Almost eleven months to the day my son, Philip, was born. I wasn't able to be there during his birth as I had been for my daughter's three years earlier. I had just been diagnosed with shingles, which wasn't life threatening to me (though it hurts like a sonofabitch), but the doctor said it could be dangerous for my son. A few days later the doctor cleared me, so I went to the maternity ward to see my wife and newborn son. He was perfect. That's as close as I can come to describe it when I saw him. I suppose only those fathers out there would know how hard this moment is to describe when you see your child for the first time. He was a tiny pink bundle of furious crying, healthy in every way. Every way except one. After he had finished suckling I offered to change him. It was hard not to notice immediately what had been done to him. He had this crude bandage around his penis soaked in antibacterial ointment. I looked at my wife and asked her why she had done this to him. To which she replied, "Yea, of course. Why wouldn't we have him circumcised?".

To this day I don't know why, but I left the conversation at that until recently. Before he had been born we had probably discussed circumcision once, and I had told her I saw no reason for it and would rather not put him through it. I brought it up the other day and asked her again, with my son's grandmother there, "Why did you have our son's penis cut?". In her response it became clear that she had completely forgotten and dismissed my objections, but she had no explanation as to why except for tired old hygiene myths and for aesthetic reasons. I then explained how wrong this was, and went over the various myths that people use to advocate it, that most doctors know it's pointless. I don't know what angered me more, the fact that my son had been cut and without my permission, or the looks on their faces as I told them this. They looked at me as if I has speaking nonsense, as if I had lost my mind. It was obvious that they had no regard for what they had done. To them it was a non-issue.

I love my wife dearly. She is the mother of both my children. I will most likely always love her, but I don't know if I will ever forgive her for having part of my sons penis sliced off.

Do not be like me. If you are an expecting father, or in a relationship where you both want to have kids, make sure your wife knows with out a doubt. Don't let your son get cut for nothing.