I don't want to lose my virginity to an escort, that's the easy way out!

vcreativ · 2022-06-03T16:46:37+00:00

That's fine. I can see where you're coming from.

I don't know if it's the coward's way out. I personally am not a super big fan of seeking hookups and flings. But occasionally life happens.

As with anything, too much of it points at a pathological problem. I'd much rather people sorted those out instead of risking possible life generation with a stranger or whatever else could happen.

There are people on here that genuinely ask themselves if I don't hire someone, will this ever happen, and if it doesn't will I regret it for the rest of my life.

That's a tough question to ask. And cowards don't tend to ask tough questions.

I get the bond thing, though. You do you.

coffeetablestain · 2022-06-03T16:42:14+00:00

Nobody cares.

I am not saying that to be flippant or edgy or unhelpful, it's a harsh reality. All through your life, the only people who will really, truly care about the conditions in which you had sex for the first time is you, and you can also choose to not worry about it if you want.

Worrying about those circumstances is like wanting to take a vacation somewhere nice but having difficulty because you're too worried about what color shoes you'll be wearing the whole time.

Sex is often just a thing that couples do to enjoy themselves and their partner and is not a big deal. If your partner is also hung up on sex like it's some kind of magical, special thing that needs to have special music playing and soft lighting, you're both going to have a very hard time managing your expectations versus reality.

You don't HAVE to have sex with anyone at all, it doesn't change anything inside you. If you WANT to have sex with someone, it's (comparatively) easy also and you can do it however you want with whoever wants to do it with you.

Here's a tip though: it's not that amazing. It's nice, it's also awkward and goofy and you both makes smells and noises and it feels nice when it's with someone you can laugh with about it all.

Tostitos153 · 2022-06-03T22:13:11+00:00

My dude. You want to meet and have sex with a woman that you form a connection with? That’s fine! It’s your parameters. You’re not going to achieve that by posting on Reddit everyday. Are you at any point planning on taking a break and going outside to do stuff? Do you have anything in mind? Hobbies, work, events, activities? Cause she’s not going to just come knocking on your door. You post on Reddit everyday about the same stuff. It seems like you finally got your haircut which is progress. Now, what are you thinking moving forward?

honey-bundy-88 · 2022-06-03T19:14:58+00:00

You don’t have to do what everybody else is doing. You have free will. You also don’t need to be told how to feel about a topic. Go outside and experience the world for yourself.

You post on here a lot looking for “guidance”, but I think what you want really want is for other people to make decision for you and it’s kinda pathetic. Latching onto every red pill theory you read about and immediately coming here crying and asking if it’s true. Seriously dude, get help.

magic_damage · 2022-06-04T02:06:01+00:00

In with you pal, wait untill you want for that.

Let me tell you my story:

When i was 15, i wasnt too into relationships and sex as some of my friends. I was a shy and a little introverted. My hobbys at that age were playing video games and spend time with friends. Most of my friends were men.1 My father is an old school dad, when i was born my father was 44 Y-O. My father was born in 1956, still living (now in june 14 78Y-O). He lost his father (my grandfather) at the age of 13. The encomy wasnt good and my father start working at the age of 14 to help my grandmother. My father was forced to grown up. When he was working with an older group of coworkers a common thing to do in that times were going out for drinks and prostitutes. For him was good and now with that context, when i was 15 my father started to asking me every sometime if i already lose my virginity. And my father was worrying about it because if you are not interested in sex at that age like he was, there must be something wrong "with me" or "i was gay". Meanwhile in my Uncle and Aunt house my cousin about 5 years older than me was starting a relationship with a transsexual woman. And my uncle was having a lot of issues. That time i didnt knew that about my cousin and my father told my mother that i must not know about that and at first my Uncle was a ashamed for that. My aunt was supportive with my cousin. About january of 2015, one month before my 16 birthtday my father was pushing me hard to go get laid. Most of the time, untill i say ok i will do it. 10 days before my birthday i go to do that with a family. Then i lost my virginty with a Woman 28 years old. And to be honest i was too nervous to enjoy it the way i would like and was a bad a experience for me. That let me a low self steem that i cannt get laid if i dont pay. That destroy my self steem for about 2 o 3 years untill i met my first girlfriend. Then i started to enjoy sex properly.

For fullfilling the expectations of my father i lose the opportunity of have my first time with my first girlfriend. My conclusion was that there is no diference between hook up only one time and being virgin. Only makes you feel less akwards if in group they ask you if you are virgin. Because you will not pointed as "virgin". And may produce more harm than happyness. Well that was my experience. I hope its help you. Good luck pal.

DocGlabella · 2022-06-03T19:19:41+00:00

I’ve stopped commenting on the escort stuff, because most of the time I’m too busy to have a long Reddit argument. But contrary to what a couple of people have said in this thread, people really do care who you have had your first sexual experience with. At least I do and I don’t really think that most women are so different from me. It might not be a dealbreaker, but it would give me a moment of pause to know that someone I was seriously considering dating had lost their virginity to an escort. To me that speaks to a different set of values around sexuality than I hold myself, which would lead to long-term incompatibility issues. I also need an emotional bond in order to have sex with someone, and would ideally like a partner that is the same. A person who has lost their virginity to an escort suggests that they are not the same as me in their core sexual values which would be a negative characteristic in my eyes.

n0name1026 · 2022-06-03T16:21:52+00:00

Worrying about losing your virginity to an escort is like being ashamed that you got your first massage from an RMT instead of a girlfriend. Sex work is a valid form of employment and like with any employment there will be people who exploit their employees(pimps) those who have a co-op style of ownership(brothels) and freelancers (self employed escorts). Escorts are professionals and many of them aren't ashamed of what they do, especially in countries where sex work is legal like the Netherlands.

If you want your first time to be with someone you already know, then that is valid. Demisexuality is valid as well and you shouldn't be shamed for it despite how redpill content tries to encourage men to be emotionally detached sex machines. Theres nothing wrong with a man who pursues the services of an escort so long as he's doing so ethically (e.g. doing research on safe, ethical providers who have been reviewed online so hes not contributing to exploitation of any kind).

xXMachineWomanXx · 2022-06-03T17:30:15+00:00

I don’t understand seeing sex as cowardly or shameful. Have sex how you want. If you don’t want it, don’t. Why is this hard?

unlivedbread · 2022-06-03T17:21:00+00:00

nah, I've seen escorts when I've been too lazy/afraid to go out and find women. its pretty normal. I'd recommend going out and trying to meet them irl tbh

Ithrewallofitaway · 2022-06-04T07:57:23+00:00

Coward's way out? Honestly, its personal preference. The 'V' card is the stupidest ideology on the planet. Who cares? I would say use an escort if you are hot and horny, but, when you want a relationship that would be different.

Gaddammitkyle · 2022-06-08T01:58:55+00:00

Demisexuality is a farce, dont buy into it. Theres a lot of extremely intelligent people who are still single because they're not hot, girls and guys. It's meant to diverge oneself from the "carnal and shallow masses" by claiming you value intellectualism and deep conversations over basal sexual characteristics, but what it translates to is just having two standards, intelligence and physical appearance. You're still picking the hottest you can find, just narrowing it down to non-fuckboy, non-badbitch types.

Also I found that most lower class and stingy dudes are the only ones who shame escorting. Not because it's a win win for the girl and the guy, but because a woman is making money having sex, something very very few men can do. It's usually just a form of sex envy by men who wish they could get paid to fuck.

kingpinkatya · 2022-06-09T01:35:56+00:00

I'm confused. You say you're demi and seeking a bond, but you have a fixation with virginity loss. Wouldn't you care more about having a loving relationship and partner overall compared to sex?

Like, wouldn't finding a fulfilling relationship take priority over a concept like virginity at this time in your life?

Edit: You can also have fufilling relationships with casual sex partners, but since you're seeking a mutual (I assume) bond it sounds like you would prefer relationship > just sex.

Title	I don't want to lose my virginity to an escort, that's the easy way out!
Author	Pomeranian111
Upvotes	22
Comments	53
Date	June 3, 2022 3:34 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/v420eh/i_dont_want_to_lose_my_virginity_to_an_escort/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/i-dont-want-to-lose-my-virginity-to-an-escort.1117416 https://theredarchive.com/post/1117416

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