+00:00

If consent can be withdrawn after being given, then it can be re-given after being withdrawn. Easy 'nuff.

Legolihkan · 2012-08-30T00:23:33+00:00

In the eyes of the law (depending on the jury) you are theoretically guilty if she decides to say it was. However, rape accusations are not the typical result of sexual interactions and if i were you i wouldn't worry about it, despite that most people here will jump at the chance to ironically mock these absurd laws.

Estephe · 2012-08-30T01:49:05+00:00

This is, in the post-Constitution era, a serious crime in many states: a) since the female had some alcohol (and therefore DID NOT have the ability to consent, under current feminist jurisprudence); b) would become a crime in some states if later, even years later, she got mad at you and wanted you to suffer (called "regret rape"), c) and could treated as a crime since you cannot prove that the conversation you quote occurred as you described it (the female is not required to offer as much proof as a male is requited to provide).

OtherMikeP · 2012-08-30T01:53:10+00:00

I don't think so, drunk or not I would believe "Just fucking put it in" would imply consent.

HyperComa · 2012-08-30T02:17:34+00:00

If her story matches yours, then I would say that you didn't do anything rapey. However, depending on where you live, you may have committed adultery and/or sodomy. In the state of Virginia (where I live), any sex between unmarried persons is adultery, even if neither are married to other people. Also, in some areas/counties, any position other than missionary with vaginal penetration is sodomy, including oral. Luckily, these antiquated laws are rarely, if ever, prosecuted. I hope...

trees_at_school · 2012-08-29T19:54:09+00:00

Hate to say it but someone can't give consent while under the influence of alcohol based on the law.

wallaceeffect · 2012-08-29T16:40:52+00:00

Firstly, no.

However, I'm curious about what "I sort of ask for her consent without saying the words" means. How do you ask for consent without saying anything?

FULLRETARD88 · 2012-08-29T18:02:33+00:00

I think the fact she said "fuck it just put it in" would get you off the hook. I doubt she'll lie about it, or tell people you raped her anyway.

Tralan · 2012-08-30T02:41:20+00:00

Yes. Everything you do is rape because you are a man. You can kiss your entire future goodbye simply for existing.

Stevieb1972 · 2012-08-30T19:43:11+00:00

Here is the law: if she decides at any time in the future that it was rape, then it was rape.

2012-08-30T08:08:21+00:00

it doesn't matter what happens, its always rape.

2012-08-30T08:35:41+00:00

It's fucking bullshit isn't it? In Australia i've never had to worry about it and i've done it plenty of times. (not bragging or anything), I'm just saying what a crook system. Unless Australia has similar laws? But i've never heard of guys been accused of rape because both people were drunk..

Title	Did I rape her?
Author	throwaway77779201929
Upvotes	27
Comments	93
Date	August 29, 2012 1:30 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/z0ofo/did_i_rape_her/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/did-i-rape-her.1014733 https://theredarchive.com/post/1014733

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