So I have this former work colleague I’ve re-reconnected with. He broke up with his gf months ago and just recently found me on Tinder.

He said he’d like to get to know me and has always thought I was nice and cute (his words) but he’s still healing from his previous relationship and doesn’t want to immediately hop into another relationship.

I’m cool with that and I mutually feel the same about him….but my problem is, how is he trying to get to know me if he hasn’t contacted me unless I say something. We did hang out last week and he didn’t seem very distant or uninterested. He’s even shared some things about himself and his life. It’s like in his words and in person he seems interested.

But because he doesn’t go out of his way to contact me on his own, I tend to feel like I’m trying to hard saying something at least once everyday or every other day. Like what’s his plan here? He even seems interested in meeting again but doesn’t bring up any suggestive days, I end up doing it.

Only time he initiated anything as far as hanging out was when he wanted to go to a particular spot (we went to a state park) he likes to go to and even brought a hammock for us to sit in. Afterwards when he dropped me off at home he texted me and said he had fun hanging out with me.

I’m letting him have his space and I’m trying to not wait for him to heal or make a choice. But I’m still leaving a window of opportunity and I feel like it’s one sided. I also feel silly if I asked certain questions to get to know him more because I know he isn’t pursuing a relationship yet. I want to get to know him more too but I don’t want to push anything or seem obsessive.

I wanted to ask what his middle name is just out of the blue but I’m not sure if that’s too personal or anything. There just seems to be so many green flags that gives me surety that he’s interested but then communication on his end is very low. You have to summon him to get anything out of his head. I also feel like we’re both dancing around something we don’t want to share to the other person.

And just to make things clear, we’ve never talked over the phone, mostly texted. And he usually responds, just hours later depending on how his day is going or the next morning.