Dating the way the older generations did?

dulciori · 2020-12-04T00:12:22+00:00

I took a look at some of your other posts about him too. Honey, I am saying this out of love. You need to leave him. You deserve better.

Sage_Planter · 2020-12-04T00:16:17+00:00

I'm sorry, but why are you wasting your time and energy with this man? What are you getting out of staying with him? Your relationship seems rocky, at best. He treats you like an option. You admit that you want to explore other options.

A big part of FDS is that we're not interested in being in a relationship for the sake of being in a relationship. If something isn't working for us, we end it, and we move on. We don't hang on to men that no long add value to our lives, and we certainly don't need to cling to a subpar man until a new one comes along. Many of the women here, myself included, would love to be in the right relationship, but until then, we're happily single.

Every bit time and energy you invest in your boyfriend could be invested in someone much more important: YOU. Take all that effort and put it towards your hobbies, your career, and your education.

souredskittles · 2020-12-04T00:20:55+00:00

I just saw your post in the relationship sub. Woah this time they really did it. You definitely are not crazy and what you feel is totally justified. It’s hard to tell you how to go about it when I don’t know what the situation is? Do you live with him?

You already know you can do better which is the first big step. I would say the next one is to find a living space for yourself or somewhere safe you can go.

When that’s resolved, you really need to do the block and delete and hold your guns because it will be hard. He will beg and plead but his time is up, you gotta be strong because he’s probably going to try to hold in to you.

The next step is purely mental: you will fight thoughts that you can work it out and he will change. Come back to fds and read the handbook or posts, men never change, what could’ve been worked out (imo pretty much nothing since being disrespectful and an over all shit bf is a personality trait) should’ve been long ago. Don’t waste more time sis.

I think you’re wasting your time trying to “show him”. He doesn’t care. Leave ASAP👏🏻

chateauduchat · 2020-12-04T00:36:22+00:00

“I cannot leave my bf”

Yes, yes you can. You are a WOMAN. You are the prize. You can leave. If I can leave an abusive freak twice my age and tried to dozens and dozens of times, you can leave this man who doesn’t add to your life. It doesn’t matter the reason. If you know you can do better, why are you with him? Does the prize settled for second best? NO! Be single, be FREE. The first steps are the scariest. Everything after that is a breeze. Trust me.

Cognitivedecadence · 2020-12-04T00:23:02+00:00

I feel like there’s this expectation that something has to happen to break up with someone, like they have to hurt you bad somehow. F this! If you’re realizing you’re not being treated well then it’s time to go. It’s hard to end a relationship even for all the right reasons, but you are strong and you have a good life waiting for you to come live.

EffectiveHoneydew422 · 2020-12-04T00:20:39+00:00

"I just Cannot leave my bf" You need to elaborate on this, not to me but to yourself. Find out within yourself why. That is what you are avoiding and bargaining with this idea that you can stay with him but somehow tell yourself that you are single and that you someone will still court you and perhaps even propose marriage. This has nothing to do with your grandparents or generations, you are not leaving a relationship that you admit isn't going anywhere. Why?

EveSerpent · 2020-12-04T00:28:00+00:00

You might want to ask yourself what kind of man would want to date a woman who’s still with another guy, and one that she’s been with for years.

Wtfpwned69 · 2020-12-04T00:31:53+00:00

Read some of your posts and part of FDS is listening to your gut when it’s telling you something bc most of the time, WE’RE RIGHT. If there’s nothing going on between him and that girl, why did he get so upset when you showed up at the store and saw him talking to her? That’s not a very nice welcome /-: it probably embarrassed you! If nothing is going on, why did he act like he was caught in the act? I think you deserve better and I think you know it too.

OrangeyPanda · 2020-12-04T00:28:18+00:00

Tomorrow is the day you break up for good. Write out exactly what you want to say now, be confident in yourself and just close this chapter in your life. A HVM is only going to be attracted to a HVW and you can't be that if you are a person that let's herself be an option in a man's life. You can do this!

missangel89 · 2020-12-04T00:34:01+00:00

You should take the energy you give worrying about this relationship and focus on your own life, especially cultivating better relationships with friends and family. Have you thought about therapy? It may be a better use of your time to work on any existing problems with a professional to help build a better life.

2020-12-04T00:48:41+00:00

Women chasing uninterested men has always confused me.

Title	Dating the way the older generations did?
Author	fdsstudent
Upvotes	10
Comments	32
Date	December 4, 2020 12:04 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/k69m5e/dating_the_way_the_older_generations_did/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/dating-the-way-the-older-generations-did.1193429 https://theredarchive.com/post/1193429

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