Ex-GF apologized 2 1/2 months Post-Breakup...

Il128 · 2016-08-03T07:37:55+00:00

You are her backup plan. She's just now discovering what it's like to be repeatedly pumped and dumped and she's starting to get worried that her puss won't lock down a high value male.

Ceapone66 · 2016-08-03T07:37:07+00:00

She's sorry. We agree on that. But she also says she's lonely and that's why she thinks of you. Even if you don't see it yet, it's better to move on. Girls have this power to make you feel sorry for them and take them back. You had this "cake". You know how oit tastes. Time for new cakes. New flavors, new experiences. Stay strong and don't go back. If you can't and you'll take her back just remember she's not the same in your eyes. She left you for what she percieved as a higher SMV guy. AWALT.

notmyusualreddit · 2016-08-03T07:31:27+00:00

Her coworker relationship did not work out the way she wanted...

Do you want to be her backup plan again?

EDIT: Warning: Reddit admins deleted me after 2 years of posting, even with current gold on my account, just because I posted a link to a youtube account that was easily available if you took a name news organizations were giving out and typed it into google yourself. The bias against Trump and the_donald is real.

BUT, the reddit morons forgot to lock out EDITING your previous posts as part of the permanent ban.

Carbone · 2016-08-03T14:14:03+00:00

Time for anal

TopTRP · 2016-08-03T14:56:39+00:00

Looking at her texts it seems she wants me to absolve her guilt

Yes, this is right.

Like others have said, she's been riding the CC and is finding it unfulfilling and now feels guilty about what she did to you and wants to be absolved so it stops weighing on her mind.

Having said that, this is a good lesson for everyone as it encapsulates a TRP teaching very well.

A WOMAN'S EMOTINAL STATE (feelings) IS HER REALITY

Right now, she's feeling like she messed up and you were a 10/10 guy etc etc.

So since she's currently feeling that way, THIS IS REALITY TO HER, so she messages you this stuff.

You know what happens if(when) you don't reply?

She'll get upset, and then once again you're the bad guy for not giving her what she wants.

You're going to get some text messages about how you're a worthless asshole who's neglectful and she's better off without you.

The thing to take away from this, is that none of it is real.

You're not an "infinity out of 10" and you're also not a neglectful asshole, that's just her current emotional state. None of it is reality.

Apanthropos · 2016-08-03T11:22:16+00:00

Something is off.

Read her messages again. You will see that in all the messages she doesn't say that she wants you back.

She is only sorry for being a bad person. She is sorry for being lonely. And for all that she wants to be forgiven.

You are still her second choice. That is why she does not express any feelings towards you.

trpthroway123 · 2016-08-03T13:56:58+00:00

So, she cheated on you with her coworker, while living with you?

You do realize in all likelihood she was with that guy for those 6 months where she was unhappy with you, right?

He didn't want her, she didn't want him, they wanted the kinky, sneaky, cheating, pen in company ink, thrill sex. Once the thrill was gone, it was over. That reality just smacked her in the face, she just realized what happened.

IMO, ignore. Don't answer. Delete, block, move on. Even if she's 1 in a thousand, there's a few million more out there.

If you have to answer "You're right, I can't get that year and a half you wasted back, but I can avoid wasting another second. Goodbye."

Yoji_84 · 2016-08-03T08:30:47+00:00

Why are you even considering a woman that nagged and bitched at you when you were together and then ditched you asap, especially when it's obvious she considers you the backup plan.

verily_rp · 2016-08-03T14:10:20+00:00

Bro, listen to me man. Don't text her. Don't call her. Don't do any contact with her. Zero.

This is a very selfish thing she's doing. I've said this many times in the forums because, like clockwork, many guys fail to understand the female psyche. But you seem to have some intuition for it.

The truth is, it has nothing to do with you, that she's calling you. She probably cares about you very little. No, the reason why she's calling you is, as you said it, to absolve HER guilt. She knows she fucked up with you by cheating/sleeping with a coworker but now her conscience is eating away at her. What she's looking from you is closure. DO NOT PROVIDE THAT TO HER. It will only enable her behavior and it will hurt your sanity and emotionally scar you further. Get as far away as possible from this girl. Tell her to fuck off if that's what it takes. Put YOUR best interests first. Remember, you are the prize. You, not her. She fucked up and she knows it.

sirfuckboysupreme · 2016-08-03T09:14:19+00:00

'Being alone and in that way, i started to think of you' -> I'm feeling shit and want you as my backup plan as I'm not getting any tingles right now.

Lol, you're above her. Go smash some 10/10 chicks and forget this one.

RedSkeller · 2016-08-03T12:07:23+00:00

She branch swung, broke up with you for summer (likely for summer fun), and now came crawling back. If you're at all still attached to her you can't even plate her. If you're even considering this, I would get another girl in the mix regardless, but there is no way in hell she is worth a second chance for LTR. She left an amazing situation, you're a man on the rise and let her live with you and your family and she threw it away like lint in her pocket.

lanky32 · 2016-08-03T13:04:13+00:00

She is manipulating. Her texts do not show sincerity at all. Her co-worker broke up with her. Do not reply. Fuck other girls. She is not worth it.

writewhereileftoff · 2016-08-03T15:08:24+00:00

This girl is a next level dramaqueen. Proceed to completely ignore. You're doing good man, keep it up.

deville05 · 2016-08-03T09:43:45+00:00

Dont get involved with her at all. Its too soon. This is literally exactly what happened to me almost a year after my break up and I thought I had moved on. But you cant control the feelings you get.. You can only control how you deal with them. And I dealt with it like a beta all the while thinking that i be fine and feel no attachment.. She got married then and according to her everything changed and she realized what she did to me n that she was a bitch and how much better it was with me. Said she just wanted to meet and apologize

I thought sure why not... We'll Meet up a couple of times.. Say whatver was left to say for closure, fuck a few times (i was hoping for this cuz seeing her phone number made me picture her jiggle when i fucked her from behind).. And move on.

All those things happened, multiple times and unknowingly i started cating or having expectations..not for her to be with me.. But for her to listen to my advice and maybe leave her abusive husband.

But trust me man.. They dont want to leave even an abusive marriage (or perhaps it never was).. Because they know how truely worthless they are inside and how no one will want them.. So the opportunity to have someone as opposed to being alone is too much to pass up.. Unless of course you extend an olive branch of commitment which i just didnt do. I only wanted her to get out of a miserable situation and be happy/look for happiness. But since i didnt say "ill be the one who makes you happy", she eventually went back, i gave up.. we stopped contact and i recently found out she has a kid. I am hoping she found happiness.. But knowing her, its probably not true.

I was just a temporary break from life and a shoulder to cry on (disguised as guilt and shame). And the truth is... I let it happen. It was my fault. Dont be me.

brooklynisburnin · 2016-08-03T14:55:52+00:00

Have some pride and block that girl, "you could do better" is not a silly cliche phrase, not when self improvement runs deep in your core.

Albacorewing · 2016-08-03T15:00:14+00:00

She only wants to use you. Stay clear of her if you are smart.

dr_warlock · 2016-08-03T15:18:24+00:00

You only did one thing wrong ==> you told her you could fix things.

Read: By the time you have 'the talk' she's already packed and planned her exit

Archive.is isn't working now for some reason, but look at the thread in my submission history to see a good comment section.

chooseaburner · 2016-08-03T16:11:41+00:00

Looking at her texts it seems she wants me to absolve her guilt. Please tell me guys if it’s anything otherwise...

If you're looking for an excuse to take her back, if you really do just have an Achilles Heel for her, knock yourself out.

Personally I'd plate her ass. Make it clear that she went from marriage material to having been emotionally manipulative, abusive and just wasted over a year of your life playing at the idea of relationship material when she was willing to leave for some Johnny Come Lately who provided the facade of a fantasy she realized after the fact wasn't real. Which is exactly why she came crawling back. Then you can have some superb hate fucking. Make it completely obvious you're cheating on her every chance you get. Ask her how she likes it. That's what I'd do.

But then, I'm a rotten asshole who- apparently- has something called a dark triad personality type, whatever that means, who is completely willing to be exceedingly petty. It's the only thing that gets me up in the morning anymore, that and wondering how I can make people miserable. Don't be me.

(/s, duh)

I was her first for everything and at the time thought I was going to marry this girl (She was perfect in every way).

The problem with having someone for who you are their first is that you have no idea how they're going to change. Its like planting a seed without know what will grow- you could get weeds, poison ivy, or roses. Or maybe you get a fuck you tree.

Delete the messages, block her. Even if we assume she's truly repentant texts are a shitty way of articulating that fact. It's lazy and insincere and reeks of her trying to avoid being confrontational.

Jakei34 · 2016-08-03T13:10:18+00:00

You know what to do.

srtor · 2016-08-03T15:41:40+00:00

Once a cheater, always a cheater. 'nuff said.

mabden · 2016-08-03T17:13:05+00:00

tell me guys if it’s anything otherwise...

It is not.

Her trade up plan failed. I could probably tell you exactly what went down between her and this co-worker, but it would be more wasted words.

Live Life Large.

Kbb_cpaca · 2016-08-04T02:11:59+00:00

Thank you everyone for your insights. She will always be dead to me.

UnluckyPenguin · 2016-08-03T17:03:43+00:00

Block the number. Remember there are a million women out there that are better than her.

the-bum-hammer · 2016-08-03T15:53:46+00:00

Her reasons for leaving me was because I was... insert made up reasons that made her feel better for sucking other cock

After seeing her messages, it was clear that she was used as a cum dumpster. She did all the dirty shit with him and then he discarded her like a piece of trash.

But good, old you will accept her now-overly-used set of holes, right? That's what she wants.

goodfella4life · 2016-08-03T15:57:38+00:00

Do not answer her. By answering you are playing her game and the game is about her feeling better not you. Let her simmer in her guilt. Forever.

fakeplastictrees87 · 2016-08-03T16:13:15+00:00

Yep, don't even try to make a contact. Whore stays a whore. Once woman breaks with you, it is over in this life. You can't make it work ever. It's like someone kills your parents, and tries to make up with you. Really?

neopet · 2016-08-03T17:17:45+00:00

You need to block her number ASAP

Arcturus_ · 2016-08-03T17:44:15+00:00

Who the fuck cares, delete and block.

MattyAnon · 2016-08-03T17:56:04+00:00

only gave her love when we had sex.

Women have managed to shift the narrative to the point where they feel they are entitled to unlimited male support regardless of sexual frequency.

Whereas If you "give love" unconditionally, you'll find yourself sexless within a matter of weeks.

Her grovelling texts are basically "I miss my beta bucks", in the form of support / resources / attention / etc. She goes off, has her AF, gets dumped, realises how great you are.

But here's the kicker: allow her back and she'll be back to behaving exactly the same straight away. She won't change because she can't change. They never do. They never learn.

You want a girl on YOUR terms... which means hot sex, no demands, no drama, no exclusivity. Anything else and you're on a sliding scale of giving her shit and doing shit for her in exchange for the sex that you both want. Exclusivity is the worst because it's one way (she can and will cheat instantly, it's harder for you) and because it gives her so much security and so much leverage against you.

wanderer779 · 2016-08-03T18:21:11+00:00

It kind of sounds like you are tue exception that was actually too alpha by focusing totally on yourself and your mission. So she was getting the tingles but no emotional validation or comfort and she left.

Anyway, whatever it was just keep kicking ass and forget about her.

SexySmexxy · 2016-08-03T18:45:48+00:00

Of course she's sorry.

But that means nothing...

What's done is done, how can you ever trust her again.

If you had 20 other girls numbers in your phone you definitely wouldn't be strung up on her.

Abundance. Mentality.

Vajesticles · 2016-08-03T23:50:08+00:00

Continue dread game.

Mufasa15 · 2016-08-03T08:05:10+00:00

AWALT.

She definitely is not LTR material, but why not plate her? If that is what you want...

nodoxsavefreespeech · 2016-08-03T16:28:30+00:00

You won't be able to plate her. She will repeat everything she did over and over until she smacks the wall. Do you want to deal with this?

You can try but you'll most likely fail. Who knows? It may be another, good lesson for you.

trp_ocd · 2016-08-03T13:14:57+00:00

"Cool. Thanks"

Delete number and block

stonepimpletilists · 2016-08-03T17:05:23+00:00

Invite her over to blow you/fuck. Absolute engage nothing other than her accepting those terms. Show her the door afterwards.

Revisit in a few months, or she ghosts you. Either way you win

Title	Ex-GF apologized 2 1/2 months Post-Breakup...
Author	Kbb_cpaca
Upvotes	31
Comments	52
Date	August 3, 2016 7:24 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/4vxawl/exgf_apologized_2_12_months_postbreakup/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/ex-gf-apologized-2-12-months-post-breakup.109230 https://theredarchive.com/post/109230

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